the club was loud, the kind of loud that made everything feel distant. the beat thrummed through the walls, into the floor, and up into hongjoong's chest like a second heartbeat. lights flickered in strobes of blue and pink and red, painting the faces of strangers in flashes. everything felt like it was spinning just a little off center, and hongjoong was not sure if it was the alcohol or something deeper.

he leaned heavily on the bar, cheeks flushed, fingers wrapped clumsily around his fourth drink. wooyoung was dancing nearby, dragging yeosang into a lazy two-step while yelling over the music about how they had to request something more dramatic.

hongjoong was not really listening. he was smiling, maybe even laughing, but it did not feel like it belonged to him.

"you doing okay?" yeosang asked, appearing beside him again with a small furrow in his brow. he had to lean close just to be heard.

"i'm drunk," hongjoong replied, a bit too cheerfully. "so, yeah. i'm great."

yeosang did not look convinced. "don't let wooyoung make you take another shot."

"what if i want another shot?" hongjoong replied cheekily.

"then i'll tell the bartender to give you water." yeosang said sternly.

"rude." hongjoong rolled his eyes.

yeosang raised a brow. "necessary."

but hongjoong was already turning away, scanning the crowd without thinking. it was habit now, to search for something, or someone.

his eyes wandered for a while, picking up on the sweaty bodies dancing with little to no rhythm. everyone seemed to be having the time of their life. hongjoong wished he could be as free as them, as happy as everyone else seemed.

but suddenly, he saw him. the very person who was making him feel so down.

seonghwa.

time froze, just for a second. his brain had stopped keeping up. all he could register was the figure in the dim light; black button-up shirt, soft hair falling slightly over his eyes, a hand wrapped around a drink like he was holding onto it for stability.

hongjoong blinked. once. twice. like if he did it enough, seonghwa would disappear. like he had imagined him, just another ghost conjured by too much tequila and too many memories.

but seonghwa was real. standing across the club, laughing softly at something his friend whispered in his ear. his smile was faint, tired around the edges, but it was there.

and then their eyes met.

just like that, the breath caught in hongjoong's throat. all the air left his lungs and everything inside him pulled tight.

seonghwa froze too, his smile fading into something unreadable. for a moment, neither of them moved. the club kept going around them, a blur of strangers and neon, but they stood still. two people locked in place by something that still had not let go, no matter how hard they both tried to walk away.

"uh-oh," wooyoung said behind hongjoong, voice slightly slurred. "tell me i'm imagining this."

yeosang followed his gaze. "you're not."

"should we... like, go over there? or pretend we don't see them?" wooyoung asked hesitantly.

hongjoong did not answer. he was still staring, blinking like he could memorize every detail from this distance.

seonghwa looked good. too good. heartbreak should not look that soft.

and hongjoong... well, hongjoong was a mess.

"he looks... okay," hongjoong muttered, mostly to himself. "he looks okay."

"you don't," yeosang said gently.

"that's the point," hongjoong replied with a crooked smile, though his voice cracked at the end.

meanwhile, across the room, seonghwa could not believe what he was seeing.

"hongjoong's here," he said quietly, almost too quiet to hear.

"you said hongjoong?" yunho asked in disbelief. "i thought he was a homebody?"

"he is, but he's with his coworkers. they must've somehow convinced him to come out tonight," seonghwa said as he continued to stare at the man across the room, finding it hard to take his eyes off hongjoong.

jongho leaned into seonghwa's shoulder. "we can leave, you know, if it's too much for you. just say the word."

"no," seonghwa whispered, eyes still locked on hongjoong. "it's fine."

"doesn't look like it," mingi responded, concerned for his friend.

"i just... i didn't expect to see him. it's fine to stay," seonghwa responded, but san could tell his friend was not being honest.

he placed a hand on seonghwa's back, steady and warm. "we don't have to stay if you don't want to. we can head out and go get fries. no drama. just fries."

seonghwa let out a breath and finally broke eye contact. it felt like cutting something open again.

"let's wait a little longer," he said quietly. "i'm okay."

they lingered for another half hour, staying mostly tucked into their corner, letting the music wash over them. seonghwa did not look again, at least not directly. but he felt hongjoong's gaze like a pulse on his skin. it clung to him, unwavering, like it knew exactly where the fault lines were.

the music shifted. suddenly it was slower, deeper, something with a beat that made the air throb. someone from his group tugged him toward the dance floor. he almost refused. almost said no. but something in his chest ached too loud to ignore.

so he let himself be pulled in.

seonghwa did not dance much. just moved a little, enough to not stand out. the lights blinked in shades of red and violet and gold. bodies brushed against his. somewhere nearby, mingi was laughing, and san was singing the wrong lyrics too loudly, but seonghwa was not really present.

across the room, hongjoong had drifted toward the edge of the crowd, maybe to hide, maybe to breathe. but then he, too, stepped into it, slow and hesitant, like the floor might give out beneath him.

they never touched. never spoke. did not even come close enough to call it an accident.

but they danced. near each other, not together. the same rhythm tugged at both of them, even if they moved like they were alone. like no one was watching. like they could not feel the other burning just a few feet away.

seonghwa's hand lifted once, brushing through his hair as he turned, and hongjoong's eyes followed the motion like gravity. hongjoong shifted his weight, hips barely swaying, his head tilted down like he was thinking of something else entirely.

they were both elsewhere and here, haunted by the same memories in different bodies. ghosts moving to a song that meant nothing and everything.

their eyes met only once more, in a strobe of blue light, a glance so quick it might have been a trick of the room. but it landed. seonghwa's lips parted like he had been caught breathing. he looked away, jaw tight.

and then, like waking up from a dream he had not meant to slip into, seonghwa slowed to stillness. the music kept playing, but he stopped.

san noticed. nudged him gently, a question in his eyes.

this time, seonghwa nodded.

they slipped out of the crowd as quietly as they had arrived. no goodbyes, no glances back. just the sound of the door closing behind them and the night swallowing them whole.

hongjoong watched them go. he had not moved the whole time.

"he left," yeosang said again, quieter this time.

"yeah," hongjoong murmured. "i noticed."

wooyoung came to stand beside him, leaning his weight against the bar. "you okay?"

hongjoong did not reply. just stared at the door like it might open again.

"don't do anything dumb," wooyoung said, trying to keep it light.

hongjoong laughed. it was short and hollow. "too late."

yeosang sighed. "joong..."

"i think—" hongjoong swayed slightly, gripping the edge of the bar. "i think i'm gonna go see him."

both boys froze.

"wait, what?" wooyoung asked, his voice rising just enough to catch attention.

"tonight?" yeosang asked, blinking. "you're drunk."

"exactly," hongjoong slurred, stumbling slightly as he pulled out his phone. "which means i have... courage."

"no, it means you have no filter," wooyoung corrected. "which is very different."

hongjoong was not listening anymore. his eyes were glazed, but determined in that stupid, emotional way that always meant trouble.

"i need to talk to him," he mumbled, mostly to himself. "i need to tell him something. anything. i don't even know what. i just... i miss him."

"you're going to show up at his apartment wasted?" yeosang asked, trying not to sound alarmed.

hongjoong looked down at his phone, thumb hovering over the screen. "i just want him to know... i didn't let go because i stopped liking him."

wooyoung sighed, softer this time. "then maybe wait until you're sober to say that."

but hongjoong was already walking away, weaving through the crowd with a mission in his step and regret clinging to his skin like sweat.

maybe it was a mistake. maybe it would make everything worse.

but hongjoong was willing to test his luck.

ooooooooo

-vic