Reviewer: marshaa1306

Public Review
“Bridge of Worlds”

Story by Robinsongbird

Title/Cover - 9/10
The title of this story is apt considering what the story holds. Plus, it is actually symbolizing a person, rather than a physical bridge, which I thought was really clever.
The image you have as the background for your cover is pretty but the font for the title completely ruins the mood. I’d advise changing your font to be more elegant and cursive-like so it matches the vibe of the cover.

Blurb - 6/10
When I read your blurb, it completely fried my brain. I mean, holy mackerel! There are a few truckloads of information dumped into the blurb and it’s just not appealing at all. You can include this information in an introduction of sorts if you’d like, but it doesn’t belong in your blurb. So, I’d advise dramatically cutting down on the information in your blurb. Find the most relevant bits and pieces of it and include those then ask your questions at the very end of the blurb. Remember, you’re trying to grab a reader’s attention with your blurb so make sure your questions are interesting enough to spark their interest.

First few chapters/Exposition - 10/10
The exposition of this story is written beautifully. Even if I didn’t read your blurb, it’s easy to figure out what is going on in the story and I could readily visualize the world you created. Plus, you created a promising intrigue about Kiran and what is special about him.

Plot - 20/20
I find myself speechless here. I don’t really even know what to say; your plot is absolutely wonderful. So, I’m going to say what I liked the most about your plot.
I like how you wrote both Silver and Kiran’s points of view; it makes your story quite interesting and it clues readers in to what is happening in both characters’ minds.
It is so intriguing how Kiran is human-like and he is Silver’s match. It really makes me wonder why Kiran is so special and what his purpose is on Earth.

Pace - 10/10
The pacing of this story is fabulous. Even in the first chapter you’ve included slower moments and a faster moment when Kiran shows up and accidentally flips Silver onto the ground. Plus, the pace of the moment is conveyed perfectly because your writing is so eloquent.

Grammar, Punctuation, Syntax & Diction - 9/10
There are some minimal errors with your dialogue. For example, sometimes you put spaces between the quotation marks and the first or last words of the sentence inside them. And you forget to close your quotation marks a few times. These mistakes can be fixed with a quick lookover of your writing. Other than that, your writing is word perfect. Fantastic job; I don’t see many stories that are as masterfully written as this one.

Characters - 15/15
Before I go into your main characters individually, let me commend you on creating such realistic characters that really seem like they are alive.
Silver: Silver is a kind, compassionate girl who I suspect has a bit of a rebellious side to her. She’s very complex and I love it. I also love how I can see into her head because her thoughts are so relatable. She gets nervous about whether she will have a Match or not, she is frustrated with her ignorant father, and she is unsure what to think when she finds out her Match is Kiran. All these thoughts are so natural to think and it really brings Silver to life.
Kiran: There is so much mystery surrounding this character that it’s hard not to keep reading just to see what he will do. He seems to be very devoted to Silver but there are some uncertainties there. There is also something special about Kiran that I will have to keep reading to find out. All in all, Kiran is super intriguing and I can’t wait to see how his story unfolds.

Overall Enjoyment - 15/15
If I’m being honest, this is one of the best stories I have read so far on Wattpad. The plot is intriguing, the characters are interesting, and the world is phenomenally fantastical. If your cover and blurb would have been better, I would have readily given you a perfect score. Please continue writing, even if it’s not this story, because you have a talent and you need to share it!

Total Score: 94/100