nepenthe
(n.) something that can make you forget grief or suffering.

When I wake the next morning, I can't say that I'm as lighthearted as I was last night. Mom and dad are back home, and three police cars are parked in front. 

Mom attacks me with a hug once I enter. Dad is seated on the table, along with eight men dressed in black. The police.

"Cassidy! Are you fine, what happened?" she inquires, brushing a strand off my hair. 

"We. . . I, I think we got robbed," I reply meekly. Mom nods, saying that the guy didn't get much. He stole several of my dad's watches, mom's fake jewelry, a laptop, and a hundred dollars. 

"It's okay, Cass. This won't EVER happen again. Your dad bought cameras for the whole house to be guarded, and also hired security for the front of the gate. Mom looks at me with concern etched on her face, and gives me an embrace again. I manage to fight the tears that are threatening to spill. 

"Where are Hazel and the others?" I ask. 

"They immediately left when they heard sounds. According to Hazel, it wasn't just one person. They were. . . . they were a lot," she replies.

I stutter and fail to string up words. 

"Oh. I'm glad they're fine," I reply. Mom forces a smile. 

"Since you're with Logan, maybe you two can fix the rooms upstairs. It'll remove that sour feeling and you might feel better. We have to finish talking to the cops," mom says. I nod and head upstairs, as Logan follows suit. 

My heart pounds in my chest as I feel it wanting to burst. My whole room is a mess; clothes scattered, drawers opened, papers and trinkets in a jumbled clutter. I struggle to not cry, but then my mind only remembers one thing. My iPad. 

Frantically, I open my closet and search for the familiar feel of the tablet against my skin. I almost cry out loud, but there it still was. Safe and sound. I sigh, and sit on the bed. 

"Cass, you okay?" Logan asks, sitting next to me and rubbing my back. 

"Of course I am! Sure as hell I survived that and nothing bad happened to me. I'm fine, Logan," I respond, trying to convince him. But it seems like I'm trying to convince more of myself. 

Logan nods. Standing up, he starts oicking up some of the papers and putting them in the trash. I open the upper drawer and reach for a new pair of sheets and blankets, but fail miserably. I groan, standing on my toes, but still nothing. 

Then I feel Logan's chest against my back as he gets the blanket with ease. 

"Here," he says, handing it to me. 

Act natural, Cassidy. Don't humilliate yourself now. 

"Thanks," I say, and turn to face the wall so he can't see how red my cheeks are. 

I remove the sheets and get a comforter from downstairs, as Logan continues cleaning and putting things back in place. We do this for an hour, until the room is finally spotless. 

After that, I plunge into my bed, not knowing what to do next. 

"Thanks Logan, for everything. You're free to go home if you want to," I say with a forced smile. 

"Go home? Not when you're this depressed," he says, plopping down next to me. 

"I'm fine!" I say with a laugh. 

"Yeah, I'm not THAT stupid, Cass. What do you want to do? You have to take your mind off this, you can't just lay here and do nothing," Logan says. 

"I'm just going to take a nap," I say, putting a pillow over my head so Logan can't see my face. I dive under the covers and grit my teeth. 

Logan sighs, but before I can use any more of my brain power, I fall into deep sleep. 

I'm in a garden, the one Logan showed me a River Valley High. I'm playing with some of the rabbits, when a door suddenly appears. It's colored in pink and has jewels around it, with a glowing light. Mystified by its appearance, I approach it slowly, and touch the doorknob. It is cold and dull and sent a shiver through my back that made me shake. But I open it nonetheless, and then a man with a black hood comes out. He has a gun. I run away as fast as I can, but there was nothing beyond the garden. It was a dead end; only Logan knew the exit. The gun is near, and the guy chases me. Until. . . 

"CASSIDY, WAKE UP!" Logan yells. 

My eyes spring open as I feel tears rolling through my face. I'm shaking, and judging by my sore throat I must've been yelling a lot. 

But I can't force myself to stop, I can't wear a mask now, I can't believe I'm crumbling into pieces in front of this boy. 

Logan wastes no time in wrapping his arms protectively around me. He makes soothing sounds and I can't help but cry into his shoulder. 

I almost died yesterday. Just if a small twinge of a different action happened. Just if the odds weren't in my favor. Just if time sped up a little more, if I hadn't done anything, if I was careless. 

But I escaped. That meant something, right? 

But I was SO close. 

I cry again. Logan's embrace tightens as I start shaking. 

Get ahold of yourself, Cassidy. Don't be so weak. 

Logan whispers soothing sounds and rubs my head until I finally stop crying, for what felt like an eternity. 

"It'll be okay, Cass. I'm right here, you're okay now," he says. My chest tightens as I try and erase what happened, but it's all so fresh and vivid in my head. 

Logan finally lets go of me, and I suddenly feel ten times colder without him. Shutting my eyes, I sit over my legs and hug Logan this time. I don't dare let go, not until the demons in my head have resurfaced. 

☆ ☆ ☆

author's note

this. is. so. cheesy.