The wind was slightly cold, progressing to chilly as the sun decided to hide. The clouds were swirling, playing on the field of their own. The Venus that blinked just before the dawn, stayed a while longer as if it knew he won't be needed soon.

"Arg..." His voice was husky like the morning groan after the rough night. The curtains fluttered the wind inside and brushed against his shell. The indication was enough for him to get up and wrap the thin duvet around his naked body. He marched straight to the bathroom to wash away the soreness.

"Ngn. What's with this headache?" When he sat at the coffee table, he realized how empty the room had become. Though his brother was rarely with him, Wang Yibo made sure to keep his room clean and warm.

"2 years huh?" Wang Yibo mumbled and sipped the coffee as the clock ticked by. He closed his eyes and massaged the bridge of his nose. Yesterday event replayed in his mind. He never thought, he would be talking about his nightmares aloud. And now they had sentenced his brother for 2 years.

"I failed to nullify the contract..." Wang Yibo said absent mindedly. He got up and went to get the first aid box. He searched for pain reliver, for his increasingly banging headache.

If Wang An had not committed suicide, they might have found some more time to look for the contract between Liu Huai Kuan and Zi Teng Huang. But If he hadn't committed suicide, the brothers would also be trapped for a long time.

Defense alone, can't give you victory. To win a battle, one must attack.

Wang Yibo wasn't even aware what was written in the contract and his brother didn't share the details either. Since when did they become so distant?

"Tch." Wang Yibo clicked his tongue when he learnt that he was out of pain killers. He looked at the watch and it was still 10 in the morning. There were 2 hours before the last trial begins.

He went to the sofa and lied on it. He had taken the coffee – he won't be falling asleep again. But he could get rest before it got worst. He pressed his hand against his wrist to measure his heartbeat, and sure enough he was feverish.

The yesterday's confession had a toil on him and he was sure not just him.

"Should I call him?" he wondered. What would Xiao Zhan be feeling right now? He didn't show any particular changes after learning about his identity. Did he really misunderstand?

Or maybe he was waiting for Wang Yibo, to tell him, himself.

Wang Yibo pulled out his ox necklace. There was a time, he used to believe that he couldn't live a single day without Xiao Zhan. But he did. He managed to survive 3 years without him.

Those years were enough of punishment for not being able to protect his love, for killing his own family, for taking the life of an innocent child – for his various crimes.

Without the rain, or left out by the sun, love is a seed that needs only hearts to grow.

At the strike of half past 11, Wang Yibo got up from the couch. Surprisingly he did get a wink, enough to reduce his headache, but it wasn't completely gone. He put on his clothes, took his keys, locked the door and went out for the trial that will be the last dart at their board.

He arrived 10 minutes prior to the trial, most people were already present. Wang Yibo searched for the only owner of his heart and sure enough, he was sitting with his sister and his uncle by his side.

This time around, he didn't have to sit with the defendant's side. He had been proved alibi and he was going to sit in the same lane as Xiao Zhan. His heart felt the excitement and the sparks, like how he used to feel when their love was young.

Discreetly, Wang Yibo went and sat at the backmost seat of the victim's side. He chose an angle where he would be able to see Xiao Zhan without any hinderance.

He watched the love of his life, indulging in conversation with his family. He watched his beloved smiling to his uncle's joke. He watched his dearest, looking around at the entrance door again and again.

"Are you looking for me?" Wang Yibo whispered to himself. Even if Xiao Zhan wasn't looking for him, Wang Yibo was allowed to think that way, he was allowed to feel the swells of joy around his heart. He was allowed to be happy.

The small whispers come to a stop when the superior court judge – Yang Xia arrived. Followed by her 3 assistant commissioner. Wang Yibo had to admit, she had the aura of an alpha.

"Good Afternoon, ladies and gentleman. Certainly glad you could all make it today as well. Today will be the last day of the trial and you have been all a wonderful jury and your participation does your credit. This is a Civil Service you've been doing. This is an amenity for your country. I hope after this none of you have to face this kind of situation ever again. But if you do, you can reach out to attorney – their numbers are on the blue pages."

As if it was the que, everyone looked at the files that had been placed on the tables at front.

"Miss Lin, is everyone present?" Yang Xia asked her assistant; who was already standing at the lectern.

