1,372,980 likes
sadiesink_ hi

comments are disabled on this post.

— ★ —

( FAYE )

"i'm so proud of you!" the girls english accent bursts through the phone's speakers, with such volume that even i can hear her. sadie gets startled, swiftly moving away from the phone with a gasp.

"oh my god, calm down mills" she chuckles. "but thank you"

i observe from my bed as the redheaded girl paces around my room, responding to dms and calls from people who are close to her and want to offer their congratulations on her coming out.

every now and then, sadie lets out a sigh of exhaustion before picking up another call, causing me to laugh.

"i should've never posted" sadie rolls her eyes with a smile prior to setting her phone on silent mode, joining me on the bed.

"isn't this a good thing, though?" i shrug my shoulders. "it shows how much people care about you"

sadie breaks off the momentary silence while half-laying on the bed, using one arm to support herself. "did no one congratulate you?"

i repeat her gesture, facing her, a glow amidst the dim lit room. "not really, it just wasn't a big deal to them... not to me either"

she nods, briefly shifting her gaze from my eyes to my lips, then back to my eyes. an action that's been recurring a lot lately. i wonder why.

we fall back into the comfortable silence. she drops her arm, settling to now lie on the bed. once again, i follow.

our faces are much closer than before, rekindling that feeling of her warm breath against my skin.

her lips, adorned with a subtle pink tint, slowly curl into a smile, accompanied by a soft breathy chuckle. the contagious sound infects me almost immediately, leading us both into the most quiet laughing fit.

as the silence returns, sadie breaks it off again. "what countries have you travelled to?"

"none"

"none?"

"no, i'm not rich like you" i scoff.

a giggle escapes her lips. "doesn't finn take you anywhere? do you stay here when he films?"

"yeah"

"why?"

"i don't know. i guess i'm scared" my voice lowers itself.

she furrows her brows with a chuckle. "what? like an airplane phobia or something?"

i decide to switch the topic. "what about you?"

"what countries have i been to?"

upon my nod, she lets out a sigh. "i don't even remember most of them"

my brows rise up. "oh damn"

she chuckles again as a wide smile makes it's way onto her face. "i don't wanna brag, but i think i may have actually seen the whole world"

"can you tell me one of your stories?"

"which one?"

"anything. any place that left a mark on you"

she thinks for a moment, then speaks. "well, there's this little village in italy, right by the coast, with houses painted in pastel colours. i spent a summer there. the sunsets were like paintings, and the gelato was just amazing"

i grin, captivated by the thought of spending time in a cozy village in italy. "that sounds amazing"

"it was" she starts with a big smile. "there was also this time in tokyo, where the city lights looked so cool. i visited a tiny ramen shop in an alley, the ramen was so good i wanted to cry"

i grin and shift closer to her, if that's even possible. "what's your most favourite memory from all your travels?"

sadie pauses, her voice softening. "hmm, probably the sunrise at machu picchu. the quiet beauty of it all, the feeling of being so small in the grand scheme of things, it was incredible"

the silence envelopes us again, this time allowing me to be the one to break it. "i wish i was like you"

the words linger in the air around us. sadies expression is one that's hard to make out, i assume she's confused.

my assumption is correct. "what do you mean?"

"you're perfect"

"i am?"

"yes. you look like an angel, act like an angel, and your life just seems perfect most of the time" i breathe out. "how do you do this?"

our eyes refuse to leave one anothers, her eyes shutting themselves close for a moment. "i'm not perfect, faye" she smiles. "i've got my problems too, you know?"

"i know that, ofcourse" i start. "but you're so magnetic as a person, everyone loves you"

"you're magnetic too" sadie states in a whisper.

"i'm not"

"you are, i don't know why you wish you were anyone but you. i adore you much more than you know, faye"

the room seems to hold its breath as we lock eyes, not another word being spoken from either end. her fingers intertwine with mine, neither eyes daring to look another way.

suddenly, sadies persona immediately changes, as if a switch is turned on. "anyways, let's go on insta live" she chimes, springing out of bed.

— ★ —

"hi finn" the pair of blue eyes scan the screen, reading through messages as they come.

"go away, finn" i flip off the phone camera, smiling at the chuckle that escapes sadies lips.

finnwolfhardofficial
ban faye

"i'm in the stream dumbass she can't do that"

i swallow my words as the redhead pushes me out of frame, off of the bed. "yes i can, actually"

finnwolfhardofficial
thank you

as the stream goes on, the tension between us somehow intensifies rather than easing itself. judging by some of the viewers remarks, they seem to pick up on it, especially now with this newfound information about sadie.

viewer
are they dating?

viewer
i feel like i'm thirdhweeling rn

viewer
is this your gf?? she's pretty

viewer
sadie could do way better ☠️

"someone just said you're out of my league" i bite the inside of my cheek, suppressing a grin.

"well, i am" she scoffs, earning a punch on the shoulder from me.

