Thump. Thump. Thump.

The throbbing in her head made it hard for her to focus as Ahsoka allowed herself, almost in a daze, to be guided back into the busy diner.

The thriving atmosphere filled with shouts and laughter only added to Ahsoka's splitting headache, but she hardly noticed.

She was tired.

Everything had just happened so fast that she hadn't really had time to process her external fatigue.

It wasn't only the physical exhaustion that succeeded crying, but the realization of her lack of planning that made her want to collapse into the nearest chair.

Part of her was grateful that Dex had chased her down and led her back inside, because she knew she wouldn't have turned around otherwise — but the other half of her didn't want to accept any sort of help from anyone.

If there was any one thing that Ahsoka Tano was sure of that night, even when she had nothing concrete to hold onto, it was that she hated being helpless.

It was a terrible feeling, she knew, and she had spent practically her whole life trying not to feel that way.

As a Jedi, she had dedicated her life to helping other people, not being helped, nor pitied, nor pathetic. And as Dex guided her through the diner, Ahsoka knew she was all three.

Of course, a charitable motive or just a being offering empathy toward a Jedi was not frowned upon — if anything, they relied on it, but Ahsoka had spent her years as a Jedi constantly trying to prove something to others.

Prove that she wasn't too young to be a Padawan.

That she would be a great Jedi Knight.

That she could handle complicated missions.

That she could make the Jedi Council approve of her.

And if she ever asked for help, she made it her last option — being one of the younger students in her classes meant she had to prove she was meant to be there, and asking for help immediately disproved it. Well, that had been Ahsoka's mindset as a youngling while watching the older Jedi in her classes. 

Now, as she almost glided in a dissociated sort of way through the packed sentients, Ahsoka realized that she didn't have to prove herself worthy to anyone else anymore.

And she really didn't know what to do with that information.

There was no more Jedi Council constantly looking over her shoulder; no more burning desire to impress them or seek their approval; no more Master to look up to; and no more friends to fight for.

Ahsoka Tano could vanish from the known galaxy, and it wouldn't have made a difference anymore — every single thing that she had ever done in her life was behind her, sitting at the crisp white structure atop the streets of Coruscant that she could never go back to. She had no purpose, no goal, no plan, and no incentive to keep moving.

Even when she had felt lost on the battlefield, she had been able to recall the friendly faces that warmed her chest and strengthened her resolve. Now, though, Ahsoka, who had always been taught to live her life for others in the most selfless way possible, had nothing to motivate her besides helping herself.

Still so wrapped up in her thoughts, a sudden jarring of her body made her snap back to reality as she realized she had accidentally bumped into a Tholothian. She murmured a quick apology before continuing on, still sensing Dex moving along right next to her.

She felt a lot smaller and a lot younger now that she was beside the Besalisk, and feeling that way did nothing to alleviate the burning shame of feeling helpless and pathetic that was making her stomach drop like a stone.

What am I even doing? She thought desperately, as she gazed around half-heartedly at the mixture of sentients crowding the room.

The pretty Twi'lek in front of her was doubled over laughing, her lekku bobbing up and down as fits of giggles racked her body, and Ahsoka felt a pang in her chest and a twist in her stomach that took her a minute to recognize as jealousy.

Ahsoka was slightly taken aback at the emotion and the situation that had warranted it. She had never really had a reason to be jealous of the life of another before — after all, she had been a Jedi, and that was all she had ever wanted to be. She'd had her place; her purpose; something she could keep going for and that made her happy and confident. Now, she wasn't even that. She was just Ahsoka Tano now: a civilian.

She must have looked miserable, for Dex placed his hand on her shoulder again and gently pushed her through the congregations of beings to a quieter corner next to a news board filled with clippings of bounties, wanted posters, and advertisements.

A cold draft blew through the open window next to them and Ahsoka shivered. She had left the Temple with nothing but the clothes on her back and a feeling of hopelessness — and neither of those things did well to stop the cold.

Forcing herself to stifle the shudder, she paused, finally taking in the racket of the room as individual aspects instead of a whole monotonous background.

"... and so I said to him — listen to this..."

"... and then she just laughed! Just ..."

"... down... Kid, are you there?"

Ahsoka blinked, pulled out of her concentration of the people around her and turned to face the Besalisk who was waving one of his four hands in front of her face.

It took her another few moments to process what he had said. Why don't you sit down?

"Oh. Yes. Thank you." She spoke, her voice sounding strange, even to her, as though she wasnt fully present.