"Mr. Wang Zhuocheng isn't here yet..." Lin Chenxi said looking at the empty seat.

"Something tells me, he won't be coming either." Yang Xia joked.

Wang Yibo would also attest to that, knowing how he lashed out yesterday, he might be digging out information to prove his brother's innocence.

His brother wasn't alone. He has found his happiness.

"Alright everyone should we proceed?" Yang Xia asked the jury. Wang Yibo could tell how Xiao Zhan got nervous. He observed his shoulder going tense. He wasn't in any better condition either. His head begun to pound again.

"Are you okay?" a voice from front called.

"Mn." Wang Yibo replied.

"So, what was his reaction?"

"Apparently nothing."

"...It feels like he's trying to understand everyone's perspective now. Don't give him too much stress, it's not good for his heart."

"You said he has no heart ailments, Dr. Meng!" Wang Yibo almost shouted in panic. Meng Ziyi was sitting in the front row. From the Wens, Zhang Bin – the head of the family, Wang Rong – first son of Xiu Qing and Meng Ziyi had arrived.

"He doesn't! Relax!" Meng Ziyi immediately assured. She further added, "I'm worried about you here. You have been neglecting your health too much."

"I don't have the time to –"

"If you get sick, that would give him stress."

"..."

In amidst of their silent conversation, they missed the announcement when Yang Xia called Xiu Qing for the trail.

He didn't see him coming!

Wang Yibo immediately looked at Xiao Zhan. He could guess by the pattern of his movements that Xiao Zhan had been taking deep breaths to keep himself from panicking.

Wang Yibo almost got up and went to him but when he saw Song Jiyang patting his back and Xuan Lu holding his hands, he decided otherwise.

He has his whole family behind him.

A man in his late 40s came inside the courtroom with 2 court police behind him. His stride was so confidence, that it didn't look like he was the criminal. His eerie eyes stared straight at the judge, translating no fear. While the smirk on his face, it gave uneasy feeling to everyone around.

"So many came!" He brightened up, seeing a gathering after a long time.

"Oh! Father you came too. A-Rong, it's been a long time huh? You have grown too much." He directed at the Wen family, but Zhang Bin simply ignored him. Wang Rong on the other hand was on the verge of tears. He hadn't seen his father for so many years.

"Why are you sitting so far away? Come sit with me." Xiu Qing said when he realized there was only Liu Dao Min sitting on the defendants' side.

Wang Rong was about to move but Zhang Bin stopped him.

"I'm going to sit over there." Meng Ziyi informed Wang Yibo and went to sit on the defendants' side. Wang Rong followed. Zhang Bin was furious, but he didn't let it show on his face.

"Oh A-Zi, you came too." Xiu Qing asked mused but before Meng Ziyi could respond, they all heard the voice from Yang Xia.

"If you're done greeting your relatives, please take a seat so we can proceed."

Meng Ziyi and Wang Rong followed as directed but Xiu Qing – the smirk on his only grew wider and he said,

"I already know what the verdict is going to be. I already know you're going to punish me."

Not only him, the whole court knew.

"Why bother with formalities when we can skip to the sentencing? Everyone took some time from their busy lives, do them justice."

This time Lin Chenxi was quick to response, "We will do justice that's why we are going to hear your part of the story –"

"My part of the story?" Xiu Qing laughed delightedly. "I am not going to defend myself. I stand by what I believe. Those who can't see are the ones in wrong."

Who's the real fool? The ones who laugh at you or the one they're laughing at?

He chuckled darkly, "Civil service? You think you're helping society? Hahaha." Xiu Qing swayed as he laughed. Laughed at the thoughts the humans carried.

They stomp on each other, pull off their skins, stab them and blame fate for it?

Xiu Qing went as far as court police allowed him, his expression turned grim as he stated the cold facts,

"Where was that Civil Service when this case had been mute for a decade?"

The whole court turned silent. Even the wind held its breath.

"Shen Xiao Hai had a lot of chunk in his pockets. When the money is on the table, humans are quick to change their morals."

We are each our own devil that makes the world our own hell.

It felt like the trial had already begun before the actual trial but this one didn't need evidence to expose the candor of the human nature.

