It's hard to breathe.

You don't know how long you've done this.

It was dark, you can't see anything, but your legs wouldn't stop moving. It's all you've ever known to do.

Running, with flowers so delicate in your hands.

Keep running.

Don't stop.

Even if you're out of breath, even if your legs are screaming; run.

Because they'll never stop chasing.

The faceless giant monsters with wide smiles; ones who suffocated you, ones whose whips left scars on your skin, ones whose laughter surrounded you like thunders in a storm, ones who'd crush these flowers so ruthlessly by plucking their petals one by one.

Run.

Because that's all you can do.

"Nee... Nee-san..." [1]

I felt myself being shaken awake, and a resistant hum escaped me.

5 more minutes...

Sleeping late was never a good idea, especially when you're someone who values time, but fairly speaking, I was left with little choice. There were deadlines for me to meet, and not finishing my work on the due date was not an option.

Deadlines scare me more than bugs and ghosts. Anyone who did freelance work would understand this.

At the very least, I hoped my client was satisfied with the result. The website I made for them was cute!

"Nee-san...!"

The soft voice kept calling out my name, poking me and trying to stir me awake.

Ughhhh, nooo...

With heavy eyelids, my eyes slowly fluttered open against my will, and I was met with the sight of a familiar dusty white ceiling, and the adorable frowning face of my little brother peering down at me.

"Wake up. It's late in the morning already."

... Late morning...? Ah, no wonder my stomach was rumbling the whole time.

Wait, then that means... breakfast...

I jolted awake, and he dodged in time before our heads could bump again. He had learned when to avoid it after experiencing it multiple times before.

Shit, I didn't make breakfast!

As if he could read my mind, he spoke, "We made onigiri. Kazu is heating up the food for you."

I blinked at him, then smiled in silence.

"... What?" He asked, worried and looking so disrespectful as he questioned my sudden staring contest.

It made me burst out laughing and I sighed fondly. "Ahh, Kou-chan, you and Kazu are a much better cook than I was when I was your age."

As I predicted, my words made him scoff to himself. "And you wonder why I call you old. You speak like one," he grumbled, turning away. His next words were quiet, but I managed to catch glimpses and arrange his full sentence in my head. "... It's just simple onigiri. Besides, we had you to teach us, so..."

My smile widened into a grin.

"Ah, what was that?" I asked, and the hint of teasing in my voice made his ears redden.

"I said you drool in your sleep everywhere, it's gross! Go shower!" And he threw a pillow at me, to which I let it hit me in the face, before he stormed away.

I watched him stomp away, not bothering to hold back my laughter. As always, it was fun to tease Kousuke. It was easy to fluster him.

I reached for my phone to check the time: Saturday, 10:21 a.m.

No wonder Kou was making a fuss. He never liked me missing my meals.

My attention was drawn to a notification from a few hours ago. A money transfer. I smiled at the amount.

It was the result of my hard work. People would give me tasks and requests through my commission page, and I'd accept the ones I wanted to do and then get money. As for how my commission page is trusted enough to have people flooding in... well, let's not talk about it for now.

'... Hm, maybe I should buy them something. Maybe a Nintendo Switch? Kazuki never asked for it but he always eyed it whenever we went to the stores... Yeah, I should get that for them. Should I take them out for hotpot too while we're at it?'

I got up from my bed with a groan, stretching my limbs. My back hurts from hours of sitting in front of my laptop last night. It was to a point that the pain made it hard for me to breathe.

Maybe my brothers weren't wrong whenever they call me old. Who gets back ache at the early age of 17?

... Probably some of the readers here but hey, what do I know?

I yawned, groggily stumbling out of my room.

God, I really should start exercising...

My lack of physical health aside, me and my brother live in a small simple apartment. It wasn't ours, unfortunately. With me being underaged, I don't have the right to buy a property. In the first place, I didn't want to use anything related to my ID to buy anything, afraid to leave a trace, so it's mostly me using my e-wallet that only required a phone number and email.

I hate to be overly cautious, but that's how I've been living so far. Being thrown into another orphanage wasn't preferable after how it went last time. At the very least, I have to stay hidden until I'm legally an adult.

Ugh, thank god for technology growth and e-money's existence.

If I really had to buy anything, I usually transfer money to my landlord and ask her to buy stuff. She was the only adult I could depend on after I had once prevented her from getting mugged on the street. (A memorable event, by the way. I felt like batman for a good 5 minutes.)