The schreech of a chair being dragged across floorboards was muffled by the din of the lively room, and Ahsoka took her seat, still not entirely focused on anything besides the overwhelming feeling of loss, pain, and disorientation making her stomach twist, chest tighten, and head throb.

She was so wrapped up in her own mind's lack of conscience that she didn't even notice the absence of Dex's presence as he walked back toward the counter, nor the return of his presence a few moments later.

....

Dex plopped down in the chair opposite the clearly distressed girl. Frustratingly, he couldn't seem to recall her name. He crossed his arms and leaned back in his seat, studying the young Togruta who hadn't seemed to notice the glass of water and plate of food that had been placed in front of her moments before.

She just looked lost. Although she still kept her posture perfect and demeanor in control, the look of pain and confusion in her eyes did not match her exterior body language.

He cleared his throat and her eyes snapped up to him, almost in surprise, but not quite. She gave him a calculating look, almost as if she was trying to figure out what he wanted, before her gaze flickered down to the glass of water and muja muffin on the table.

Still, she didn't move, seemingly hesitant to accept the offering.

The self-control of a Jedi. How could I forget? Dex thought sarcastically.

"So," Dex leaned forward slightly, uncrossing his arms. "Who exactly are you?"

She was silent for a count of three, almost as if pondering the answer, or lack of it, that she should give him.

Then, "My name is Ahsoka. I met you a few years ago. Obi-Wan Kenobi introduced us." She leaned back in her chair, her gaze clearing a little bit of the disorientation as she met his eyes confidently, now matching her outward demeanor.

"Hmm." Dex hummed. "I remember. But you were a Padawan then, and now...?"

The lost look in her eyes was back, and Dex had effectively touched upon the subject that was the root of her pain.

"I was." Was her only response, clipped and to the point. The succinct tone of her voice made the pain behind the words obvious to Dex, and he leaned forward more, his curiosity growing at her lack of elaboration.

"So what are you now?"

She opened her mouth before closing it with a frown, and for the first time since Dex had seen her, her perfect posture wasn't so perfect anymore, as her shoulders slumped in a defeated sort of way.

"I... I don't know."

Dex studied her again as he leaned back. The way she said the words — she hadn't realized that she hadn't known yet, Dex observed. Her eyes became clouded again and he noticed her fingers picking nervously at a napkin on the table — a sign of her breaking Jedi resolve.

What do you do when a Jedi is upset? He racked his brain, though knowing there was no real answer — well, real answer he knew anyway. It seemed like the start of a terrible joke. What do you do when a Jedi is upset? Nothing! Jedi don't feel emotions, remember?

Well, this girl was obviously feeling emotion, but according to the limited information Dex had gathered, she wasn't exactly a Jedi anymore.

Well, Jedi like to think; to plan; to fix things. That would probably help them, right? He wondered, still studying the girl, who had straightened her posture again, even though her clouded eyes continued to gaze downcast at the floor.

Dex knew exactly what he wanted to ask: What happened? Why are you here? But it didn't seem very appropriate at the moment — instead he said, "Well, what do you want to be?"

She met his eyes again, and he could see the confusion churning in them — but also something else. Possibility. He had gotten her thinking.

The clouds in her blue eyes began to dissipate again and she opened her mouth to speak. Before she could even get one word out, though, she froze. Eyes fixed on something behind Dex, he saw fear, alarm, and then the same mix of pain and regret, multiplied tenfold, flash across her face.

Dex started forward, uncrossing his arms as he leaned toward her, looking at her in confusion, before turning his head to the notice board behind him which she seemed to be frozen by.

Suddenly, Dex was frozen too. There, not one meter away from their table, a slightly wrinkled and faded piece of paper was pinned to the board. Although it seemed to have been there for at least a week, the writing and picture on it were clear as day, even in the dimly lit diner.

Wanted: Ahsoka Tano
Dead or Alive
Prize: 100,000 republic credits.

Oh. Dex felt his stomach drop. He stayed there, staring at the poster, cursing his stupidity, and refusing to turn around to face the Togruta who's white facial markings were identical to the black and white print.

So she was the Jedi who they tried to sentence to death.

Dex slowly turned around in his seat to face the former Jedi.

In that mornings holonews, the very same name and face had appeared, talking about her acquittal and the whole framed scandal, before featuring another young face — a mirialan, then — who was supposedly the true saboteur.

Oh. He thought again, his gut twisting in sympathy for the girl still frozen in her chair, not even blinking as she read and reread the sign.

Dex cleared his throat awkwardly. "So... They kicked you out." He stated carefully.

The Togruta — Ahsoka, he had to remind himself, slowly shook her head, her eyes still gazing sadly at the wall behind him.

