Wolf moon [noun] - the name for the first full moon of the year, in reference to the increased howling of wolves in the depths of winter.

author's note: thank you so so much for 10k reads! i have been furiously writing to get this chapter out (my longest yet i think) and also the most revealing one! enjoy!

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The new year was supposed to signal a new beginning, but it had been eclipsed by Kane's realisation that the spell intended our doom, or more so, my doom.

Two weeks had passed under a looming cloud where I felt like I was walking on eggshells around Kane. His realisation had shaken him more than it did me, and I didn't know how to mitigate the impact. The upcoming full moon had strained things even more. We were still spending time together, but there was something different about his touch—hesitant like he was scared he was going to hurt me.

Things were beginning to weigh heavily on him, which naturally meant he was withdrawing from everyone emotionally. In those two weeks, he had only smiled three times. The pack assumed he was stressed about something he wasn't telling them about, and they weren't wrong. Telling his pack that a fatal spell had been cast on him was out of the question. He didn't need his leadership questioned or to seem weak in front of the pack.

No one in their right mind would challenge a wolf who had the mark of an alpha, but the last thing we needed was rumours to start spreading that the Alpha Kane was vulnerable. In all honesty, he was at his strongest physically, but there was a storm going on in his head—the kind that made him silent, and that brought a sense of unpredictability even I couldn't figure out.

It was the day before the wolf moon, January 2nd, and things were starting back up again. As a pack, we had enjoyed Christmas and New Year's, and while it felt weird being away from my family, the holiday season was nice. Kane had only smiled on Christmas, New Year's Eve and New Year's Day. I was watching him closely to see if I could add to my count.

The snow crunched underneath my boots as I made my way to the training grounds. Kane and his warriors would lead a training session every day for those of age. The safety of the pack depended on defence, and everyone knowing how to fight. My old pack were good, but my new one was better and it was easy to see why.

There were twenty-five wolves gathered on the grounds, split into groups of five with each warrior instructing them. When Kane caught my scent, he looked over his shoulder. His arms were folded across his chest and I didn't react to the way his shoulders tensed when he looked at me. There was something he wasn't telling me. I knew that much when he went from wanting to prove that I was safe with him, to almost avoiding me.

I walked up to him from behind and slid my hand across his back. I stepped up on my tiptoes and gave him a soft peck. He exhaled through his nose and leaned closer to me for a moment. I wasn't ashamed to admit that I knew what made him putty in my hands, or that I would do it on purpose. "Hi," I murmured against his lips.

He forced his eyes open. "You okay?"

I nodded and trailed my fingers over his crossed arms. I gently gripped his hand and pulled it to turn him to face me. His open posture allowed me to wrap my arms around his body. He shivered. We were both touch-starved. "Better now that I'm here. I thought I'd join your session today. I just finished editing the photos I took for that wedding on New Year's Eve."

His gaze slowly trailed over my face, and he lifted his hand to brush his thumb across my bottom lip. I knew he wanted to kiss me properly, and he almost did before a groan sounded through the air. We both turned to look at one of the teenagers, Oliver, who had been flipped over Finn's shoulder.

Kane sighed and stepped out of my embrace to address them. "You let him get too close to you without blocking, Oliver. How many times have I told you not to let your guard down? He's not your beta when you're fighting," he snapped with a slightly irritated tone.

Oliver stared at him for a few seconds before lowering his head apologetically. "I'm sorry, Alpha."

I glanced at Finn who was watching Kane with a frown on his face. I guessed that wasn't the first time Kane had snapped at Oliver. He was more irritable lately, and the shifting energies with the upcoming full moon weren't helping. I was sure the moon was going to have an adverse effect on us again. I was fine, better than Kane, but there was an uneasy feeling in my chest that I couldn't shake.

My luna instincts kicked in when I stepped forward. "Why don't we show Oliver what to do again? Stop me from getting too close to you and floor me," I offered. It wasn't lost on me that keeping me at arm's length was what Kane had been doing for the past two weeks.

He looked at me and the refusal was on the tip of his tongue. He didn't have an excuse since his arm had finally healed 3 weeks after the break—perks of our quicker healing.

"We'll spar only, Kane, or are you worried a luna can floor her alpha?" I kept my tone light to show him I wasn't seriously challenging him. I was missing his playfulness already.

"I don't want to hurt you, Rina." He frowned.

I gestured to Finn. "I don't have to spar with Finn, do I?" I joked.