"Mr. Xiu Qing. Please maintain the order and take your seat." Yang Xia said in her autorotative voice and everyone who had been stunned silent before, finally let out their breaths.

The court police dragged him back and made him sit on the seat.

"You can make me shut up but how will you silent the truth?" Xiu Qing said before sitting.

The tension his words brought to the jury, made them own realize a battle they had been fighting. The atmosphere kept growing colder and colder as the trial progressed.

"You had a good life, a respectable job and supportive family. May I ask what made you follow...Mr. Xiu Qing?" Lin Chenxi asked the culprit on the podium.

Liu Dao Min was the doctor who helped Xiu Qing with his lab. The two of them had experimented on a lot of things, which had been considered a taboo by the government.

"I believe in his vision." Came a simple reply.

"What vison are you talking about?" Lin Chenxi asked unsure.

"The same vision, you're all afraid of."

The weapon could be subdue, but not the knowledge.

"Does your vision include following the same paths you condemn?"

It was voice they never knew he would hear. Xiao Zhan stood up from his seat and called the man in the podium. Everyone was wonderstruck by him taking the initiative.

It evoked a ripple of bizarre laughter from the madman.

"Hahahaha Xiao Zhan oh Xiao Zhan, I knew you were special." Xiu Qing also got up in response to him. He landed his mused gaze on the young man. Xiao Zhan looked straight ahead, he felt the gaze but he didn't falter either.

"You're right. I might be following the same path. But unlike them I am not afraid to acknowledge what I do." Xiu Qing turned his eyes towards Wang Yibo sitting in the back. A warning he gave,

"They will be curious first. They will simply ask you few questions. Then they would ask you for blood samples and it won't take long before they guilt trip you and decide to experiment on you."

He turned his gaze back to Xiao Zhan and added,

"You are the only test subject that allowed me to fulfill my vision after all."

Xiao Zhan felt his body going numb, while feeling chills. Song Jiyang stood up and blocked his vision while Xuan lu made him sit down.

At the moment, people who were not aware of, all came to know about Xiao Zhan's condition.

Xiao Zhan could bear children.

The families might not say a thing but the people at court? Who could mark their words?

It's the gossip that always feed the curious minds.

"Mr. Xiu Qing has already confessed his crimes, Miss Yang Xia I don't see what's stopping the verdict." Her voice was calm like the freshly bloom lotus but her gaze carried meaning. Xuan Lu emphasized the order, they all had been neglecting.

It took Yang Xia a moment to realize and she broke out of stupor to address the jury.

"Very well, Is jury in favor to hear the verdict now?" Yang Xia asked. Lin Chenxi still had few questions to ask but at this point it all felt pointless.

A hand was raised among the jury and everyone looked at the person. He was directed at the podium and he asked,

"I want to ask, did you take Yibo with you...when we fell from the stairs?" Xiao Zhan asked a question no body gave the answer for.

The white snow dyed in red, the flushed skin drying out and plump lips growing cold. That was the last memory, Xiao Zhan had of Wang Yibo before he fell into coma. It was the agony his heart pumped.

Wang Yibo looked at Xiao Zhan in horror. He should be happy that Xiao Zhan cared but it felt him with dread. His head begun to throb even more.

"I did." Xiu Qing smiled.

.

.

.

[Flash back]

Amidst of white, two faint breaths were losing waves. Their intertwined hands grew cold replicating the chilly weather around them. The two lovers remained on the icy ground as the snow created a grave for them.

Even the red of blood was losing warmth every second and next few moments would be the last of breath they might produce.

In the near distance, the two men struggled as they engaged in a fight. One was trying to keep the other away while the other was fighting to get to the two bodies laying on the dyed snow.

"Are you helping him because he bailed you out?" Xiu Qing shouted at the young man that held him back from the two bodies.

"I'm helping them because you're my father!!" He Peng yelled back. "You're the cause of their misery!" And those were his friends. Those were the people He Peng wished to be friends with.

"Let go of me!!!" Xiu Qing grappled the seed he himself planted. "They will die if you don't let me see them!"

Who was the saint? The angel who showed up in the mist or the reaper who carried him out of the haze.

"Its better to die than to live suffering!"

