A very, very special chapter.

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Nandini

When my eyes flickered open, the first thing that registered was an undeniable throbbing sensation in my head and the overwhelming need to throw up.

I sat up straight, pulling the duvet off my upper body to reveal the clothes of last night, and all the incidents came tumbling back- the party, the drinking, and an unexpected man carrying me into his car.

My eyes widened, the nausea long forgotten. I must be slow, because that is when I noticed my surroundings- the unfamiliar room with its grey walls and modern wallpaper staring at me, the overhead lamps, and the huge walk-in wardrobe. The panic that engulfed me was quick, calming only when rather familiar drawings made their way to me, stuck randomly on the wall beside. Mia's.

I looked to the other side of the bed, and sure enough, Manik was asleep in his office clothes, one of his hand below his head and his legs crossed.

I blinked. And then I blinked again, relief engulfing me.

Getting up in Manik's room was better than getting up in a stranger's at least.

"Staring at me, Nandini?" His voice startled me, the relief disappearing as I jumped in my place.

"Manik," I had to pull up my fake stern voice. "What am I doing here?"

He opened his eyes lazily. "I brought you here last night, after I saved you from a man who 'wanted in' on the 'life of the party'."

My cheeks flushed with embarrassment that I hadn't calculated about when I decided to get drunk. "I- I could've managed."

"I'm sure." His sarcasm wasn't reflected on his serene features, and the hole in my chest deepened. I had almost forgotten what it was like to wake up next to him, how he always looked so put together every morning while I looked like I had fought multiple wars in my sleep last night.

Self conscious of my appearance and suddenly aware of my throbbing head, I shifted away from him which made him sigh.

"I- I'll leave," I tell him, stuttering more than I usually do. It's the hangover, I swear, and not how tempting he looks in his white rolled up shirt and messy hair and husky morning voice.

"It's 8 A.M, you leave from here like this and I'm sure the neighbourhood will assume you're doing a morning walk of shame," he teases, eyeing my little dress before pointing towards a door. "That's the bathroom. Freshen up and take a shower, I'll leave some fresh clothes for you."

"No, there's no need for you to do that," I give him a half fake smile as I get off the bed and my head spins so bad, I almost topple. "I'll- I'll just uber home."

"Nandini, that was me being polite," He deadpans. "You smell so much of alcohol, you will give Chachi a heart attack if she sees you. You need a shower."

"Oh." My cheeks redden, aware of the vodka in my breath,

He chuckles, pointing at the bathroom again. "Go. I'll leave some clothes outside."

"Thanks," I mumble in response, basically running into the bathroom out of sheer embarrassment.

It was big, much like the one I and Manik shared in this house earlier, which also led to the sudden realisation that the room I had woken up in wasn't ours. Or maybe he remodelled it after I left, I wouldn't really know since I usually picked and dropped Mia from the door, and sometimes the living room. Never inside, because it hurt too much no matter how much the time passed.

I tried not thinking of that.

Instead, I bathed in Manik's caramel and coffee scented wash, taking my sweet time replacing the vodka smell by Manik's signature scent. I got out wearing a bathrobe to see a fresh pair of clothes on the bed and the door shut.

It had been a long, long time since I put on Manik's clothes, and I struggled with how big they looked on me as I waddled outside and downstairs. Even after folding the pyjama lengths and tightening it to fit my waist, and folding the arms of the shirt and tucking them inside, I still looked like, well, like I was wearing Manik's clothes. And I smelled like him.

And my heart melted when I walked down to see his back muscles flexed underneath his shirt as he cooked breakfast for us in the kitchen.

I had to clear my throat to get his attention. "You're here so soon? I figured you fell asleep in the bathroom again." He joked, his teasing dying midway when he turned around, freezing upon seeing me.

I squirm under his gaze's scrutiny, gulping. "Do you- Do you need any help?" God, I was behaving like a teenager at her crush's house. I needed to stop stammering. It wasn't my fault though; Manik and white shirts had always been my weakness.

"No. No." He tore his gaze away, taking a dish from the kitchen counter and placing it on the table. "Poha and..." he places a jar of juice. "Juice."

I smile at him. "You didn't have to, Manik. I would've just grabbed something at home."

"I did it for the hangover. Now, eat." He takes a place opposite me, and I take my share of poha in a plate.

The very first bite has me drooling. "Mm." I all but moan, "Manik, this is so good."

He gives me a lazy grin. "I know."

"Where did you learn to cook this good?"

"For Mia," he tells me, and I nod. That made sense.

Silence spreads between us, one that I felt obligated to break. "The room I woke up in... it was... different."

