I broke my heart
Loving you.

Not everything related to you is known to the world , not everything that you want is owned by you , not everything around you is yours and not everything you love is meant to love you back. All that one can do is never stop dreaming or never dream at all. Sometimes you are better off loving someone from far , sometimes you are better off being away , sometimes all you can do is dream. But sometimes you need to stop yourself from dreaming about something that you are never going to get . Sometimes you should know that one should be in their limits but then again aren't all boundaries and limits meant to be broken ?

Amaira Kapoor, a normal teenager who wants to explore. She wants to explore each and every phase of her life before there's no life that she can live. She wants to tick off each and every box of her bucket list. And there's nothing wrong in those wishes except one and that's expecting her best friend to fall in love with her.

Vihaan Shergill , neither a bad boy nor a good boy, he was somewhere in the middle. Someone who likes football and at the same time was extremely fond of physics. He believes in living in the moment and not someone who has a long bucket list. He's not someone on whom every girl dies but he has a different charm altogether.

Shanaya Sharma, a girl with devil's mind. She may not want to harm someone but she always wants what she once lays her eyes on. Someone who can use a person like tissue paper and then throw her away. But at the same time , her heart is not black , it's grey.

Three lives. Two relationships. And one year. Yes , only one year that ruined everything. Every damn thing.

Life is uncertain , with a lot of 'ifs' and 'buts' . That's life. Each and every decision made by a person is scanned and judged by society. That's life. Sometimes it's chaotic , sometimes it's unfinished. That's life. Once you may feel trapped and the next moment you may feel like a free bird. That's life. Sometimes you may have a Romeo-Juliet love story and sometimes you would have a Bunny-Naina love story. That's life.

"What are you guys doing? Jaldi karo time ho gaya hai !! Ma'am is going to come in the next 15 mins .... Complete this fast." I instructed all my juniors who were helping us to organise the fest. I had been running north , south , east , west and all other directions shouting and screaming everyone to complete everything on time. And that's what I was going to do on seeing some boys playing basketball on the field instead of doing their assigned duties. "Guyssss"

"Chilla mat meri maa . I am gonna be deaf soon if you scream so much." said my best friend, the footballer, the cassanova, Vihaan Shergill. Okay okay I admit it he's not a cassanova but then he's also not a heard. Quite a few girls have a crush on him. "Ball rakh aur gate pe hain na teri duty ?? Jaaa ." I screamed at him and he just rolled his eyes and did what I said not wanting to increase my anger. As I was about to move from there, Vihaan came and just dragged me to the gate where he was placed for his duty and took two chairs, he himself sat on one and patted the chair next to him asking me to sit.

I huffed and sat there. I mean who would deny sitting with their crush right !! Ya ya I have a hugeeee crush on my best friend. Of course my girl friends know about this but no one except them. I asked him , "What happened ??" He just shook his head and said, " Can we just sit and talk ?? We have half an hour before the fest begins and seeing the way you are screaming I am sure everyone has completed their work. So just sit and have a chat with me." I pulled my chair closer to his and just sat there silently for the next five minutes. None of us spoke a word, we just allowed the silence to speak and sometimes that's all that we want. Silence.

After what felt like eternity, he asked me "What is love Amaira ?" And I was wondering why is he asking such a question , "Woah , Vihaan Shergill is asking about love? Koi mil gaya kya tujhe?" He just questioned again ,"Amaira, what is love?"

Knowing that he was asking this not out of fun but very seriously, I just answered in one simple line which was enough for him to understand , "Love is when you significant one is worth every mile, when losing her feels like losing yourself and when it's an unconditional commitment. You don't find love, Vi . Love finds you."

Vihaan was not amused by her answer. He always knew Amaira had a deep understanding about everything and she was his go to person whenever he was in trouble. I noticed he was looking in a particular direction and it broke my heart into several pieces when I saw that he was staring at Shanaya, one of my close friends. By the look in his eyes I understood that I was going to lose him, it was just a matter of days. I always knew that my feelings were growing which shouldn't have happened but I couldn't help and fall more and deeper every time. And I knew what was gonna happen once this fest ends and that's exactly what happened!

Vihaan proposed Shanaya !! And me being the "supportive" best friend was the one who gave him the strength and the idea of how he should confess his feelings. Yes, you can call me stupid, you can call me mad, you can call me whatever you want to but what could I do ?? Try to separate them ?? Confess my feelings and break my heart to another level ?? No, none of the above things seemed right to me that time. I just believed in destiny.

Finally!! Finally I confessed my feelings to Shanaya !! I have always adored her ever since Amaira introduced her to me. What Amaira didn't know was that we had met a couple of times at some coffee shop or restaurant. I didn't intend to hide it from her but I didn't even feel like telling my personal life to her. Don't get me wrong here, I love Amaira as my best friend but sometimes you need privacy and that's exactly what I needed.

Currently I am searching for Amaira as we would be leaving together but I didn't find her ever since I proposed to Shanaya. As I was moving, I heard Shanaya call me from behind. She asked if we could leave, I was surprised at first as I was not supposed to leave with her but me being hopelessly in love just agreed and forgot about Amaira until I got a call at 9 pm from Amaira's mom.

"Hello aunty, everything alright ??" I asked. She asked me in a panicked voice, "Vihaan, is Amaira with you ?? She has not returned home and her phone is also switched off." That's when I realised what a mistake I had made. I had forgotten about Amaira. "Aunty, I will check with her friends. Don't worry she will be back." "Thank you Vihaan." was the reply I got and I hung up the phone.