This apartment was one of the properties she owned. She had mentioned many times that I could stay here with my brothers for as long as I needed, most likely because of my sob story.

Dignity? Pride? Shame? They were nonexistent to me. I'm willing to lay bare and sell anything of me as long as I get to feed my brothers and let them live another day.

But anyway, I rejected her tempting offer.

Even if I was purposely fishing for sympathy, leeching off other people to live wasn't my style. (Not with how limited people's generosity could be.) We settled on a compromise that I'd pay half of the rent and do her chores. This way, it didn't feel like much of a charity, and I wouldn't seem shameless.

Alas, it was difficult to find someone so kind and accommodating as a runaway.

Aside from having my brothers with me, meeting my landlord was a blessing.

I went and showered quickly, dressing up and draping the towel over my head before I walked to the main room, where I saw Kazuki sitting at the dining table, scribbling something on his book.

There was no sign of the younger twin.

"Where's Kou?" I asked as I looked around.

"Out to water the neighbor's garden," the older twin replied from his seat without much of a glance away from his book.

Ah, right. They do that, too.

My younger brothers would often do other people's chores for money. I didn't understand why they wanted to work for it when I could just give it to them.

I sauntered over, picking up the warm onigiri to take a bite while peering over him. "Homework?"

"Mhm," Kazuki hummed.

I went and sat beside him. It was nice to see him so... diligent. Being able to enroll my siblings in junior high school felt good. It was nice since I wasn't able to attend one.

I wanted them to live a normal life.

Thinking about it, I should be in high school by now... But I can't do that. Working while pursuing education? I'd be lucky not to die from overworking and exhaustion.

Maybe I should take the Middle School Equivalency Exam[2] after all. Most legal jobs require passing junior high. While I can make a good amount of money with freelancing, no matter how much I like its flexibility, it isn't stable.

I need stability for Kazuki and Kousuke.

"How's school?" I asked, chewing on my food. While simple, it was delicious. I've taught my brothers how to cook before, and they did exceptionally well. Kazuki seemed to like it more among the two. I wonder if he wants to attend a culinary school someday.

He was excellent with a knife.

"... It's okay," he said impassively, still not looking up from his book. "But my classmates are noisy and my teachers keep crossing the line."

I instantly couldn't help but frown in confusion and concern. "Crossing the line? How?"

Is anyone messing with him? Are the adults being mean? Maybe bullying children is common there? Should I look up their digital footprint and-

"They keep telling me to hang out with the other kids... Why do I have to?"

... Ah, so it's that.

I held back an amused snort, settling on a fond sigh.

Kazu and his disgust to socializing... It was almost cute.

No, it was bad to encourage his inactive social life! He's a kid so he should live like a kid! ...Then again, maybe he's just having a grumpy teen phase going through puberty. It's normal for 12-year-olds to start going through them, right...?

"Why don't you want to hang out with them?" I nudged gently.

Kazuki scoffed, and I had a feeling it wasn't directed at me, but at the idea of being around the people he called noisy. He spoke as he scribbled onto the paper, sounding confused and disturbed, "...I don't like loud people. Why do they fight over who plays what in FPS games and then refuse to talk to each other whenever they think the other is annoying? They're all equally annoying," he said bluntly.

Even while ranting and having much to say, he looked indifferent and aloof. But I suppose that's just how he had always been.

"And they're nosy," he continued. "Why do they wanna know what type of car my family owns and my phone brand? Why do they brag about their parents' occupations and money? It's not like it's their occupation and money. What's there to be proud of when they don't know a single thing about field work? I don't get it."

Oh... Hm.

I contemplated his words.

I was never surrounded by people my age when I was in my pre-teen phase. I wouldn't know what he felt, so I wasn't sure what to say to reassure him.

At times like this, I always struggled to connect and be dependable.

"I'm... sure it's not that bad," I replied hesitantly. "They're not mean to you, are they?"

Kazuki shrugged. "Dunno. They laugh and poke fun at me when I say I don't have parents, though."

My face soured.

Right. That happens. How could I have forgotten?

I knew the typical mean words people say. They were often spread all over the internet. Cyberbullying, they call it. Of course, hearing it with your own ears instead of reading it on a website was a whole other thing. Kids who aren't well-behaved exist.

