{I keep forgetting Tulip's personality--}

Betty: I’ve done a lot of dumb stuff.

Mara: I witnessed the dumb stuff.

Mouse: I recorded the dumb stuff.

Tulip: I joined you in the dumb stuff.

Mint: I TRIED TO STOP YOU FROM DOING THE DUMB STUFF!

∆∆∆∆

[The squad is at a dinner party but someone has been murdered,]

Mouse: You’re acting pretty carefree for someone who’s life’s at stake. Who’s to say you aren’t the killer?

Mint: It’s a murder, not a tax audit. I’ll be fine.

Betty: What about Mouse? Nobody ever suspects her!

Mouse: Well what about Mara? She has a gun!

Mara: Tulip has a knife.

Tulip: Yeah, for fun, not for murder! [Stabs Betty in the arm,]

Betty: [Cupcake moan,] EEÆÆH~~!

∆∆∆∆

Mouse: What makes you all smile?

Mara: Friends and Family.

Mint: Snacks.

Betty: Victory and success.

Tulip: Face muscles.

∆∆∆∆

Mara: Who the hell broke the toaster?

Betty: It was Tulip.

Mint: It was Tulip.

Mouse: Tulip broke it.

Tulip:

Tulip: ...yA'LL PROMISED--

∆∆∆∆

Betty: So oxygen went on a date with potassium, it went... OK.

Tulip: I thought oxygen was dating magnesium, OMG.

Betty: Actually oxygen first asked nitrogen out, but nitrogen was all like NO.

Mouse: I thought oxygen had that double bond with the hydrogen twins.

Mara: Looks like someone's a HO.

Tulip: NaBrO.

Mint: I'm done with all of you!

∆∆∆∆

Mara: Tulip is late again.

Betty: How did this happen? I called them at 8 o’clock this morning and pretended it was 11.

Mouse: I printed up a fake schedule for them saying we were starting at 9 instead of noon.

Mint: I set their clock to say PM when it’s really AM.

Mara: Oh boy. We may have overdone it.

[Tulip bursts through the door, disheveled and heaving,]

Tulip: WHAT TIME IS IT?

∆∆∆∆

Betty: Guys, I’ve been meaning to tell you… Mara and I are dating.

Mara, Mouse, Tulip, and Mint: [Gasps,]

Betty: Mara, why are you surprised?!

∆∆∆∆

Mouse: What's the scariest horror movie you've ever watched?

Betty: The one with the cabin in the woods.

Mara: Annabelle.

Mint: Paranormal Activity.

Tulip: High School Musical. All throughout high school I was scared that everyone was gonna randomly get up and start singing and dancing, and I would be the only one who doesn't know the words.

∆∆∆∆

Mara: Good morning.

Betty: Good morning!

Mint: Good morning.

Mouse: You all sound like robots, try spicing it up a bit.

[Tulip, hurdling into class through the window,] 

Tulip: MORNING, FA--!

∆∆∆∆

[Everyone is giving advice to Mouse,]

Mint: It's okay to ask for help😌

Mara: You're not a burden😌

Tulip: Murder is okay😌

Betty: Your feelings matter😌

∆∆∆∆

Mara: Mouse is a strings kid. We must sacrifice them to the band gods.

Betty: Yes.

Tulip: You're right. It'd be a good initiation for me.

Mouse: Wait, guys, what about the truce we signed--

Betty: What truce?

Mara: [Sigh,] The truce that we must destroy all the choir kids and leave the strings alone.

Mint: Wait, I'm a choir kid!

Everyone else: [Prepares for sacrifice,]

Mint, being prepared: Hold on just a second, Betty's LITERALLY A CHOIR KID TOO!!!

Betty, holding the Gasoline: Well, duh, but I win everyone else's favour. 😘

Mint, on the stake: You wHORE--

∆∆∆∆

Mouse: If you took a shot for every time you made a bad decision, how drunk would you be?

Mara: Maybe a bit tipsy?

Mint: Drunk.

Tulip: Wasted.

Betty: Dead.

∆∆∆∆

Mint: Anyone d--

Betty: Depressed?

Tulip: Drained?

Mara: Dumb?

Mouse: Disliked?

Mint: --Done with their work... What is wrong with you bitches...

∆∆∆∆

The Squad: [Walking at the mall,]

Tulip: Hey, have any of you guys seen Mouse? She's been gone for a while...

Betty: Eh, nope.

Mara: No, I haven’t...

Mint: Probably ran off to McDonald’s or something.

Mouse: Hey.

Tulip: Ooh, there you are--

Betty: What the fu--

Mint: I-- where were you?!

Mouse: Walking right behind you guys.

∆∆∆∆

Mara: Tulip's first detention, I'm so proud.

Mouse: Whoa, back up. Why'd they get detention?

Mint: Because they're an idiot.

Betty, terrified: They can do that?

Mint: Bitch, you got detention for multiple war crimes against the teaching staff, whachu so scared of?

∆∆∆∆

Caia: Where’s Betty?

Tulip: Doing stuff.

Mint: I don’t like the sound of that. Where’s Mara?

Tulip: Trying to stop Betty from doing the stuff.

Mint: And Mouse?

Tulip: Trying to stop Mara from stopping Betty from doing the stuff.

Mint: I see. And what are you doing here, Tulip?

Tulip: I’m supposed to stop you from stopping Mouse from stopping Mara from stopping Betty from doing the stuff.

∆∆∆∆

Mint: If you put a milkshake in one yard and crack open a cold one in another yard, which yard would the boys go to?

Mouse: Schrödinger's boys.

Betty: FUCK!

Mara: What about cracking open a cold milkshake?

Tulip: As we all know, the milkshake brings the boys to the yard. The presence of the boys is a prerequisite for the cracking open of a cold one, but cold ones do not have any inherent boy-attracting abilities. Milkshakes, however, do.

Tulip: All else being equal, the boys would proceed to the milkshake yard. While it is possible to announce the presence of cold ones in the hope of attracting some boys, the pull of the milkshake is much more powerful by comparison.

Mint: 

Mouse: 

Betty: 

Mara: 

Tulip: Mind you, all of this nonsense hinges on whether or not the boys are back in town.

∆∆∆∆

Mint: Time for plan G.

Tulip: Don’t you mean plan B?

Mint: No, we tried plan B a long time ago. I had to skip over plan C due to technical difficulties.

Mara: What about plan D?

Mint: Plan D was that desperate disguise attempt half an hour ago.

Mouse: What about plan E?

Mint: I’m hoping not to use it. Betty dies in plan E.

Betty: I like plan E.

∆∆∆∆

Mint: I'm going to be an adult in 1 year and I only have a vague idea of what I'm going to do.

Betty: I’m gonna be an adult in less than a year and I don’t know what I’m doing with my life.

Mouse: I'm with you there...

Mara: I'm an adult and I don't know what I'm doing with my life.

Tulip: Three types of people.

∆∆[END]∆∆