"everyone thinks we're dating"

sadie emits an obviously fake laugh, fidgeting with her hands. "no, we're just good friends"

"mhm" i nod, reading through more chats.

sadie suddenly gasps, startling me a little. "we should do eachothers makeup"

"i'm gonna make you look terrifying" i shake my head with a slight smirk.

i delicately apply the rosy blush on her face, the face that's mere inches apart from mine. we exchange glances in the mirror next to my bed, almost forgetting about the live audience.

people are already speculating about the nature of our relationship, acting as though it concerns them. our visible tension only adds to it, yet my focus refuses to leave the eyes which stole the ocean and captured it within them.

"how are your eyes so pretty?" my voice is barely above a hush.

sadie breaks into a smile. "thank you, faye"

something snaps in me. the same rush i had gotten just a few hours ago, which leads me to actually express my feelings. crazy, i know.

"it's so hard to focus when i'm around you"

she leans in closer to me, letting her breath flow through my ears. "we're on live, remember?"

i release a sigh while wearing a frown. she just grins, glancing at her phone to observe the chat, which was now blowing up with assumptions.

"guys, fayes just asking me about season 5 of stranger things. get your minds fixed"

my head motions in agreement, hoping nothing i said was heard. "yeah, byler spoilers"

— ★ —

"shit!" the redhead exclaims, snatching her phone as the livestream abruptly disconnects.

we breathe out with disappointment, observing the sudden darkness enveloping the room. the building has a power outage.

"this happens so much, lately" i groan.

sadie glances around with a grin. "yeah, but nothings really changed. your room is always dark, the lights are useless"

"true" my shoulders rise before i slump down onto the mattress.

sadie joins me, the two of us returning to our original position prior to the live stream.

"so, there's no internet?"

i nod at her inquiry. "none"

"what are we supposed to do?" she turns over and faces the ceiling, leading me to do the same.

"talk, maybe"

sadie hums, her eyelids shutting themselves close. "about?"

that certain rush still hasn't left me.
i release an exhale, before speaking softly.

"i still find it hard to trust you completely"

the silence is back, this time not so comfortable. it's almost like i can feel her thoughts, knowing already she's upset by me. her silence speaks loud and clear, hitting me like bullets.

"i apologised" is all she says.

"i know, i'm happy you did. it's just..."

"just what? what more do you want from me, faye? i'm doing all i can to make amends"

"i just can't shake this weird feeling of not trusting you. it's been eating at me"

she scoffs, the same scoff that's always escaping her lips as a joke now carries a whole other tone.

"dude, i said i'm sorry. why are you being like this? why can't we just move on?"

her voice reaches a higher volume, carrying mine along with it.

"it's not that simple"

"i thought you forgave me"

"i'm trying to, i really am. this doubt keeps coming back though-"

sadie snaps up, no longer wishing to lie down.

"this isn't fair, faye. i'm trying my best"

i follow her, sitting up straight. "i can't help how i feel"

"but you're making me feel like i can never make it right"

"trust takes time"

"i don't care. i can't keep feeling guilty for something I've apologized for"

her voice is low now, lifeless and montone. honestly, it's worse than when she was yelling.

my voice contrasts with hers. "well, i can't just fucking switch off my feelings, can i?"

"faye, i said i was sorry"

"no, stop saying that. you apologised, good, but that doesn't erase what you did. you ruined my life, sadie. you took away the most important thing of mine, then just came back into my life two months later crying for forgiveness, and now, you're-"

my yelling is cut off.

the tangled bundle of emotions is thrown right at me. the anger is washed away with confusion. if you were to ask me to predict her actions in this moment, this wouldn't even make the list.

her lips are warm, soft. the taste— that one strawberry tinted lip balm she lets me borrow.

maybe she just needed a way to shut me up, or maybe this is all a weird joke. nonetheless, i'm not being the one to pull away.

our lips move in a rhythmic motion, grasping onto the motives of one another. the kiss might just be a fusion of anger, to calm us down.

i hadn't even noticed my hands reach up to her hair, brushing through each and every strand. her hands, like always, are fixed on my waist.

she's the one to pull away.

my mind consists of a jumble of feelings, none of them containing the ability to be put into words. anger and hurt are still there, but so is a spark, something new, something leaving me wanting to explore what just took place.

my thoughts falter as i feel her touch, one of her hands stroking my face while the other brushes strands of hair away.

i look into her eyes, searching for answers. yet, i find nothing but an emotionless body of ocean.

"do you want me to stop?"

i nod, before shaking my head, implying both yes and no. i'm not sure.

she chuckles lightly, allowing our lips to meet once again, this time with much less gentleness.

our tongues fight for dominance, it seeming clear that i'll have to be the one to give up, which i do.

her smile is present within the kiss as she pulls me onto her lap, lifting off my shirt in the blink of an eye.

it doesn't take long for my mind to be entirely consumed by her. her lips, her smell, her taste, her.

someday, i'll come to regret this decision. that someday could be very soon, perhaps the next day. or maybe it could be never, and this could somehow work out, leaving me with something greater than myself emerged from a terrible choice.

★ authors note ,,

im writing one of the most important chapters with 2 hours of sleep and 0 effort im so sorru