[Edited: November 5, 2018]

***

"Permanent Scars"

Jimin's POV

"Do you want me to die?"

"No. I love you," I wanted to say, but I didn't. I don't know why. I honestly don't know why I even do anything at all anymore.

Jungkook would be better off without me. I'm always the problem anyway. I can't just fix myself. I can't get better. I can't, I can't. I'm so far away from being fine and there is no more reason to lie.

All I do is disappoint the people around me and hurt them. I'm so sick of it. I'm so sick of being the reason why the people I love get hurt. Everything in my life feels like horrible nightmare. And the worst part is, whenever I wake up and think that, "Oh, maybe today's going to be better. It's a new day, a new beginning and a new chance."

Then I just realize, I've got no chance. I'm already gone. And I've already made the mistakes I did. My mum is gone, too. And it's all my fault.

"Jimin! Please don't do anything! I'm gonna get you out there!" I heard Hoseok yell from outside of the room. "Jimin?!"

I didn't respond and simply grabbed the sheet of my bed. I tied them around my neck . . . Slowly . . . Slowly tightening.

"Jimin? Please . . . listen to me." I heard keys jingling just outside the door.

"Thank you, Hoseok," I said, not shouting but loud enough for him to hear. "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. Thank you for everything. You're the best friend I ever had."

***

Author's POV

The line went dead.

Jimin's gone.

"No, no, no," Jungkook said as he tried calling him again and again. He wasn't answering. "Please, no. Jimin. You can't be doing this to me. You can't just leave me!"

The latter never answered and Jungkook hurriedly threw his jacket on himself then got out of Yoongi's new house.

Yoongi woke up because of all the noise Jungkook was making. He then called out to the younger but Jungkook completely ignored him. He simply went to his car and drove as fast as he could to get to the asylum.

***

"Please! Let me in. I beg of you! My boyfriend's gonna hurt himself! I-I don't wanna lose him! Please!" Jungkook plead as the guards at the gate of the ward didn't let him in.

"My boyfriend's Park Jimin! You must call Hoseok! Jung Hoseok! Please! I need him! I-I need t-to know that Ji-Jimin is alright." Jungkook started to cry as the guards kept pushing him away.

"We're very sorry, sir," one of them said, but Jungkook didn't need that apology. What he needed was Jimin.

"I'm sure the nurses and doctors are already taking care of it right now," the other said.

"You don't understand!"

"Yes, we do. But we're sorry. We can't let you in on this hours. It's in the rules."

"Fuck the rules." Jungkook turned around to see Yoongi on a motorcycle, taking off his helmet.

"Wh-What are you doing here? Yoongi, where did you get that?" Jungkook asked, pointing at the motorcycle and Yoongi simply got off of it and walked towards them.

"You ask way too many fucking questions."

"Yoongi did youㅡ"

"No, I didn't steal the goddamn motorcycle, but thanks for thinking that," he said in a sarcastic tone. "Does it even really matter, though?"

"No . . ."

"Damn straight," Yoongi clicked his tongue and held onto the gate, his face just inches from it. He looked straight into the eyes of the two guards with a devilish smirk plastered all over his face.

"Think of it like this: if you had a friend who's about to kill himself and is locked up in a place with people who actually can't do a damn thing to stop him, would you take the chance to fire a taser at two stupid guards to help your friend or would you not?"

"Whaㅡ" before the guards could even say anything, Yoongi pulled two tasers from the two side-pockets of his basil green jacket. Jungkook stood in shock as Yoongi used them on the two guards like it was totally normal for him.

When the guards fell on the ground, Yoongi immediately took one of their passes from their pockets and used it. The gates opened by sliding into the two sides of metal walls (fences).

Yoongi then gave the pass to Jungkook.

"What the hell are you waiting for? Go get your man."

Jungkook took it, mumbling a 'thank you' and hurriedly ran to the left side of the asylum, trying to hide from the other patrolling guards. Yoongi stayed to take care of the guards he took down.

Jungkook kept running to God knows where. He reached the maze garden that Jimin often talked to him about, and he decided to hide behind one of the grass walls to call Hoseok's phone.

"Pick up, pick up, pick the fucking phone up, Jimin. Please."

The latter still didn't answer, causing Jungkook to curse under his breath. A nearby guard heard him and asked, "Who's there?" like he expected whoever it was to actually answer him.

"I've got no time for this," Jungkook thought to himself. He ran as fast as he could, not minding the guards starting to shout and run after him.

He tried to call Jimin over and over again, but it was just no use. Then he tried the asylum number Hoseok gave him just in case they find themselves in situations like this.