"And?" I asked again, trying to coax him to say more without letting anything negative latch onto my voice. The last thing I'd want was to freak him out.

"And nothing," he sighed. "I have you and Kou, and I don't remember anything about mom and dad, so it's not like it matters."

...

I held back a deep sigh.

I didn't know when it started, but Kazuki's mind seemed to be naturally wired in a way that roused my concern. He had been an impassive person for as long as I could remember; reacting and commenting on things apathetically, not caring about things unless it affects us...

Does he really not think about our parents? Does he not want anything? Kazuki never complained unless it was about something that really annoyed him. Is that normal??? Kids should whine and complain all the time, right???

Then again, it wasn't normal for kids like us to be a bunch of runaways.

... I don't know. I still don't know a lot of things, and I'm not sure I'll ever know enough.

In the end, I just smiled gently.

"If anyone bothers you, you tell me," was all I could say.

"..." Kazuki averted his gaze. "I can take care of myself," he muttered quietly.

I rolled my eyes, taking another bite of my food. I had no doubts that he could take care of himself, but what's my job if it's not to worry over him?

"Violence isn't always the answer," I chided.

Kazuki nodded pensively. "Violence is the question and the answer is yes."

I hit the top of his head with my fist.

"Ow!" he yelped, dropping his pencil to hold his head. "Hypocrite!"

"You asked for it," I replied with a chuckle as I finished my late breakfast and got up to wash the dishes.

Weekends were always peaceful.

I scrubbed the plates and did my set of chores, leaving Kazuki to focus on his own things. Eventually, I had to take out the trash and walk out of the apartment.

Just in time, I could spot my landlord, and she saw me too.

"Ah, good afternoon, [Name]!" the friendly older woman greeted me with a smile.

"Afternoon, Airi-san," I greeted her back politely. "Do you need my help with stuff today?"

Airi waved at my words. "Ah, it's okay! I'm just going out to the vet right now for Momo's usual checkup," she said, pointing at the little animal she was carrying in her cat carrier.

I bent down slightly to peer over the caged Momo and waved with a smile. "Hi, baby. I hope you'll have fun," I said, and the feline meowed in response. I looked back at Airi. "Well, don't let me stop you. I'll be sure to make you something for dinner later."

Airi laughed in response and nodded. "Of course. I can't wait."

I bid her farewell and watched her leave with her car.

Ah, what a nice cat lady.

I turned back to my apartment.

Time to check the other commissions.

* * *

I scrolled through my laptop, the mouse cursor hovering over texts that passed my gaze.

Thanks to the internet and public libraries, for years, I've been studying on my own and opened up an anonymous freelance business. Web, application, and software development? UI/UX design? Data management? Machine learning? Cyber security? I could easily take up those tasks and projects.

... Well, not easily. It took a lot of time, effort, and hard work to get where I am now. Fortunately, I'm not one to struggle with studying. I learn and pick up stuff rather quickly. It makes me wonder how I would do in school if I were to attend one, but I'm getting off-track.

Everything within the page I was currently scrolling over didn't only involve technologies.

Computer stuff aside, I also do other freelance work. As it turns out, you can actually do a lot of stuff when you're desperate and have a lot of time to spare.

Photography is one of my favorites.

Compared to the others, I could, at the very least, relax while taking photos.

Thankfully, they were mostly about aesthetic scenery or high-quality pictures for them to put in their journals or articles.

Of course, there were... others.

You'd be surprised to see how many people would pay someone to take pictures of others with me having to tail them. Creepy, but I was immune to those requests by now and I always avoided it.

In the end, you just never know with these customers.

Anyway, my anonymous freelance business was doing good, all because I did incredibly well in my very few commissions when I first built it and I used social platforms to promote my works here and there. Reviews started pouring in, and eventually, there were many. I'd like to think all the luck from my misfortunes went here.

As I was stuck in my head, my gaze landed on a certain title subject.

[ P: I hope this offer is of interest to you. ]

Huh. It was photography.

I clicked on it.

-- [ This is embarrassing, but hello, I'm a journalist from TBS News (I will send you proof of my legitimacy). I'll keep this short. I want to write an article about our country's small towns and faraway districts, but my time given, while not short, is still limited. I really, truly want to include Makochi... ]

Makochi? The town that's known to be full of troublemakers and gang fights?

