"I will let you kiss me,
Before you bring a knife,
To break my morning bliss."

. . .

Do you believe until you see?

Shadows are enigmatic dancers, lurking and scattered across the blank sky with city lights but they hold secrets.

Emily's hands clenched, she's trying hard to grip something tightly but what?

Eyes, bloodshot eyes, socket, cat . . . she snaps her eyes open.

She wants to say something but everything ends up as incoherent mumbles. Her eyes fall on the wall clock, the seconds ticking by at 2.

It's just a dream.

But she's getting a sense of deja vu. It's not the first time. She wipes her forehead on the back of her hands, the wind is blowing as if cajoling her to come on the balcony, swaying the curtains in a delicate stroke.

Deep down, she knows it's not just a dream. She's bearing the umbra of the past. As she's thinking about other possibilities, her nausea gives in.

Somehow, she manages to rush and flush out of her every ounce of eating. After throwing a few angry splashes of water on her face, she's finally looking at the mirror.

A dull echo on the lifeless body, that's what she feels while her bloodshot eyes are gawking back at her.

She's not the Emily she used to be.

But after dark at night, isn't there the brightest morning? She wants to sob hysterically or throw her head back to laugh until she starts to cry but not now.

She wants hot chocolate, yes that will be enough to forget the night.

. . .

The pale moon is shining bright like a silver claw on the blank platter. She's sipping on her mug, sitting on the cradle—swinging gently.

Fear is strange, it doesn't make a grand entrance but instead makes a cobweb of dust and that grows overnight.

For a moment, Emily forgets everything.

She's savoring the gratification of slow wind, kissing her bare arms—her eyes are snapped shut.

"Couldn't sleep tonight?"

And that breaks her trance of tranquility.

A blonde face is staring at her with a concerned expression, same nose and jaw as her but shorter in height than her. Instead of giving a reply, Emily ends up questioning her back,

"Why are you outside?"

"I was out with Rio for his birthday—" she replies while putting her trench coat on the cradle handle, "And nope, before you will chide me for my irresponsible behavior, let me tell you, Rio came back to drop me here," She added.

Emily heaves a sigh of relief. Of course, her younger sister Elan isn't little anymore.

Elan shots back, "You didn't answer. Are you still getting those nightmares?"

Emily almost winces at the tone. The truth is far more normal than it seems. It's not just a nightmare. It's a vision that she's been reliving over and over again.

In daylight, everything appears normal. In great measure, she has learned to plaster a perfect smile, of course no one sees the crack behind her tight lips.

And there comes night, where the crowd breaks into chaos. Sometimes her house is on fire. Sometimes she's hearing the thrum of heartbeats as if signalling a message instead of pumping blood.

Many of those portions of dreams were attributed to the fact that minutes, seconds are just an illusion. They're eager for her attention. And then, there comes the cat—sometimes hung upon a rope.

No, she's not going to tell any of these to Elan.

Elan's waiting patiently enough for her answer, tapping on the grass.

"No, nothing like this. I just wanted some fresh air."

For a split of seconds, something flashes on Elan's eyes. Here she goes busted, she's sure that Elan isn't buying her lies.

But surprising her, Elan just nods.

"We should go back to sleep, considering we both have classes tomorrow."

She hums in apprehension.

"Wait—did you hear back from Dad?"

This time, Elan avoids her gaze.

"Yeah, he's busy at work."

Concise and cut to the point, leaving no scope of discussion. Finally they both retired to sleep. 

It's pure black night, making the pale gray moon so beautiful as if it's conjuring another plot for a new movie.

Something moves around the bushes. When Emily looks for the intruder, there's nothing—must be crickets, she muses.

Beyond the morning, the night's only getting darker. This time, a bloodshot eye is looking for the monster that was once kept at bay.

. . .

The rising sun, casting rosy hues on the blue sky, and the nascent rays—pulsating through her freshly picked up baggy shirt and tight ripped jeans, are making her heart thump dramatically. Overall, it's not unbearable heat but kinda like a warmth hug, seeping into her skin.

Something has changed, but it's not the street. The street is the same as ever but perhaps it's her.

The shadows of sun or the seas of her burning pain, she doesn't know if heartache medicates on sunflowers. Puddles flashed in the sun.

It's been thirty minutes, she's waiting in the parking spot of her University. She should have headed out for her class already but—

Her phone lights up with a new notification.

"Almost there!"

Her lips are forming a smile. Nathan! Her golden light in the threads of dark spots. Morning must've arrived with mother's hug in everyone's life but in her life, he's the halo of horizon in golden grace.

Love is stupid, love will have you running like a fool, love will make you giggle until your stomach hurts, love will make you hold on that unknown hope at 2 am.

She still remembers their first encounter, on the first day here. Nathan accidentally bumped his car with hers. Sure, a normal person would've apologized but oh boy! Their first meeting was nothing but filled with colorful insults.

But like every strong wall, somehow over that year her wall crumbled too.

Until one day, he asked her out.

Knock, knock!

She rolls down her window, and there he is flashing his white teeth! He's looking gorgeous on his white polo shirt and denim jeans, making her heart squishy with pride. This man is hers!

Instead of embracing him like a good girl friend, she huffed and pouted her lips. How dare he make her wait, expecting a kiss!

The wind is shaking blossoms from the trees while the lilies bloom with their clustering stars, is it new love—sprouting for a new beginning? She will never know.

"I'm sorry. I know, I know! I'm late but I was in charge of making breakfast today."

She knows he loves cooking something that she doesn't.

Yet she just gives a nonchalant shrug.

"You wouldn't forgive me even if I give you sunflowers," Nathan continues.

Before she can argue back, Nathan puts the bouquet in front of her face already. Finally, a wide grin appears on her face while she's putting her sunglasses down.

"Have mercy on my conscious mistake, pretty please," Nathan begs.

"Cowardice and conscience aren't the same thing," She says, already pulling him for a hug. And he complied, sniffing on her vanilla perfume.

Love is indeed a foolish task.

When she pulls out of his embrace, there's something on those green eyes that she ends up loving' more.

Nathan is her everything but why does she feel like something is missing out?

His eyes flicker heat, she's unconsciously chewing on her bottom lip. Before she can count on the time, Nathan grabs her neck to pull closer.

His mint breath is emerging on her ocean pool, except the butterflies never stop. She's lost so badly, drowning in the sweetness—yeah! This is her bliss.

After the minutes of tasting, teasing each other, they finally pulled back.

This time, when she flutters her eyes open instead of meeting the loveable green eyes—she's staring at the bloodshot black maze.

Her hands clenched around his ironed white shirt.

No, no! It can't happen here, not in front of him.

. . .

Word count: 1312

Total word count : 2409