"Not quite. Though in a way, yes."

What? Dex thought, forcing his face to stay neutral instead of showing his frustrated confusion. What is it with these Jedi type and speaking in riddles?

He decided it was better not to say that out loud, and instead asked, "What do you mean?"

Her eyes flickered back to his face and the steal was back in them. "I mean I left." She said with conviction. It was something she was sure of, Dex realized, when she wasn't quite sure if anything anymore. "I couldn't stay there anymore. Not after..." She waved her hand subtly as her eyes dimmed again, a gesture that was supposed to capture the betrayal and pain she felt because of the situation she had been forced into. "... what happened..." she finished dejectedly, deciding that her animated movement wasn't much better of an explanation.

A few seconds of silence passed before she spoke again. "I mean, they expelled me before the trial, but when they asked me to come back..." she trailed off again, crossing her arms and leaning back in her chair, eyes trained defeatedly on the floor. "... I couldn't..." she finished with a frown aimed at the dusty floorboards.

Dex gazed at her sadly. "That's the thing about betrayal," he spoke into the silence that seemed to envelope them in a bubble, separating them from the lively din and light environment of the rest of the room. "It only ever comes from a friend." The words seemed to drape over them like a wet blanket, suffocating them in a heavy atmosphere as she looked up to finally meet his eyes, and he knew she already understood what he meant.

"Your enemy is your friend the same as your friend is your enemy." She spoke softly. "It's only a matter of perspective."

Her eyes focused on the piece of paper behind him again, almost like if she looked away she would be swept up in a current not knowing how to swim.

The two sat there for a few minutes in silence, Ahsoka still fixated on the wanted poster — though her resolve seemed to harden the longer she looked at it — (Dex really didn't understand those Jedi type)— and Dex leaning back with his arms crossed, ever so often moving his gaze up from the table to search her face, marveling at her resolve and demeanor, before focussing them back on the now-cold and still untouched muja muffin sitting in front of the former Jedi.

This time when he searched her face, he realized her paling complexion — the poor girl probably hadn't eaten in who knew how long, and he knew from the barely noticeable tear tracks on her face that she had been crying — meaning she was probably dehydrated.

"You should eat." He told her, breaking the silence. "And drink." He pushed the plate closer to her and her gaze dropped down to the meal in front of her.

She hesitated for a moment, then seemed to decide he was right. "Thank you." She told him before taking a long sip of the water.

Dex leaned forward in his seat again as she picked a piece off the muffin with her fingers and brought it to her mouth.

"So why come here?" He asked the question that had been burning on the tip of his tongue for the past few minutes.

She finished chewing slowly before crossing her arms and resting them on the table as she leaned forward.

"I'm still trying to figure that out myself." She said, studying his face with her piercing blue eyes. "I guess this place is really the only other familiar thing I know on Coruscant. Maybe it was just luck?" She shrugged, moving her gaze back to the floor beside the table.

Dex chuckled, recalling his old friend. "Obi-Wan always said there's —"

"No such thing as luck." She finished his sentence for him with the ghost of wry smile, reciting the words as though she had heard them many times before, which Dex guessed she had. "I know.... but I know someone who told me otherwise..."

She still kept her gaze on the floor, but the sad, clouded look was back, dimming the vibrant color and making her seem almost older than she really was — like an old war veteran recalling a memory of a fallen comrade.

And then Dex remembered that she had been a Jedi fighting on the front lines of the Clone War and that his analogy wasn't so far-fetched.

A lump formed in Dex's throat and his stomach twisted. It's so messed up, he thought. Why did a child have to fight in a war that they didn't create? What had this girl seen? This kid, a young girl in her teens, had probably seen more death and destruction and inhumanity than anyone in the diner combined.

Dex's heart went out to her — not only in sympathy, but in a new sense respect as well. Next time he ever got scammed out of a bet, or lost a game of sabaac to a cheater, he decided he would think of Ahsoka Tano, and, hopefully, the minor inconveniences wouldn't seem so major. anymore.

::::

Alright, third chapter done! I really hope you liked it, and please leave any comments, suggestion, or criticism!

How was Ahsoka's and Dex's characters — did they stay in character? Was this chapter too boring (maybe it didn't do much for the plot)?

I think I also focused a lot more on the internal conflicts again rather than the external, hence why the diner wasn't really described as much. Also, it started out in Ahsoka's pov, and then switched to Dex's... was that okay?

Also, this is unedited, so I apologize for any and all mistakes.

Anyway, thanks for reading! Bye!

10/4/20

Word count: 2923