-- [ ...However, I'm on the other side of the country to visit another town so I won't be able to travel to Makochi on time to do both; take pictures and do resident interviews. I've decided to be efficient. I've heard about you from a blog that I follow and I'm interested in commissioning you. If you're willing to take up this task, let me know. I am willing to discuss payment. If it helps to motivate, the payment won't be small, especially with the known risks. I know that it might take a while for a travel photography commission so we'll cover and arrange your expenses, living commodities, and anything of concern. I hope you'll consider it! ]

I stared at my laptop thoughtfully in silence.

Photography of neglected places... for journalism...

Not bad, if I excluded the fact that I'd be practically walking into a lion's den. It was such a tempting work.

TBS News is an online news publication that has the trust of the public, and the website itself covers a wide array of topics ranging from politics to lifestyles. It certainly wasn't a bad offer. No, it was undoubtedly a big deal.

A big part of me wanted to take it. It was a business opportunity no matter what side you look at it from. If my freelance business managed to receive a good review after a satisfying result, especially from such a big trusted agency, then I wouldn't have to worry about my future endeavors.

Sure, they might've put up this commission for someone else before me because they knew how dangerous Makochi could be, but that didn't matter. I've gone through quite a bit of those things to feel fazed.

... Still. No matter how much I wanted to take it...

I looked to the side, a picture frame of me and my brothers on a frame, sitting nicely on the desk.

Kazuki was giving a small smile to the camera. Kou was reluctant, but he eventually gave his signature boyish smile. And from the picture, I can still remember ruffling their hair and almost squeezing their necks from cuteness aggression.

A small giggle escaped me.

Cute. They really were the cutest.

I sighed, my smile fading slightly.

'They need to finish school. I can't disrupt that, and I can't just leave them alone to travel into a bunch of thugs' territory for a few months.'

And with that in mind...

Let's ignore that commission for now. I'll write a refusal reply later.

I decided to scroll past and search for something else, settling on a task to recover a person's social media account from a hacker.

I cracked my neck.

This'll be easy enough.

* * *

It was Sunday.

The sun was shining, the town bustling...

And I was taking Kazuki and Kousuke out to shop!

"... You don't have to do this," Kazuki said beside me while I held both of their hands so I wouldn't lose them in the crowd.

I looked back at him. "What are you saying? Of course, I have to! I can't just let the money sit around to rot."

"It's not like the money is going anywhere..." he idly muttered, glancing around as we passed by the shopping district. I ignored his useless mutterings. I wasn't going to change my mind.

"Where are we even going?" Kou questioned, tilting his head up at me.

"You'll see." I winked.

I dragged them into a store that became all too familiar after walking past it multiple times before.

"... Nintendo?" Kazuki blinked.

I stopped in the middle of the store and turned around to face them. Placing my hands on their heads, I smiled as I ruffled their hair. "Go pick anything you want. I'll buy them."

Kazuki opened his mouth, but I lifted a finger. "A-ah! No questioning, no refusing. If you don't pick anything, I'll pick everything I put my hands on and give them to you."

That shut him up real quick.

"..." Kazuki sighed. "Alright," he relented in defeat, and I watched as he turned away to browse the aisles.

I couldn't help but smile slightly, before looking down to see that Kousuke was still there.

"... Why are you still here?"

Kou rolled his eyes at my obvious question. "Well, since you're gonna buy us stuff anyway, then can I just buy martial arts gear for my share?"

"..." I stared at him.

"..." He stared at me. Blankly. Then he grew nervous at my gaze. "Please?"

I sighed.

Oh, what the hell, sure. I have the money anyway, and I was already intending to buy them anything.

"Alright..." I relented, "but you're still gonna pick a game."

"But-!"

I stared him down and Kou flinched.

"... Fineee," he groaned, finally walking away.

I watched his small back disappear into one of the aisles with a smile.

This was all I ever wanted and hoped for, to be able to take care of them, spoil them, have them be kids... just like they should be.

"..."

My shoulders slumped slightly.

'... Mom, Dad, am I doing a good job?'

~

Me and my brothers roamed the shopping district.

I paid for whatever they chose, and I was relieved that they hadn't chosen just a thing or two. I suppose they already knew that I would've just picked more stuff for them if that were the case.

"Where to?" I asked them.

Kou looked down at the stuff they were carrying and then up at me with raised eyebrows. "We're going somewhere else?"