"H-Hello?" Jungkook said nervously.

"Hey, sorry, but we can't really do anything for you right now. We . . . We're in the middle of something, uh . . . Iㅡ"

"Hoseok? It's me! Jungkook!" The younger yelled to the other line as he continued running as fast as he could.

"This isn't Hoseok. I'm sorry but heㅡ"

"ㅡI need to know where he is! I'm outside the asylum right now! Well, I'm inside the premises but I'm outside the building and I don't know where the fuck to go! I'm the only who can save him right now, if he's truly not listening to you."

Jungkook expected more of a scolding or a threat (because he's going against the rules) coming from the stranger, but he received none but strict and understandable instructions. The guy believed Jungkook for some reason, but it was no time to be surprised or ask whoever it was. He simply did everything the man said and went wherever he had to go.

At some point, he luckily lost the guards so he had more of a chance to look for Jimin's room. He went to the one and only backdoor of the huge building. The guy apparently opened it for Jungkook from the controls in the security room.

Jungkook mumbled a 'thank you' but the latter said it was not yet time for him to say that. Then he ran to the elevator that took too long to arrive. He'd no choice but to take the stairs and so he did.

Every step felt like he was losing more and more of the chance to save Jimin. Every second getting wasted. He just wanted to stop time right there and then. He could do nothing but cry his heart out as he ran and obeyed orders from a stranger who's apparently helping him get to his boyfriend in time before he does the thing that Jungkook never even wants to think about. But it's all that's running in Jungkook's mind right now.

How he can lose Jimin at any moment now. At any second.

"Hey, man. Breathe, okay? You can't pass out right now. Listen to my voice. Listen to me. Don't think about anything else. You'll be okay, trust me, man. He's going to be okay, too. You'll save him. You'll save him."

"H-How can you s-say that?" Jungkook asked in between his breaths as he didn't take a second to stop running.

"Because I believe he loves you and he won't leave you just like that, okay?"

"Iㅡ" Jungkook stopped as he saw the crowd of nurses and PABs trying to open the door with the key.

Then he felt stuck. Like time had finally stopped as he wished it, yet the beating of his heart didn't slow down. The tears streaming down his cheeks didn't either.

Then he ran. He ran through all of them, put back his phone in his pocket and took the key away from one of the struggling PABs and tried to open the door himself.

"Jimin!" Jungkook yelled from outside the room, making the Jimin stop and stare at the door. He didn't know what to do. He wanted to leave. He wanted everything to end. He always had.

He just wanted to give himself what he deserved. But why?

Why does it have to hurt the person he loves the most in return? Why does he have to choose between his life and Jungkook's? Why is everything so fucking difficult?

"I love you," Jimin heard him say, making his breath hitch and his knees fall onto the ground.

The younger successfully opened the door and wasted no time to run towards him, taking the sheet of fabric from his lover's hands. Jimin didn't fight him back. Seeing Jungkook crying makes him feel weak. Part of the reason why he wanted to finish it before Jungkook could even get in and stop him.

But Jimin knew he couldn't. He just couldn't leave Jungkook like that. As he stared in the younger's eyes, filled with fear, misery and happiness for he was able to prevent himself from losing Jimin. For he was finally there, with him.

Jungkook wrapped his arms around Jimin tightly once he threw the sheet away somewhere in the room.

The PABs and nurses simply watched from a distance as Jungkook rocked his boyfriend, wiping his tears and peppering his face with small kisses.

"I couldn't do it." Jimin sobbed. "I love you, I can't leave you. I'm so sorry."

"Shh, shh, baby. Don't worry. I'm here. I understand." Jungkook caressed Jimin's hair and kissed him on the forehead. "I love you, Jimin."

"I'm so sorry, I just wanted everything to end. I just couldn't take it."

"Don't worry anymore, Jimin. I'm here and I'll never let you go again, understand?"

"Butㅡ"

"I'll never let you go, I promise."

"I'm not getting better, Jungkook."

"'Kookie', you call me 'Kookie', remember?" Jungkook asked desperately, his voice cracking.

"Baby, I promised you we'll get through this. I promised you I'll stay. I'll help you get better no matter what."

"But that's not going to happen."

"Shh, don't say that," Jungkook said, tears continuing to stream down his face. "Even if you don't truly recover, I'll always save you okay? I promise. I will always save you. I don't care how many times, I don't care if we'll still cry and go through these kinds of situations when we grow old together, I'll never leave you. I'll stay and always save you, because I love you."

Jimin bawled even harder if that was even possible and hugged Jungkook as tight as he could, burying his face in his chest.

"I promise," was the last thing Jimin heard before he lost consciousness.