The thought of another man touching me, even if platonically, sparked possessiveness in him. He immediately shook his head. "No."

I unzipped my jacket with a blooming smile. He was wearing just a shirt and shorts despite the cold, but I knew training was keeping him warm. I stood in front of him and could tell he was scared of accidentally harming me. I thought of touching him again but decided against it. He didn't need his guard down right now.

I kept myself light on my feet as we began circling each other. "This is the first time we're sparring with each other," I said, feeling the happiness flood through me. It was nice to be doing something with him.

"You're a skilled fighter," he replied, examining me and watching me for any sudden movements.

"Skilled enough to win against you?"

For the first time in two weeks, he chuckled. "I love your optimism, baby."

I felt warm all over. "Baby?" I echoed, "Are you trying to play dirty?"

I bounded forward and took a shot at him. He blocked it with a hand around my wrist and let me go, bouncing back on his feet.

"I wouldn't dream of it," he responded. "Is that all you got?"

His challenge sparked competitiveness in me, and I wanted to show him the fighting spirit that was in my blood. A beta turned luna.

I kept my arms close to my body to protect myself as I tried to gently land a few hits. He dodged them all and didn't let me get too close to him. I huffed, part of me knowing that I wouldn't ever win a fight against him, but hell if I didn't at least try. Maybe I had to play dirty.

"Give me a chance to play defence now," I suggested, drawing back.

He became serious. "Tell me if I hurt you in any way, okay?"

I nodded. "Okay." I beckoned him close with a wave of my hand. "Come on."

In a few seconds, I saw for myself why Kane was such a feared alpha. He had strength and speed. He was obviously holding ninety per cent of his strength back when he swung a few times. I easily blocked his swings.

"You're taking it easy on me, baby," I quipped, holding his gaze. All my focus was on him.

Desire sparked in his eyes and I knew I had him where I wanted. When he swung again, I parried the thrust of his fist and leaned in to kiss him as a counter. I prematurely thought victory was mine when his gaze dropped to my parted lips. In a flash, his leg hooked around the back of mine and he swept me off my feet, holding me by my jumper to slow my fall to the ground.

My body sank into the snow and I gasped in shock as I realised he had seen right through me.

"That was cute," he laughed, "but you can't kiss all your opponents." He turned to face the group that I had honestly forgotten was there. "Rule number one of fighting—never let your guard down."

I couldn't feel embarrassed by my failed attempt when it had made him laugh. It sounded like a melody I would never get tired of hearing. I couldn't leave it at that, though, so when he offered me his hand, I took it.

And pulled him down to me.

He fell on top of me with a grunt, and quickly held himself up. I gazed up at him and tried to contain my laughter. His hands were flat against the snow around my head, but I was sure he couldn't feel the cold as he stared back at me. And slowly but surely, a soft smile graced his face.

"You're crazy, you know that?" his breathing slowed.

"For you," I confessed. I miss you.

His eyebrows raised and he looked overcome. He lowered his head and locked our lips gently. The rest of the world faded away with the feel of his mouth moving against mine. He hadn't kissed me properly in two weeks, so I felt rejuvenated again.

At that thought, I slid my hand into his hair and the other against his upper back. I breathed him in and deepened the kiss for a few moments before he reluctantly pulled away.

"We're not alone," he sighed, slowly lifting himself off me.

My face warmed when I remembered where we were. The group were looking in all different directions and I was sure one girl had found a sudden interest in the clouds. When I took his hand again, I let him pull me to my feet. "Right..." I wrung my hands together. "Well, Oliver, I hope that was useful. You'll get it next time."

Oliver looked like a deer caught in headlights, and quickly nodded. "Keep my guard up."

I glanced at Kane and didn't blink. "I should go."

Finn quickly replied, "Stay, Luna." He smiled but it seemed slightly uneasy. I was beginning to pick up on my betas' mannerisms. Finn and Carmen were extremely similar. This particular smile was begging me to stay.

I figured he noticed Kane's sudden change in mood too.

"They can show you all they've learned so far," he added, slapping a hand onto Oliver's shoulder.

I nodded and smiled back. "Okay. I'd like that." I linked my fingers with Kane's. "Why don't you try again Oliver?"

He looked wearily at Finn. Finn gently shook him. "You've got this, come on."

I gave him an encouraging smile, and it seemed to be all he needed. He faced Finn one more time and successfully kept upright. Then, the rest of them broke into pairs with one person from each group facing the warriors, Finn, Callum, Rollo, Jack and Taron.