"Of course." I rolled my eyes. It was obvious. "It's my payment day."

"You don't have a payment day," Kazuki replied without missing a beat.

"Every day is a payment day for me. Stop arguing," I shut his reply down.

Kou scoffed, looking to the side.

Kazuki mumbled, "... I want sushi."

The younger of the two snapped his head to glare at the other. "But I want udon."

"No one cares if you want udon," Kazuki retorted.

"I do!" Kou exclaimed.

I facepalmed exasperatedly. "Both of you, pipe down. We'll just find a food court that has both of them."

My brothers glared at each other, before looking away with a 'hmph'.

'... Ugh, every damn time...'

~

Just as heavens intended, we did find a food court that had both, and my brothers managed to find something they wanted.

Watching them eat felt good, it's also in my list of 'spoiling them until I die of old age'. No matter how reluctant they were, they could never resist delicious food.

I rested my face on my palm, seeing munch on their respective meal.

I'd be stupid if I didn't know where their reluctance came from.

Money, food, and all basic necessities would have been a god-sent blessing for us if it were 3 years ago.

Kou and Kazuki were 6 at that time. Those years on the streets were rooted deep in their minds. Honestly, if it weren't for the roof on our heads, I would've snatched them from that place faster and ran without a second thought.

I didn't want to think much about it. There were too many unpleasant things.

The first time I managed to get money and feed them was the moment I felt like I accomplished something. Getting high grades during elementary didn't even feel like this. Seeing my brothers' faces light up after eating delicious food... it felt fulfilling, just like now.

Kou stiffly used the chopstick to take another bite, but he was definitely getting better at it compared to last time (Kazuki was undoubtedly talented with his hands so he did it better). Then his eyes flickered up at me. "Is watching us eat that fun?"

I snorted. "A little. You eat like a chipmunk."

He instantly placed his hand on his cheek. "Leave my baby fat alone," he grumbled.

"What fat?" Kazuki chimed in with a deadpan after swallowing his sushi.

"Baby."

"The only baby thing about you is when you cry," Kazuki muttered.

Kou huffed indignantly and stared at him. "... I hope a bird shit falls on your head," he grumbled, lifting his chopsticks to snatch a sushi from Kazuki's plate.

"You- Hey!"

Kou brought the food to my mouth. His hold on the chopsticks was slightly trembling, and it was adorable, but I held myself back from teasing him as I took it in my mouth.

Kazuki scowled. "I demand retribution."

I laughed and ruffled his hair. "Whatever you want."

And the peaceful day went by like always.

I wished things could stay this way for a long, long time.

Of course, for some reason, nothing ever goes the way I want them to.

* * *

I was woken up by a constant knock on the door.

I frowned, trying to flutter my heavy eyes open. My hand reached for my phone to check the time.

01:08 a.m.

Who the hell is here at this ungodly hour?

I haven't gotten enough sleep because of recent commissions, I did not need this.

I wanted to ignore it, but the knocking sounded urgent, and I groggily dragged myself out of bed before limping to the door to check through the peephole.

The face that greeted me was familiar, and worried.

'... Airi-san?'

I was someone who took pride in my gut feeling. Through the years, it has never betrayed me.

Right now, I didn't like the strange feeling in my stomach. For the first time in so long, I felt uneasy. My gut feeling told me that I would hate this, and I considered ignoring Airi and continue to pretend to sleep just so I won't hear it, but something tells me that might be worse.

Reluctantly, I opened the door and behond, there was my landlord who was panting with a slightly panicked expression on her face.

"Airi-san, what-"

But she cut me off immediately. "There are people. They're in town, and they're searching for you."

F*ck.

I felt my stomach drop. "What?"

"They-" Airi inhaled between heavy breaths, walking past me and into the apartment before shutting the door, "They were asking around, putting up missing posters- of you and your siblings. I didn't want to believe it either, but I recognized it immediately because you've shown me pictures of Kazu and Kou when they were kids," she explained quickly as she made her way to the living room.

I followed her with a dreadful expression. My stomach felt like it was twisting and I was nauseous. "What-?!"

Airi stopped in her tracks and turned to face me. "I think Kazu and Kou are safe. There's a big change in appearance compared to when they were six." The woman sighed deeply. "But you... unfortunately, you're quite recognizable, [Name]."

'...Ah, damn it.'

