♫ : without me - halsey

You woke up earlier than usual.

The boys were passed out in the guest room, Heeseung on the futon and Jake curled up like a dog at the foot of the bed. One arm hanging off, his mouth slightly open.

You didn't know how either of them slept through the heatwave that was currently roasting this tiny beach town like it's a fucking oven.

You were sweating in your tank top and shorts. The ceiling fan was spinning uselessly.

So you left.

You grabbed your water bottle, phone, and your keys, then slipped on your flip flops. You didn't leave a note, they wouldn't even notice you're gone until at least noon. Jake liked his late mornings. Heeseung was no better.

The air outside slapped you in the face. It was barely past seven, and it already felt like hell was leaking into the atmosphere. You took a long swig of water and started walking, feet dragging through the sidewalk.

Your destination wasn't exactly a conscious choice. Well, it never was.

You just ended up, somehow, at the beach.

It was quiet, mostly. A few people were out running, some older ladies doing yoga near the picnic benches. The waves were slow and steady, sloshing up against the shore like they had nowhere better to be.

You tossed your flip flops aside and sank into the hot sand. And you sat.

You let your head tip back a little as you stared at the sky. It was the kind of blue that looked unreal, cloudless and arrogant. You hated how nostalgic it made you feel. This beach used to be yours. Yours and your best friend's. Yours and your boyfriend's.

Well. Ex-best friend. Ex-boyfriend.

You should've expected it.

"Hey."

You blinked. Then looked up.

Of course it was them.

"You alone?" Eva asked first. Her voice is sharp, like her eyeliner.

You glanced at the guy standing next to her. Kyle still looked like a red flag in human form. Your stomach twisted, but you hid it.

"Didn't think you'd be back here," he said casually, hands in his pockets.

"Didn't think you'd be this bold," you said back, your tone dry.

Eva scoffed a laugh. "So. You and Jake, huh?"

You blinked slowly. You should've said nothing. You knew that. You should've been mature and emotionally healed and probably walked away.

Instead, you said, "Why do you care?"

She shrugged, twirling her sunglasses in one hand. "It's just... you know. Surprising."

"Shocking, even," your ex-boyfriend added with a grin. "I mean, considering last time I checked, you were crying over me."

Something cracked in you.

You looked at him, dead in the eye. "Yeah. Last time you checked was four years ago, when you were fucking my best friend behind my back."

Kyle's smile faded a little. Eva's did too.

"We were kids," she said. "You need to get over it."

"Right," you replied. "Because cheating and lying only count when you're over eighteen."

Kyle shrugged. "Whatever. You still mad about it, or are you just pretending to be with Jake for the attention?"

You blinked.

He looked so damn smug. Like he knew you. Like he still thought of you as that girl who used to orbit around him like a damn moon. Your blood was boiling now, hotter than the sand beneath your legs.

"You think I'd pretend to be with someone just to prove something to you two?" you snapped.

They didn't answer.

You laughed bitterly. "You're not that important."

"Could've fooled me," Kyle said, tilting his head. "You look pretty defensive right now."

You stood up.

And you said it. Loud. Clear. Your pride held together by duct tape and caffeine.

"Jake and I are together."

Eva raised her eyebrows. "Like... together together?"

"Yes," you replied. "As in boyfriend. As in romantic. As in not. Fucking. Pretend."

Your ex-boyfriend laughed under his breath. "Good luck with that. Hope it lasts longer than your last one."

Then they left.

You sat back down and wiped your face with your shirt. Not because you were crying. You were sweating. A lot.

You were not crying. Absolutely not.

You checked your phone. No texts.

You sat there for another hour, half hoping Jake would come looking for you, half hoping he'd never find out. Because what the fuck did you just say? You knew it was a bluff. You KNEW.

You weren't dating Jake. Jake doesn't even like you like that. Right?

You walked back home sometime past 9 AM. The heat had doubled. You were sticky and gross and your phone kept buzzing in your pocket.

When you got to the house, the boys were still asleep. You snuck into the bathroom, splashed cold water on your face, and avoided the mirror. You ignored the growing knot in your chest.

You checked your phone again.

Six new messages.

One of them made you freeze. It was from an old friend.

[YOU AND JAKE ARE A THING????]

You didn't answer, you scrolled. Another one from an old classmate.

[holy shit]
[he's way hotter than ur ex.]
[good for u]

You sat on the floor. You scrolled again. And again.

Small town. Big mouths.

You closed your eyes and cursed under your breath, then your phone buzzed again.

jake sim: [morning]
jake sim: [where r u?]

You stared at the message for a few seconds, then typed back:

[we have a problem.]