I immediately called Kyra, her best friend to only find out that she's not with her. As she stayed near to our college she decided to check there while I called her other friends but found nothing. Approximately at 9:45 pm, aunty called and informed me that she's back home and was with Aanya,her other best friend, and her phone was dead. I immediately knew she was lying as I had called Aanya and she was not with her.

Time passed and as I had predicted I had completely lost Vihaan. Yes, I was jealous of Shanaya. Yes, I was hurt. Yes, I was ignored by my best friend. But I didn't find even an ounce of sorrow in Vihaan's eyes and that's when I knew that it's the end.
From that day onwards, I had all my feelings buried deep inside and tried to put on a fake smile in front of Kyra and Aanya who very well knew it was all an act. This continued for a long time, I tried to initiate conversation on Instagram, Whatsapp and even in school but got only one response "I am busy right now. Can we talk later?" And of course that later never came.

Shanaya and I used to talk but most of her talks would be related to Vihaan and eventually I was fed up with constant " Vihaan this , Vihaan that." And I just reduced my chats with her or basically stopped talking. It just amazed me that one relationship ruined everything. One person who I considered the closest to me just left. And with one of my very close friends, I just stopped having any sort of conversation. In this whole process of heartbreak, the only constant that I had were Aanya and Kyra. Both were with me throughout sometimes silently, sometimes explaining that I should let it out and sometimes being brutally honest. And that's exactly what I needed.

Aanya was someone who made me laugh no matter what, always by my side since we were in the same class, she used to make me laugh by talking utter nonsense but that's her and I adore her no matter what. Kyra is the exact opposite, she understood the situation and just pushed me to move on, she was someone whom I could have heart to heart talks with and I can also say most honest replies came from her.

It was just one of my usual days when I found out the shocking truth about Shanaya. She was talking to her best friend about why she was dating Vihaan. It shocked me to hear that she was only dating him because she was forced by her best friend. It confused me. Why would her best friend force her ? And the next second I got my answer. It was only because Vihaan had got to know that Shanaya's best friend who was also girlfriend of Vihaan's best friend had cheated on her boyfriend. And Vihaan had only kept his mouth shut because Shanaya had requested him to not disclose this secret using the girlfriend card.

I just couldn't believe it. I decided it was best to confront Vihaan and that's exactly what I did.

"Vihaan I need to talk with you. Urgently."

"Sure. Tell what happened?"

I pulled him to the side where no one could hear what we were talking.

"Shanaya is only using you."

"What !?"

"Yes. I just heard her conversation with her best friend who is also your best friend's girlfriend. They were discussing how you fell for their trap and how Shanaya didn't allow you to disclose the secret to Abhi because she used her girlfriend card."

"Why would I believe you ? I can't after all you could be trying to break my relationship because you love me."

"What! Seriously Vihaan. You think this low of me. I didn't know that being in a relationship you would change this drastically. And about me being in love with you. Then yes, I love you but I am not selfish to do such a cheap thing. I can accept the fact and that's what exactly I have done. And also not to forget you were also in love with me okay !?"

"How are you so sure !?"

"Well use your brain. You don't tell my bestfriend that you were in love with me and not expect her to tell me this. Are you dumb?"

"Well yes I was in love with you. Big deal. I moved on and of course didn't use such cheap tricks."

I was about to reply when we heard claps from behind us. It was none other than Shanaya. She looked angry and hurt as well. Shit she has heard our confession and took it in a wrong way. But why hurt she didn't love Vihaan !!

Shanaya walked to us and said, "It's done Vihaan." That's it and she walked out.

But she turned back when I said , "At least have the guts to tell the truth."

"Well the truth is that yes I was using him but I had started loving him. But you know what he said when I asked him to choose between you and me. He said it would always be you. And that's when he's dating me and not talking with you. His reason to choose you was that you were his best friend and it's always best friend over girlfriend be it boy or girl."

I was shocked and looked at Vihaan. I told Shanaya, "Well he didn't believe me when I told him the truth so it's pretty much clear that he loves you. So just don't ruin it because he used to love me. You both clearly love each other and believe me I am no where in the middle."

"That's what you think. He is not even affected by the break up. In fact I don't blame him. I blame you. Who told you to tell him the truth !? I would have told him or not .... It was my right. We were happy whether he chose you or me. You were out of his life then why enter again and ruin everything for me Amaira?"

And that's when Vihaan finally speaks, "Shanaya you very well know she's not to blame. Yes I didn't believe her but after knowing that our whole relationship was a lie, it's not her fault. She did what any friend would have done. And it's not you who's done. It's me. It's over."

With that he dragged me along with himself out of the place. I jerked his hand and asked him to leave as I didn't want to talk with him. It took him a couple of weeks to make me accept him as my friend again. But it was not the same, we both knew about my feelings and it didn't help that's until he proposed. Not in the most romantic way, over a text. But they say all good things come to an end and that's what happened. It came to an end in 5 months. In these five months too, nothing much happened. We only behaved as best friends, nothing more. We weren't that lovey dovey couple. This time the difference was that we not only ended our relationship but also our 5 years long friendship. And that's what broke my heart. I hated myself for entering that relationship. I hated myself for accepting that proposal. I hated myself for loving my best friend. I hated myself more because I couldn't do anything but that's how it was supposed to end. It was supposed to be Beautifully Flawed.

_____________________________________________

I hope you all like it. Please leave your reviews in the comments section 💜

The ending will always remain like this. It's actually a real story with a little changes here and there 🥺

Stay safe
Aarohi ✨

Also an English song here which relates to the story

(Here is your author fangirlling again 😂🙈 .... Well I love them too much 😭❤️)