No no no. Why? Why now? It's been six years. Why are they still looking for us? It didn't make any sense. We're now without guardians, so they could've easily just swept the money and leave us alone.

"... How did they end up searching here...?" I asked, my mind still racing and I could feel my palms sweating.

"There are... multiple possibilities," Airi replied uncertainly. "But what I do know is that, since they're searching so hard for so long, then the only reasonable explanation is that someone, probably your relative, is actively looking for you."

My brows scrunched up in confusion.

"But I don't have a relative?"

Airi shook her head. "Weren't you too young to know that or even remember? For all we know, they could be family members that your parents never explained to you."

I massaged my forehead, preparing for an upcoming headache.

What Airi said didn't make sense, it shouldn't, but it did. I thought it was only reasonable to give up after years of going missing, especially when there's no one to look for you. But if there was... then no wonder they pressed on.

I could feel Airi's gaze on me, and then she spoke softly, "... Is it a bad idea to meet them and speak to them? Maybe they're looking for you for a good reason."

I couldn't help but scoff, not at the woman, but at the idea. It was ridiculous. "What other reason do they have? They either want to throw me back into the institution or give my brothers out for adoption. I can't even take them in because I'm a year away from being able to transfer out. Either way, I won't have my own will. Nothing I say matters."

Worst-case scenario, they'll keep me just to use the inheritance money and lie that it was to indulge me and my brothers even though we didn't get sh*t. It wouldn't be the first time.

"... But what if there are really your relatives out there who are willing to be your guardians? It's a chance worth taking, right? Having a roof over your brothers' heads, and a relatively calming life?"

For a brief moment, I was silent. This time... Airi's words were acceptable, it was a fairly reasonable explanation, perhaps even the one that made the most sense. There could be someone out there who actually cares. It's believable... if I didn't witness at first-hand how shit adults could be.

Going back after what we've been through? After trying so hard to run and hide? It was out of the question.

I can't trust them. If I want to survive, I can't trust anyone but myself.

I had to hold back the urge to chuckle bitterly. "To still do that even after 6 years for kids you barely know? Yeah, right. As if anyone ever cared that much for people they've never met," I muttered.

How can I not think that there's an end-goal to this?

My parents have never told me about any other relatives, and I'd like to think I have a damn good memory. I'd remember them if they've ever been mentioned, especially since my parents barely talked about themselves to me.

If my parents have never mentioned any extended family, I have to treat them as strangers.

Once again, you'll never know with these people.

I bit my thumb as I felt the gears in my head turning.

'Come on. Think. This isn't the first time you're in a crisis.'

What should I do? Where should I go? How will I do it?

There was a reason why I managed to survive out in the streets for so long, and that was my ability to adapt and improvise.

"Ah."

I pulled out my phone and checked my commission requests.

Photography commission in Makochi.

Makochi. A town filled with troublemakers, a place where nothing else matters but strength, and street fights happen at least once a day.

It wasn't my ideal place. I couldn't fight well, and never had the time to learn because I was too focused on studies and making money for a living. Hell, Kou fights better than me because he loves martial arts, and Kazuki joined him in judo lessons as daily sport.

All I could do was run fast. You kinda have to be able to do that to survive.

Makochi would be my last option, but it would also be the last option for those people to search for me.

I looked up at Airi with a determined gaze. "Airi-san, can I pay my rent early and leave?"

Airi blinked at me. "Leave?" she frowned in concern. Though she expected me to say that, she probably didn't think it would be this sudden. "Where are you going?"

I steeled my resolve and turned to head for my brothers' room. "Someplace where they won't find me."

* * *

I stormed into their room, frantically yanking their blankets away. "Wake up! Right. Now," I spoke through my gritted teeth, turning away to grab their bags and shoved their belongings inside.

"Hm...?" Kazuki mumbled, rubbing his sleepiness away.

Kazu was a light sleeper, so he awoke easily, while Kou groaned, stirring in his bed and opening his heavy eyes.

"What's happening...? Nee-san?" Kou spoke groggily.

I tried to pack as quickly as possible, making sure to not miss anything. I didn't want to leave any of their things behind. "They're close. The people looking for us. Airi-san saw them," I explained urgently.

That seemed to immediately struck Kou awake. "Wait, what?"

Kazuki frowned deeply. "... So we're leaving then? Right now?"