Xiu Qing stopped abruptly and looked at his son. His words had broken the last of restraint he had on him.

"You're right. It's better to die than to live suffering." He said and injected a big needle in He Peng.

"Arg.." He didn't mind if the needle landed on the vein or not. He simply needed to end things.

He Peng felt his world spinning around and he fell on the snowy ground. He saw how his father made his way to Xiao Zhan. He saw how his father checked his veins. He saw how his father caressed his stomach.

He crawled up, struggled to stand and limped till he went to Xiu Qing. He wanted to push him away but the drug caused him to stagger and fall again. Just as Xiu Qing was about to carry Xiao Zhan away. A man came and hit him hard on the head.

"...Xuan." He Peng lost consciousness.

When He Peng woke up again, he found himself in a hospital. He tried to get up, but the room seemed to spin.

"Keep lying." Came a voice from his right side. He Peng lied down and turned his head to see the person and it was his friend.

"XuanXuan..." He Peng whispered. He closed his eyes to remember why was he in the hospital, when he abruptly got up and startled Hao Xuan.

"ZhanZhan and Yibo!"

"Lie down!" Hao Xuan urged him back. To ease him, he revealed, "They're both...alive."

He Peng let the words sink and realized something. "My father got them?"

Wang Hao Xuan let out a shaky breath, he fiddled with his thumb and felt his shoulders getting tensed.

"Zi Teng Huang was there..."

He had been hiding and watching from the shadows. He was not going to let the chance escape where he could get Yibo.

"How did you rescue us?" He Peng asked.

"FengFeng came. We could only save the two of you..."

Wang Hao Xuan looked at his friend, the tubed were tangled all over his body. Wang Yibo had been dyed in red while Xiao Zhan refused to wake up.

"It took an instant...just few minutes and I almost lost all of you." Hao Xuan let out a bitter cry. His friends nearly died right in front of his eyes.

He Peng felt the depth of those words. They had been trying to protect Xiao Zhan for years now. He had been trying to tame the storm by themselves.

It really take just an instant for a person to stop breathing. To turn the living into dead.

"They called Huai Kuan back from Japan. For now, we can trust him to protect Yibo." Hao Xuan said.

He Peng looked at the ceiling. The empty roof was perfect contradiction of his thoughts.

"My father, he really tried to kill me?"

"..." Wang Hao Xuan couldn't seem to find words to answer that question. He Peng laughed at the lose of false hope he had giving himself.

"I've been over myself..." He smiled a teary smile and let this be the final heart break of his life.

"How long before I can see Xiao Zhan? I think he misunderstood something. We need to get him and Yibo back together." He Peng said wiping that lonely tear.

"..." Hao Xuan only looked down and let the tears run lose. That little gesture divulged the dire situation they were in. He Peng understood that and closed his eyes to rest.

[Flashback ends]

"I had both Lan brothers with me or more precise, Zi Teng held them with him." Xiu Qing disclosed.

"Why? What did he do to them?" Xiao Zhan bravely asked.

"You probably don't know what was written in the contract, do you?" Xiu Qing asked.

Not even Wang Yibo knew of that.

Xiu Qing rubbed his chin for a while, he shrugged his shoulders and revealed.

"He wanted to revive the woman he loved."

The boundary of life and death, it wasn't small feat to achieve.

Proudly Xiu Qing flaunted his knowledge and research he did over the years,

"You probably know of Dolly the sheep? She was cloned by a single cell. That was exactly what I was trying to achieve."

How many lives could that process save? Maybe the people with failed organs could get their organs cloned. There would be no esurient of donors. And if that turned out successful, maybe a day would come when even dead could be cloned.

"But the issue was, she had been dead for years. We needed living cells. On top of the chemicals Zi Teng used to preserve her body damaged her biological code."

Xiu Qing looked at Wang Yibo and said without remorse,

"We tried to kill Yibo – to get the copy of his genetic code. We just needed to take out the cipher which matched his mother's." Xiu Qing cackled

"It is beyond me, how that son of mine was able to save him everything." He looked at Yang Xia and said, "To keep Yibo alive and prevent Zi Teng from experimenting on him. Huai Kuan offered himself up. He became a victim willingly. That's why they couldn't nullify the contract."

