Xiao Zhan's POV

The sun rays sneaked through my window and fell on my motionless body. The wind played with the curtains and caressed my cheeks, it felt as if it was trying to wipe my tears away. But, it failed in doing so.

It's been two months since I came back here. I still remember how desperate I was to come here during those initial days in that time, but now things are very different. I want to go back. I want to go back in time. I want to go home. For me, home is a place where I find love, warmth, care, and mainly, my Yibo.

I got discharged from the hospital fifteen days back. Now, I was at this place called home, all alone. I felt lonely. I was scared. I was depressed. But no one seems to understand me.

Every time there's a knock on the door, I feel it's you. My heart thumps at the imagination of seeing you when I open the door, but you never came.
My friends want to accompany me and asks me not to stay alone, but what do they even know? Even with them around, I still feel lonely. I feel like I'm in a dark pit searching for that ray of light which leads me to you.

"Yibo, you aren't just a dream right? "
I whispered as I sat up on the bed, wiping my tears away as I know he won't be coming to wipe them for me and hug me tight as he used to do back then.

No. Yibo is not a dream. Yibo is real. His love was real. His warmth was real. Everything about him was real.

I got up from the bed and stood on my weak legs. Yes, I wasn't physically fit yet. Don't ask about my mental health now, because it's the worse. I slowly dragged my feeble body towards the bathroom to have a quick shower. Yibo won't come here to carry me to the bathroom, so I have to do it myself now.

After having the shower I dumped back my body on the bed as my mind wandered around those beautiful moments that I had with my man. A small smile arose on my face when the image of his smiling face continuously replayed in my mind.

I was about to drift to sleep when the loud thunderstorm made me jerk. Yibo would have for sure taken me in his embrace at moments like this.
Soon, the pitter patter of the tiny droplets were heard and the cold breeze tried to blow my sadness away.
I gave a small smile and took a deep breath as I got off the bed and walked out of the room.

I unlocked the main door and stood at the door step, looking at the tiny droplets dancing to the rhythm of the wind. I took a few steps forward, away from the shelter of my house and stood there, allowing the rain to wash my body.

I lifted my face and looked up at the sky, which was crying along with me.
"Yibo, where are you? You had promised to always hold an umbrella above my head and never let me drench. " I said in a low voice.

"I'm drenching now, Yibo. It's really very cold here. So, please come to me, Yibo. " I whispered. Pain was taking over me all over again. My heart was crying. It was tearing apart. How can I live without him? I was becoming weaker and weaker as days pass. I don't even know if I'll be alright, ever again.

I was about to give up on this weak body and collapse on the ground when my friends Meng Ziyi and Zhuocheng ran towards my house with an umbrella.

"Xiao Zhan, what are you doing here in this heavy rain? " Ziyi yelled but I was in no condition to answer her.

I guess they were the ones who carried me back in and laid me back on bed covering me with some thick quilts so as to bring up my body temperature. I remember nothing about what happened after I met them until I woke up with a high fever the next morning.

The next few months passed in the same way. People tried hard to convince me, but none of their words actually mattered to me. The only thing that ran in my mind every second of my life was those precious memories that I had with my Yibo. That was the only thing that kept me alive. The HOPE of seeing my Yibo was the only reason that I still breathed.

And that was the moment when a thought flashed in my mind. I met Yibo when my life was in danger. I was almost dead, but he saved me. So, I think I'll be able to see him again if I put my life in danger.

With that thought in my mind I went to the bathroom and filled my bath tub with water. I got in, and tried to drown myself, hoping to see Yibo again.

But, it didn't work. I felt suffocated, I felt like I was dying, but Yibo still didn't come there.

'Maybe, this isn't the right method. '
I thought.

Yes, I met him when I was almost hit by a car, so maybe I'll get to see him again if I recreate the same situation.

Thinking so, I quickly changed my clothes and ran to the streets. I went to the same street where I was about to get hit by a car before, no, I think I was actually hit by the car. The same street from where I time travelled. Yes, this is the right place.

I closed my eyes and stood there at the middle of the busy road, expecting to be run over by a car. I may either time travel or die. Both the options are okay with me because if I time travel I'll get to see him again, if not I won't have to live this life without him.

I took a deep breath when I heard the continuous honking. I was ready to challenge the fate but things didn't go as planned.

I failed to notice Zhuocheng at the cafe at the end of the street. He saw my actions and pulled me away from the car before it could hit me.

"Have you lost your fucking mind, Xiao Zhan? " He yelled at me.