"Right now," I affirmed, still collecting their things.

Perhaps it was a good thing that I couldn't see their torn faces, or else I would've cursed myself for putting them in this position, and neither of the twins said anything either.

Kazuki glanced at Kou before climbling off his bed to help me pack. "... Okay, let's go."

Kousuke hesitated, but only for a second, before he jumped off his bed to help out.

The packing took a good 20 minutes, and once I was certain that everything was packed, I met Airi who was still sitting in the living room.

The woman stood up quickly once she saw us. "[Name], dear, are you sure about this?" she asked, concern evident on her expression and in her voice. "You can lay low and-"

"That's too risky, Airi-san," I said. "They're too close and I'm not gonna take my chances. I have to leave."

Airi stared at me, and then looked down at Kousuke and Kazuki who were gripping on the hem of my jacket. She sighed. "... Are you at least leaving some of your clothes?" she asked.

I didn't understand why Airi told me to do that. Was it because carrying everything would be too heavy on the way? I assume she'd throw them away after I move out.

"... We did," I said.

Airi smiled and pat my shoulder gently. "Good. I'll keep them clean. This apartment is always open for whenever the three of you want to return."

...?

I blinked, and I didn't realize my breath had hitched.

... Ah, so that's why.

A place to return to...

For me, that was a concept I never knew nor understood. Even right now, I couldn't fathom why she'd do this. I would be moving away. There'd be no rent for me to pay, no chores for my brothers to do, there's no transaction happening, yet she'd do this for me?

A lie? No, she wasn't the type to lie. Then why?

I didn't get it, but... perhaps someday...

"... Thank you for everything, Airi-san." Then I hesitated. After all, this one would be called asking for a favor. "Will you handle Kazu and Kou's school matters for me?"

Airi smiled. "I will. Just message me once you're safe." She looked down at the boys and smiled. "You two, as well. Be safe. Don't hesitate to call me up if you need help."

Kazuki and Kousuke both leapt into the woman's arms, hugging her tightly.

"Thank you for the free meals all this time, Airi-san," Kazu mumbled.

"Mm, I'm gonna miss watering the neighbors garden..." Kou added.

Airi chuckled softly and returned their tight embrace. "Thank you, too. For accompanying this bothersome lady."

"..." I could only watch.

And so, me and my brothers left. It had been so long since we moved, and now, we were leaving the apartment we've occupied for ±2 years, the place where we lived in the longest and felt the most comfortable.

Kousuke and Kazuki must've felt conflicted, but they still hadn't said anything. They never did when it involved me. They kept their mouths shut at the back of the taxi as we drove away.

... I would've preferred it if they cried and begged us to stay because they have things they like here. They should throw a tantrum, get upset, get angry. At least then I'd know they weren't suppressing themselves for my sake.

I looked out the window in my passenger seat, watching buildings and lights pass by in the dead of night.

In the sky above, there were lone two stars, and it felt like I was being mocked.

'... Sorry, mom, dad. This daughter of yours seemed to have failed yet again.'

---

mini dictionary;;

[1] "Neesan" (姉さん, né-san) in Japanese means "older sister" or "big sister".

[2] Middle School Equivalency Exam is a test used to assess whether someone has achieved the same level of academic knowledge and skills as a graduate of middle or junior high school. It's essentially an alternative path to gaining a credential equivalent to a middle school diploma, particularly for those who may not have attended or completed traditional middle school programs.
> MC left the orphanage when they were 11, completing elementary but never attending middle school.

additional info, or just to make things clear;;

[1] mc is 17 years old; they should be in 2nd grade of high school in current time.

[2] mc's brothers are twins. both are 12 years old and in middle school. kazuki is older, kousuke younger. kazuki is calmer, kousuke more outspoken. mc and her brothers used to live in an orphanage.

[3] if you hadn't picked up on it; if sakura's symbolism is walking on a tight rope, mc's symbol is running and never stopping. as for what that means... well, we'll figure it out ;)

୨ৎ

author's note: points of view will be done interchangeably. it might go from first person, second person, or third (can be focused on different characters); depends on how the chapter goes. in this prologue, everyone takes a peek at mc's mind and how their thoughts are wired.

i'm trying to take things slow and reveal bit by bit as to not dump everything all at once lol. i'm lowkey kinda satisfied with how this turns out. hope you enjoyed the prologue.

thanks for reading!