They thought atmosphere was cold before. With each reveal a new thunder struck on top of their heads.

How could there possibly be justice at what the evil brought.

"Why? Why did you do it son? What we didn't give you? We've treated you so kindly. You were raised in luxury. We gave you the best. All of my children were treated equally then why?"

Zhang Bin stood up. He remembered the day when his son Xiu Qing was born like it was yesterday. He had many surgeries to perform that day. He tried to clear his schedule, but he didn't find it in him to neglect other sorrow for his own happiness.

The moment he was done with it, he rushed to the gynecologist ward and cried at the sight of his wife holding his precious son. It was his first child after all.

Even at the young age, Xiu Qing had the different approach of things compared to others. He did things differently. Zhang Bin was sure that when his son grow up, he would be like those men; who are mentioned in history books.

The horror dawned on him when he saw how his son dissected a cat. He tried to talk him out of it, but his reply made him spellbound.

'Father, that cat had a broken leg. I simply used his tail to make a new one.'

One after another, Xiu Qing experimented with animals. His methods were revolutionary. He was saving them in his own ways.

Even the history is proof of that, humans are afraid of change.

"Hahahaha equality?" Xiu Qing laughed at his father's remark.

All men are created equal he had learnt. But the time he spent in asylum taught him otherwise.

"Some are born with power. Some with knowledge. Some carry golden spoon while others can't even afford a crumb. The blacks are cursed while the whites rule." He looked at everyone in the court with stern expression.

"The very existence of humans is discrimination. On what grounds can you prevent this war?"

There are worthless things, but no things are meaningless.

Once again, he managed to leave them all tongue tied. They held no answer for his questions. They had no sight for his vision. But things could have been different. He didn't have to take the dark path to speak the truth.

"Please your honor, announce the verdict." Zhang Bin said lowering his head. Everyone had held their heartbeats. They could guess the verdict. But now they doubted their own thoughts.

"Miss Lin." Yang Xia passed the paper to Lin Chenxi and she immediately took it and announced the verdict before Xiu Qing could say another thing.

"As to charge in the court, on we the jury find defendant Xiu Qing and Liu Dao Min guilty of Homicide charged in indictment."

Yang Xia then took over and announced the sentencing.

"I'm going to adjudicate Mr. Liu Dao Min guilty and sentence him prison for a life-time." She then turned over another paper and announced, "Adding the medical report of Xiu Qing, until the hospital gives a positive response. His sentencing would be delayed. But I am going to adjudicate him prison for a life-time as well."

"Treatment? Prison for a life-time? Don't fool yourself believing you're being kind to my showing mercy. This defeat has caused my vision, I don't need an empty existence." Xiu Qing said and snatched away the gun from the closest court police.

Everyone became alert.

"You're even afraid to charge a valid punishment? The fear truly reveals the inner skin." Xiu Qing played with the gun which he had directed straight at Xiao Zhan.

Everyone felt their throats go dry.

Wang Yibo quickly came in forth and stood in front of Xiao Zhan. The gun was now facing him.

"How similar you are to your uncle. He too was a fool in love."

And the sound of the gun shot rang the halls.

...

The little drops of water puddled as it started to rain. The clouds had been giving warning since the morning, but few heeded. And now sparks of lightening could be seen seldomly.

"Are you still afraid of the dark?" contrary to the gloomy sky, the voice was calm and serene like the tunes of fine zither.

"Not anymore." He replied. It felt like yesterday when the storm begun but sky was going to be clear soon and only the rays of sun will shine through.

The droplets gave birth to the sound of splash and ripples when it hit the shade they were sitting under for shelter. There was in fact a coffee shop nearby, subconsciously the two wanted to face the storm together and moved on.

"What about bugs? Are you still afraid of them?" Xiao Zhan asked a different question.

There are two types of phobia: one, which is due to traumatic event. Incase of Wang Yibo, he had been locked inside the dark room by his uncle too many times till it became serious fear.

The other type is the kind of fear, a person develops subconsciously. Like Wang Yibo's fear of bugs. Even the person himself might not be aware of the cause. It is harder to identify but once the caused is figured out. The rest is the mind game.

"My only fear is, losing you again."