Manik looks up from his breakfast, surprised I asked. "It's not... our room."

"Oh." I reply, refusing to ask anything further.

"I closed our room after you left," He provided any way, "It hurt too much to stay there alone."

"It's been shut all these years?"

"Mm." He nodded.

I nod back in quiet acknowledgment. "You had mentioned a family holiday?"

"To Amms, yes."

The suspicion I had in me when he first mentioned it returned. Manik hated Amms. I think hated put it lightly. If Amms was plugged into the ventilator, Manik would remove the plug to charge his phone.

"I enquired, and I can take the first week of the next month off," I tell him. "It coincides with Mia's school break."

"Perfect," He rubs his hands together, and I wonder what was going on in the stupid mastermind's head. "I will book us tickets then."

I raise my shoulders. "Let me know what I owe you."

"Only your passport."

"I meant money," I replied softly.

"Only. Your. Passport." He repeats, emphasising on each word.

I gulp, focusing back at the remainder of my breakfast and so does he, eating the next few minutes in silence.

"Thank you," I say quietly when we're done, and I help clear the table. "For last night and for breakfast. What happened last night doesn't happen often, I hope you know that. Actually, it never happens. I just needed to..."

"Nandini..." He stops my little rant, forcing me to leave the dishes in the sink and look at him.

"Hm?"

"You're human. You needed a break. You don't need to explain that."

I give him a half smile. "It was also the date. I've never spent it alone, and I don't know, you know..?" I trail when I notice him staring at me confused, his eyebrows furrowed.

"What do you mean by date? What date was it yesterday?"

My heart drops. "It was the twenty-ninth yesterday, Manik."

"It was the twenty-eighth," he speaks gently, "Today is the twenty-ninth."

"Oh." I mumble, partly in disbelief I made the mistake and mostly in confusion. That never happens to me, ever– I'm not forgetful, and I'm not oblivious.

If anything, I'm always meticulous and careful.

"Happy wedding anniversary, Nandini," Manik gently whispers, as if afraid he was pushing me too far.

Thrown out of my thoughts, I just stare at him. "And happy separation anniversary, Manik."

"Ironic how the best and worst days of my life both fall on the same date."

"The worst? You wanted it, Manik." I barely murmured, tired of the shouting and the arguments and the fighting that all had the same thing at its heart- he willingly let me go, and I would never forgive him.

"I'm so fucking sorry, baby," he whispers back, taking a step towards me.

The sudden realisation hits. I was in his kitchen, in his clothes and I needed to stop before we make a mistake.

"I- I should go home." I take quick steps behind, looking anywhere but at him.

"Please stay, Nandini?" He pleads, "Just for today, please?"

"Why?" I force myself to look at him. "What would we even do?"

"Whatever you want to do," he announces. "We can watch a movie, those sappy kinds that you love. We can cook. We can call in food. We can paint. We can fight. We can do whatever you want. Just stay, please."

"And what if the only thing I want to do is leave?" I asked, staring into his eyes.

"Just stay anyway. Please." He begs in a whisper and I don't know what changed in my heart, but I decide to do that.

I stay.

* *

We truly did spend the morning watching sappy movies, and I got a fresh reminder of what a whiny baby Manik could become while hating on them.

We picked Mia up from her friend's house in the afternoon, who was nothing short of ecstatic that we had come together and taken her to Manik's house. She was so happy that when we asked her to eat a plate of a vegetables stew with her McDonalds take out, she agreed.

"I'm the shoe," Manik insisted as we lay on the floor with the Monopoly board between the three of us, and I rolled my eyes.

"Dad, when I and Mom okay, I am always the shoe."

"My house, my rules."

"Manik!" I scold, "She's a baby."

"She's four and a half. It's a decent time to learn what dibbs means."

"Dad, please!" Mia pouts with her puppy eyes, making Manik sigh.

"Fine. I guess I'll be the duck."

"I'm the duck," I swat his arm away, "You can be the horse."

Manik begrudgingly picks up the coin. "Because I chose last, I get a free out-of-jail card."

"Papa, it doesn't work that way," Mia bursts into fits of laughter and I chuckle too, shaking my head at the man-child.

The game lasted for over an hour. Mia gave up about ten minutes ago, and by gave up, I mean she got offended when Manik didn't give her the deal she wanted to make a hotel and jumped to my team. Despite having both our houses and money, I was still on the verge of losing.

"I can consider making this deal for just hundred dollars," Manik bargained, watching as my eyes shone at the prospect of still having a chance at winning. "If you give me a kiss."

My mouth hung low, and Mia covered her mouth and laughed.

"That's cheating!"