Yes, I have. So what?
I didn't bother to answer his question and walked past him, as the disappointment took over me again.

........................................................................

Now, it has been almost 7 months since I came here. I never wanted to give up. No matter who believes me or not, I'll still search for him. I'll search for a way to reunite with my love. But, everytime I went in search for an answer, I could obtain nothing else other than heartbreak and disappointment.

I had went in search of Yibo's home. I still remembered the way to his home, no our home to be precise. Even though this city has been crazily developed, I can still find the way back home. I was soo full of hope when I walked to that place, but... Our home... It... It wasn't there anymore. It was replaced by a very posh looking house. But, I still didn't want to give up.

I pressed the calling bell and waited for a response. A man in his early 30s came out of the door. I enquired him about that place and he said that it had been more than 20 years that they purchased this place and that they have no idea about the previous owner and that... The previous owner might have been... dead by now.

I gave a sad chuckle and thanked him before walking away.
"Dead? "
There's no way for him to die. How can he die? No... I won't believe this... I'll search for you, Yibo. I'll never give up until I see you again.

I then walked to Jie' house, Seungyoun' place and all other Yibo's friends house... But I found nothing.

I then proceeded towards the Granny's restaurant, but the restaurant wasn't there anymore. It was replaced by a fancy looking flower shop. I sighed in defeat as tears flooded my eyes. But no, I shouldn't give up. So, I walked to that park where we went to see the sunset and that place... It wasn't there anymore... It was now replaced by a huge mall.

I walked to the security guard of the mall and asked him about the park as he looked quite old.

"I don't know. This whole area was redeveloped around 20-25 years ago. "
He said.

I thanked him and started walking again. So, that was my last hope. But it seems like..... I collapsed on my knees and started crying bitterly clutching my chest so as to ease my hurting heart.

What am I supposed to do now? Was Yibo really a dream? No, he can't be. Yibo is real. Yes, he is. I'm never giving up on you, Yibo. I'll never. It doesn't matter whom much it hurts, but I'll still keep searching for you until my last breath.

It was on August 5th that I had decorated my whole house, expecting him, who'll never come. I had baked a cake and lit candles too, waiting to hear that knock on the door. But that knock was never heard. So, I decided to blow the candles and cake the cake and also make the three wished in his stead.

My first wish was my second wish to come true. My second wish was my third wish to come true and my third wish was for him of course... It was for him to appear in front of me when I open my eyes, but that never happened.

"Yibo... Please come to me... I want To See You Again. "

........................................................................

"What if... there comes a day when I go back to the future and can not come back here? "

"I won't let you go. "

"But... What if I go? "

"Then... I'll come to you... I'll come find you. "

"Is that a promise? "

"Mm. "

I opened my eyes as tears rolled down them. This dream again. I have been seeing him very often in my dreams these days. I sat up on the bed and wiped my tears.

"Yibo... You had promised... So, you'll come to me right? " I asked and gave a small smile as I walked towards the bathroom, so that I can have a quick shower and get ready soon so that I can go there.

Where? That place, the place where I saw him for the first time. Yes, that street near the cafe. I have spent these past few months standing in front of that cafe so that by any chance I may get to see him again. Sun, rain, wind nothing bothered me as long as the hope of seeing him again burned inside me.

I walked to that street again and stood there looking at that exact spot, from where he had pulled me into his world. It doesn't matter if I don't get to see him by the end of the day, but I know that I'll see him oneday. I for sure know that he'll be back to me someday.

The sunset slowly faded away and the streetlights were now lighting the streets as the evening started to turn to gray. But it wasn't the usual windy evening as it was colder than usual. A low thunder was heard as the speed of wind increased. I still stood there, my feet stuck to the ground.

The tiny droplets from the sky started falling to the ground and I found it somewhat comforting to stand in rain like this because I feel like the sky's the only thing that understands and cries with me.

The rain slowly started drenching my body. I closed my eyes to feel the water hitting me. It was cold yet comforting. I stood there for some more time not caring at those questioning glances, as usual. I took a deep breath and was about to open my eyes when..... When I no more felt the droplets showering me.

I slowly opened my eyes and looked over my head and..... There was an umbrella shielding me from the rain. I also felt a warm presence beside me... A very warm presence... It was just like that warmth that I missed for an year.

I wanted to turn around and look who it was, but I was scared to be disappointed again. So, I stood there still and that's when I heard.....

"I'll be the one to always hold the umbrella for you, Zhan. No matter what, I'll always be there next to you whenever it rains, so that you won't drench in rain and catch a cold. "