The wind was impregnated with the aroma of the sweet potatoes from the next street. The drizzle was perfect, a serene weather for couples. Xiao Zhan hummed to that, considering it – acknowledging it.

He too has been afraid.

"I'm sorry."

"Hmm?" Xiao Zhan turned his head around. The younger was looking down. He played with his fingers.

"I'm sorry for hiding from you." He apologized. He was gravely aware of the situation if things got out of hand, it would have given Xiao Zhan another panic attack, it would have added another layer of distrust, but he couldn't leave him alone. He couldn't let him die.

"Not even once, I noticed you were in pain. Not for a second, I was able to see how broken you were." Xiao Zhan confessed. How many years they had spent together? How many years they stayed under the same roof? Was he the poor judge at character or was Wang Yibo simply good at hiding his scars?

"You too. You always had that smile on your face. If I didn't know better, you'd have fooled me." Wang Yibo professed.

Never really showing your pain, was it for the sake of others or they just couldn't say.

"Were we really together?" Xiao Zhan chuckled, humorless. Was it love if he couldn't really know the heart of his person? At this point, what was even love?

What Xiu Qing had said left a deep impression on both of them. He died but his words would forever ring in their ears.

Xiao Zhan asked.

"Your brother...is there really no way to nullify the contract?"

"He has Zhuocheng with him. I'm sure he will find a way."

Xiao Zhan turned his face towards younger and latter was looking at him too, intently. He felt a little embarrassed and quickly turned his face forward.

"A-are they together?"

"They were dating for a while. From how Zhuocheng reacted in the court, it's possible they are still dating."

"It looks like there are more to people I didn't know." Xiao Zhan said looking in the distance. There were children jumping in the puddles and splashing water on each other.

"We can only know, how much a person wants us to show." Wang Yibo said. "Zhan-ge, I won't be hiding a thing from you now on. What happened in the past happened. I made mistakes. I left you alone. I hurt you. I –"

"Wang Yibo! I do not want to go down there...Can't we forget it all?"

He wants to forget it?

It chipped down remaining parts of his heart, which he had put together so carefully before. Had he hopped too much? How could he be so insensitive?

"D-does that mean, you won't do hypnosis anymore?" He was unsure at this point. Does Xiao Zhan no longer wish to remember him? To remember them?

He did betray him. He didn't even respond to his apology before.

"Why would I need to go through hypnosis? Aren't you with me now?"

He looked up at Xiao Zhan, trying to decipher those meanings, he didn't want to misunderstand again. Xiao Zhan seemed to recognize his inner turmoil. He smiled and pulled out something from his pocket.

"Let's make new memories together hm?."

And the goat necklace hung in his hands.

"Y-you...H-how?"

He had the symbol of their love. The oath of their hearts. Wang Yibo felt the tears sting his eyes.

"I looked for it everywhere in the Jiang mansion." He thought if he found the necklace, he would remember his beloved. He would remember that his love wasn't a hallucination to escape his nightmares. His love was real – his love was Wang Yibo.

"Jiyang Shushu had been holding on to it for me." Xiao Zhan said with a smile and the next moment he found himself in an embrace.

"Thank you! Thank you! Zhan-ge!"

"Look at you crying like a baby, little start." Xiao Zhan teased, he wanted to get the old reaction like before. He wanted to reimagine those glories, but he felt nothing.

In fact, he felt heavy when another weight was added on him.

"Yibo?" Xiao Zhan nudged the blob of meat on top of him. Aside from the sound of breathing, nothing came out of him.

"Yibo, move you're heavy." Xiao Zhan called again but no response. Just as Xiao Zhan pushed Wang Yibo, instead of sitting on his spot, he fell down on the wet ground.

"Wang Yibo!!!"

The little star had dimmed out.

----------------

This story is coming to an end soon. If there is any mental health topic you want me to discuss about, don't be shy to comment. If you're still shy, drop me a dm.

(don't feel abandoned if I don't reply on time)

 CLNighters  offers their helpline to support you all.
If you want to cry, vent or simply talk, don't hesitate. 

If there are people who abandoned you, there will naturally be people who will offer you hand.

There are worthless things but there are no meaningless things – Kirei Kotomine

"We are each our devil and make this world our hell." Oscar Wilde

Sorry for errors and thank you for reading.