For the first time in two weeks, the storm was silent.

—————

The next day, Kane was nowhere to be seen.

He hadn't been in the house in the early morning, which was typical if he wanted to go for a run before breakfast. But when he hadn't returned to eat, I knew something was up.

I texted a few times during the day with no response, and once it hit late afternoon, with one hour left until sunset, I officially began to worry. I decided to leave the house to visit Finn and Carmen.

Their house wasn't far from Kane's, walking distance, which I covered in ten minutes. The lights were on, and when I knocked, Carmen opened the door.

"Luna!" she exclaimed with a bright smile. It dimmed when she sensed my anxiety. "Are you okay?"

"Have you seen Kane today?" I asked.

"You know," she started, "I think Finn said something about checking the borders today. I'm not sure when he said they'll be back."

Checking the borders?

It was twice now that Finn and Kane had mysteriously disappeared and had something to do on a full moon. What was going on?

I suddenly noticed she looked as if I had caught her on the way out. "What are your plans for the evening?"

She glanced down at her zipped-up jacket. "I thought I'd go on a walk. Would you like to join?"

My head slowly tilted in confusion. "Tonight is the wolf moon. You guys don't go on a pack run for it?"

The first full moon of the year was named and generally known as the wolf moon because of the increased howling of wolves due to the scarcity of food during winter. It could still be heard from regular wolves, but our species had come a long way from staying wild.

It was a tradition across many packs, if not all, to honour the wolf moon with a run that reminded us where we came from. In honour of wild wolves.

She nodded. "The full moon doesn't take effect for another hour. I think Alpha Kane and Finn will sit this year out."

I almost didn't know what to say. "The pack will run without their alpha and beta?"

Carmen's lips thinned into an awkward smile. "I'll be there and so will you, right? You're our luna."

I blinked, stunned. I had a feeling something was wrong. "Carmen—is there something you're not telling me?"

She slowly shook her head. "No. What makes you think that?"

I laughed incredulously. "Both our mates are AWOL for the second full moon in a row, and Kane hasn't answered any of my texts all day. You're hiding something from me—you all are."

"I'm sure they'll be back tonight, Luna," she replied.

I stared at her and frowned. "Please. I know there's something you're not telling me."

She faltered and avoided my gaze. "I have nothing to tell."

Disappointment flooded through me. I wasn't sure what it was, but it must have been something to do with the full moon. What was so bad that they wanted to hide it from me two months in a row? I didn't look away from Carmen for a long moment until I realised she wasn't going to tell me anything.

"Fine," I huffed, "I'll find him myself."

"Rina—"

I swiftly turned on my heel and walked in the other direction, leaving her standing in her open doorway. It was quickly getting dark and I stood outside Kane's house feeling lost. If we had marked each other, I would be able to find him easily through our bond. All I could feel was that he was still in our territory. I sighed, trying to think of what to do when my wrist started to warm up.

My heart dropped at the indication of oncoming pain. I looked up at the sky and saw the full moon on the horizon. It was starting. Why would he leave me by myself?

I pulled my jacket sleeve up and looked at his name on my wrist. It was glowing and not burning. I shook it off and turned back to the house. I was going to track him with his scent. As soon as I stepped foot into the house, it pulsed. I felt a tugging in my body, like my instincts were telling me it was pulsing for a reason. I turned around, closing the front door behind me. It began to glow again as I slowly walked forward.

I soon realised the brand was leading me to him. It pulsed when I faced the wrong direction and glowed when I was on the right track. As the full moon rose in the night sky, it began to burn. I quickened my pace, and before I knew it, I was standing in front of The Old Castle.

I immediately picked up on Kane's stronger scent...and Finn, Callum, Jack, Rollo and Taron's. The castle doors were open.

"Luna, you really shouldn't be here."

I turned around to see Carmen. She looked worried. "He's here. Why?"

"Please. Let's just go to the pack run."

I shook my head adamantly. I lifted my wrist for her to see it. "This led me here for a reason. I'm going to find him."

She couldn't reply because I headed in and picked up my pace. The burning intensified and I gritted my teeth. It led me to a winding staircase, and I knew it was the right place when Carmen expressed disagreement. I descended and when I reached the bottom, I came to a black door.

Finn pulled it open before I could.

"Luna. Please go back with Carmen."

I tried to look over his shoulder, but he towered over me. I shook my head. "No." I wrapped my hand around my burning wrist. It was going to quickly become unbearable. I was surprised it hadn't already. "I need him and he's here. Where is he?"

