warning: suicide mentions, abuse, sad stuffs. Weird cross between vent fic and me wanting to base something off of a song. Idk, I'll edit it up in the morning. Expect fluff sometime tomorrow to make things better ;)

-

Ryan took a deep breath, opening up the door to the rooftop. Today was the day.

He walks out to the railing and gently places a hand on it, looking out at the scenery before him. Buildings and roads stretched out as far as the eye could see, people were going about their own business and paying no mind to the rooftop.

And to his surprise, there was a girl up here with him. Her hair was in two messy braids, tears streaming down her face, and a small stuffed animal in her hands.

The thing that stuck out to Ryan most was that she was on the other side of the railing, as if she were about to jump.

Ryan doesn't pay any mind to his own plans or any kind of common sense. He leaps out to grab her with a cry of "Don't do it!"

The girl whirls around to face him, looking just as scared as he is. Ryan quickly pulls her close to the railing, closer to safety.

He, admittedly, has no idea why he decided to scream out at her. He was here to do the same fucking thing, for crying out loud! He huffs bitterly and finds himself glaring up at her. "What the fuck do you think you're doing?"

The girl laughs weakly, somehow still shedding tears despite looking like she's cried every waking moment of her life. "He left me," she whispers. "Marcel left me."

"That's it?" Ryan wants to scream. "You're up here for such a lame reason! You're worth so much more than Marcel ever will be," he chokes out. "Go home. You don't deserve to be here."

To his surprise, the girl simply nods. "You're right. I'm feeling better now, thank you for listening," she says and vanishes.

Ryan doesn't question it. He stares out at the never-ending cityscape before him, takes a deep breath, and walks back inside.

He shouldn't be up here for a stupid reason either. Might as well go home and walk Buddy.

-

The second time he comes up to the rooftop, it's with a new reason and a heavy heart.

The second time he comes up here, he's met with someone here before him yet again.

This day is windy and snowy, in the dead middle of winter. The rooftops are all covered in a thick blanket of snow, and the bitter cold nips at Ryan's face, making the warm tears feel prickly against his skin.

It takes him perhaps a millisecond to recognize what the boy is going to do. And despite his own intentions, he screams out at this one, too.

"Hey! Don't do it!"

It's not the most effective thing to say, but it catches the other's attention and that's all Ryan needs.

The boy before him is small and round, big brown eyes red and puffy with tears staining chubby cheeks. A panda hat sits upon his head, a light dusting of snow upon it, telling Ryan how long the poor thing's been out here.

"Hey," Ryan whispers with a gentle voice, "Come on. Come back over the railing... please come back."

"Why should I," the boy sobs. "Everyone ignores me, everyone points and laughs and steals and everything hurts," he wails. "Nobody at school takes me seriously, and I can't do a thing about it!"

Ryan swallows nervously, a sense of sickening familiarity coming over him. It was almost like he's been here before. He does his best to smile, and carefully takes hold of the boy's hand.

"Hey. Come on. What do they matter? I'm sure you're loved plenty at home. There's always dinner waiting on the table, you know. There's always someone out there who loves you. And if there isn't," he says, "I'll be one of those people."

The boy looks up at him nervously, before sniffling and wiping tears with the back of his sleeve. He climbs back over the railing, Ryan having to save the kid from falling flat on his face.

He sniffles once more, and gives a (clearly fake) smile at Ryan. "I'm cold and hungry," he mumbles.

And with that, he was gone.

-

This is how it went on. Every time Ryan would run out of reasons, every time he would return to the rooftop, there was someone new there. A new person, a new story, a new reason.

Ryan would do the same thing every time. He listened to their tale, and made them turn away.

It was ironic. A suicidal boy goes up to the rooftop and ends up talking others out of the same thing he's been trying to do for weeks now. But if he didn't stop them, who would?

Today was no different. A nice, clear sunny day with not a cloud in sight brought Ryan out to the rooftop. Today wouldn't be such a bad day to die, now would it?

This one was a boy in a blue hoodie, with messy brown hair like his and a hockey mask in his bandaged hands. The fact that he knew what those bandages and mask were hiding sent chills down Ryan's spine.

Almost as if he knew what Ryan was waiting for, he speaks with no warning.

"I'm tired. I'm tired of the scars and the bruises, and I'm tired of the broken bones that grow every single time I go home. So I came up here instead."

Ryan feels a familiar burn on his arms, and the empty stare the one in blue sends him makes him want to puke from the way he sees himself reflecting back at him.

It's the same look he would give himself late at night while breaking down in the bathroom. It's the same look, the same blank, empty gaze he gives the world after fixing himself up in front of his locker with makeshift first aid kits.

It's the same look he wished he would never have to see on another human being. And the fact that he's seeing even the tiniest bit of it makes him sick to his stomach.

And god, he knows he's an idiot. If he's suffering just the same, what right does he have to tell this guy what to do? He doesn't have any reason to listen to Ryan! For fuck's sake, they might as well jump off together!

Despite everything running through his mind, Ryan laughs and chokes out a small, weak, "please."

It's not the right thing to say. They both know this. There were probably a million things Ryan could have said, and he manages to choose the worst possible thing. Go figure.

"Why should I? It's not worth it. Might as well make it all end, shouldn't I?" The boy in blue looks at him pitifully.

Ryan stays silent for a moment, thinking. He can't think of anything to say and it hurts him. For once, it seems that Ryan has bitten off more than he could chew.

One glance at the boy sends a wave of resentment through him. He sighs bitterly and turns away, crossing his arms.

"Just go away," Ryan mutters. "You make me feel like I'm staring in the mirror and I can't stand it. Just go somewhere else, please."

The boy doesn't say a word. He simply puts the mask on, turns away, and leaves.

Ryan realizes very quickly that the boy is crying as much as he is, only his tears are hidden by the mask. He pushes away any feelings bubbling up within him and forces himself to go about his own business as usual.

He'll end up back here one way or another. It didn't really matter anymore.

-

This was it, wasn't it?

For the very first time, Ryan is up here all alone. There's nobody to get in his way here. Nobody to stop or interfere.

Ryan finds it all to be incredibly stupid. The boy who sits up here and preaches kindness and generosity and life can't seem to follow his own advice. What a fucking hypocrite he is.

There's no more will left to live. He has nobody who likes him at school, home isn't an option and he hardly has a family to begin with. And if nobody was up here for him to stop, then does he really serve a purpose in life?

To him, the answer was no.

The scars on his body told him everything he needed to know, and the fall from the rooftop seems more and more tempting by the second.

He braces himself. The tears are flowing freely, his favorite hoodie is on, and he's not even a second away from jumping when the door opens and a voice cries out.

"Hey! Don't do it, please!"

Before he can even process what's going on, a hand turns him around and Ryan is met with blonde hair and blue eyes shiny with tears.