"All's fair in game and war." He teased.

"I'm pretty sure it's love," I glared.

"Are you saying this is love?"

"I am saying you're a cheater."

"Mia, am I cheating?" Manik turns to his daughter who shakes her head, clearly enjoying this little show a little too much.

"Mama, a deal is a deal," she tells me while battling her eyelashes, quickly jumping from my side to Manik's.

"Traitor," I eye her and then Manik. "Fifty dollars and a hug."

"Seventy five dollars and a kiss."

"Sixty dollars."

"And a kiss."

"Deal," I reluctantly agree.

He grins. "I would've given it for free and a kiss if you would've asked."

"That was an option?" I deadpan while removing his house from the said area, putting mine and then adding the said amount to the bank to make a hotel there.

Despite my desperate (and best) efforts, I lost and Manik won. The deal was, the loser had to cook and so I did, a quick chicken spaghetti while the father-daughter duo watched cartoons in the living room.

As I carried the dish back to the dining table, I didn't miss the view in front of me, wondering if I had been too impulsive in rejecting Manik. Not that I wanted to go running into his arms, but rejecting Manik meant denying Mia the comfort of her entire family and love of her father on weekdays.

When we separated, she was a toddler, not understanding why she lived with me on weekdays and her father on weekends. Now she was growing up, and she saw her friends having such family time all the time, I know she wondered why she didn't get to have that.

But, I couldn't just forget all the hurt that Manik had caused me and her in a heartbeat.

So I kept my thoughts to myself, not wanting to take an impulsive decision based on fleeting emotions.

We had dinner while Mia ranted about her day at her friends' house, and we settled on watching a princess movie while eating ice cream after dinner, during which Mia fell asleep cuddled between me and Manik.

He carried her upstairs to his bed, the one I had woken up in, and I followed them there.

"She looked so happy today," I said quietly while covering her with a blanket, sighing at my sleeping baby.

"We should do this more often, no?" Manik agreed, and I nodded.

Once Manik had kept pillows on both sides of her (despite me reassuring him it wasn't needed, she was turning five in a few months), he turned to me.

"So...?" He trailed.

"So?" I repeated. "Don't tell me you're kicking me out. That's considered impolite, especially since you invited me."

He chuckled. "I'm not kicking you out, baby."

"Manik.." I said in a warning tone.

"I know. I know. I shouldn't call you baby anymore." He mocked, walking towards my side of the bed and I meet him midway. "I believe I was promised a kiss."

My eyebrows knit as I tilt my head to look at him, concealing a smile. "I believe you cheated your way to a kiss."

He smirked. "Deal's a deal. Pay up now."

"Close your eyes."

"Nandini, we were married. Do I have to remind you how Mia was made?"

I glared at him. "You want a kiss or not?"

"Fine," He huffs, closing his eyes nonetheless and bending his face to my level.

I stare at him for a moment, the mole on his face, the stubble he had begun keeping, his hair a little shorter than his crazy college rockstar days. He looked different from the man I had once fallen in love with, but somehow still felt the same.

I place a kiss on his cheek, and even though I wanted it to be chaste, I couldn't help but linger for a moment too long.

When I pulled away, I expected him to complain just about as soon as he opened his eyes, so I immediately defended myself, "A kiss is a kiss. You never specified where."

"I know." The smile that spread on his lips was precious, the corner of his cheeks tinting red.

I think I just made Manik Malhotra blush.

"It's late, don't you think?" He whispered slightly in daze. "Let's sleep?"

"Here?" I ask, confused.

"I have like six other rooms in the house. We can sleep anywhere you want, baby, but I assumed you would want to be next to our Mia."

Every sense of logic in me wanted me to protest- to him calling me baby, to him implying we should sleep in the same room voluntarily, but just for one day, I wanted to let my heart win. "I do," I agreed softly, making my way back to one side of Mia and getting into the covers, watching as Manik got in from the other side.

I kept a hand on my baby girl, watching as Manik switched off the lamp in the room.

My breath froze when his hand found mine over Mia in the darkness, his fingers lacing with mine.

Once again, I knew the right thing was to pull away.

Once again, I didn't.

I let myself pretend that our past didn't exist, that it was okay for my heart to win over my head just for this one day.

I knew the butterflies in my stomach and the comfort and warmth I found from his mere touch could exist just for today, and this is where I had to draw the line between us.

If he found out about the secrets I was hiding, I would be the one to hurt him this time. And irreparably so.

The light at the tunnel is a runaway train,
The stars that we wished on are only airplanes,
The love that we're chasin' is a heartbreak away,
'Cause we're picture perfect
in a broken frame.

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