I could feel his presence now.

Carmen came behind me. "I tried, Finn."

He looked behind me at his mate, and I took the opportunity to push past him while he was momentarily distracted. My heart sank when I finally saw Kane. We were standing in an expansive room and by the farthest wall, he was kneeling on the floor with his head down.

His arms were raised and his hands were in chains.

The rest of the warriors came and formed a wall in front of me. I stared at them, bewildered. "What are you doing? Why is he chained?" I yelled, trying to circumvent them.

"Luna, it isn't safe. You need to go," Finn implored, stopping me from going to Kane.

"No! I'm not leaving him like that! What the hell is wrong with you all? He's your alpha. This is treason!" I tried to push through them to no avail. They were like a solid wall.

Callum settled his hands on my shoulders. "Luna. You need to trust us. This is for everyone's safety."

My response died on my tongue when Kane's low growl sounded through the room. It reverberated around the room. The chains creaked from the ceiling. He was slowly pulling at them.

When they turned to look at him, I took my chance. Finn tried to grab me by my jacket, but I was too fast for him. I rushed towards Kane but stopped in my tracks when he snapped his head up. His eyes were ablaze and his canines had descended. The look in his eyes was wild.

"Kane," I gasped, covering my mouth with my fingers.

He snarled as if he didn't recognise me. He was blacking out.

I tentatively stepped forward.

"Luna," they all protested at the same time.

"I'm his mate," I snapped. "He would never hurt me."

I took another step, and another until I kneeled in front of him. The chains were holding him back and I held my breath. We had been through this before. To help me through it, he had said my name. Maybe the key to getting him out of his black out was saying his.

"Kane," I softly said. I lifted my hand slowly.

He growled and snapped his teeth together.

"Kane," I repeated, holding his gaze.

Familiarity sparked in his fiery eyes. He suddenly screwed his eyes shut and whipped his head down. The sound that came out of his mouth sounded more like a groan than a growl. "Go...go!" he spoke through gritted teeth, raising his head. The blaze had dimmed slightly. "Mari...I can't..."

"Kane," I breathed out. He still wasn't himself.

A groan of pain fell from his lips and he pulled at the chains again. I finally realised they were chains of silver. His skin was raw and bleeding. I wasn't sure where my heart was now.

"It's hurting him!" I cried, looking at them over my shoulder.

"Silver is the only thing that stops him from shifting," Finn argued. "Please, don't test it. You need to come back over here."

They all seemed like they wanted to drag me towards them. They didn't dare go closer to him.

I turned to face him and hesitantly raised my hand to cup his face. His eyebrows drew close and he whined lowly. It looked as if he was trying to stop himself from shifting. His wolf was fighting to come out. This must have happened the day he chased me in the woods.

Even though I didn't want it to, the fear suddenly flooded through me. The spell.

I almost withdrew my hand, eager to listen to Finn, when Kane whispered, "Rina. I need you."

"I'm here, Kane," I replied, sliding closer to him, "I'm here."

His eyes flashed between amber and fiery gold, like he was fighting with all his might. "Make it stop," he pleaded. "Make the pain stop."

I glanced at Finn. "Take the chains off him."

Finn shook his head adamantly. "I can't do that."

The frustration burned in me. "Take them off him," I growled.

He frowned. "I won't do it."

I turned to Kane when his breathing became heavy. I cupped his face with both hands. "Kane, I need you to stay with me, okay? That's the only way the pain will stop." I held his gaze and nodded with him. "Okay?"

"O-okay," he rasped.

His pain broke my heart. The silver had temporarily weakened him, so I felt comfortable enough to pull him into a hug. His body sank against me, and the chains creaked again.

"Rina, no," he protested after a few seconds. "You need—" his growl cut him off. He drew back out of my embrace. "You need to go before I hurt you."

"You won't hurt me, Kane," I rebutted. "You can stay in control. I believe in you."

His eyes were changing colour. "Go!" he boomed.

"Rina, please!" Carmen begged.

My mistake was breaking eye contact with Kane and looking away.

Within a blink of an eye, he had yanked the chains straight from the ceiling and wrapped me in an iron-clad hold. All I could feel was the shackles digging into my back and I stiffened when he bared his canines.

I couldn't do anything when he sank them deep into my neck.

My lips parted but no sound came out as I felt his canines pierce flesh.

I felt frozen in my place as I realised he had done something irreversible. It wasn't supposed to happen like this.

He had marked me.