Adora's POV

BEFORE YOU READ THIS CHAPTER, I RECOMMEND YOU LOOK BACK ON CHAPTER 32 TO GET A UNDERSTANDING OF THE INFORMATION!

My body froze as my eyes laid upon the scattered papers throughout the small proximity of the room that Catra and I were in. The first thing that I saw was Catra huffing and puffing on her knees in an attempt to collect them.

I dropped to my knees and grabbed them, but of course, it was snatched out of my hand before I was even able to take a glance at it.

"What..are these?" My voice cracked.

Catra's eye twitched as she looked at me with..guilt? Was it guilt? No, it seemed like it was anger but there's something in there I can't quite make out.

"I told you. Don't touch things that are yours" She scolded with a sharp tone in her voice.

I raised to my feet and I looked down at Catra shamefully, "You have 3 seconds to show me what the fuck you are hiding from me"

"What are you? My, mom?" Catra laughed dryly, trying to crack a joke.

I huffed and tried to grab the papers, "You think this is a joke?!"

"Of course not!" She rambled, continuing to hold the papers back up to her chest. The papers that were scattered in front of me were now safely enclosed in Catra's arms.

What the hell was she hiding from me?

Remembering the previous conversation about how the way Catra's movements, and the way her pupils dilated or how her breathing stopped a bit when I mentioned if the papers were about...Shadow Weaver.

I dropped my hands at my side, the air feeling thin as I sniffled.

"If it's about Shadow Weaver, then just cough it up and show me" I pleaded, definitely forcing a cough to hide any more cracks that formed into my sentences.

I noticed her same stifled behaviors as earlier, and at this point. We were playing connect the dots, I took this stillness in Catra as a chance to snatch the papers.

And finally, after what felt like ages I got the papers within my grasp. I looked at Catra who had the most distraught look of fear in her eyes..and face. My fingertips were numb..probably from the freezing air around us.

Those freezing fingertips slid under the vanilla folder to reveal what Catra had been hiding from me, but sudden sobs made me look up it. My heart wrenched and made me want to throw it out the window when my tired eyes watched a waterfall of despairing tears fall down her face. Sobs..sobs that I've almost never heard before. I instantly dropped the folder, forgetting the contents inside it that I was yearning to look at.

"Catra...Catra, calm down" My voice trying to break the void of gloominess with a more comforting tone.

Her body was wrapped in a small ball, her arms around her legs. Her hands were clasped together, her fingers turning white from how hard she'd been squeezing them. They were just as cold as mine were when I touched them.

It almost felt like an eternity when I heard small mumbles of repeating sentences. I couldn't make out what she was saying,

When I finally heard something, it really did break me.

"Please don't hate me"

"Please..don't hate me"

"Please don't hate me"

"Please don't hate me"

The chants came out strong and melancholy but slowly turned into soft sorrowful whispers that made my heart pound no matter what volume of the pleads. I softly took her hands in mine, trying to warm them up.

"Catra, I don't know what..I- I don't know what you're talking about, but can you please just help me by letting me see what is in the folder," I said. I hoped that my voice hadn't come out in a way of pressure but a way that I could help understand why she is acting this way.

No luck.

After an hour of trying to get an answer out of Catra, we sat in the dark hollow room. The silence was loud, but the loudest thing was the beat of our hearts. It seemed like it was bouncing off of the walls. Making us...Well, my ears begin to ring and pound.

I eventually decided enough was enough if Catra wasn't going to say anything. I had to look for myself, I reached for the file. I did notice the tenseness and the same change in her breathing as earlier but this time she made no attempt to try and reach for it back.

I slowly slid my thumb under the folder to see what was causing Catra to go so..haywire. The file was open and the first thing I saw was a crumpled up piece of paper that held information of our birth and I assumed was adoption papers? I flipped it to see nothing on the other side, sighing I placed it on the floor.

The next thing was a book that didn't have any title or any reference of what it was on the front or back. It was olive green and the texture of it was rough, it seemed like it had been through hell. My fingertips ran over the odd texture as my thumb pushed open but stopping when I saw a bunch of booked mark pages. Starting with the first one...

Entry #1:

Adora and Catra just arrived at my house, this is such a nuisance. I should have just been thrown into jail for 1 year.

My head tilted in confusion as I read over the sentence, "Hey is this yours?"

No response.

I shook her body but it seemed like Catra was just..out of it. I bit my lip and wanted to just forget whatever I was looking at but...curiosity took over me.

This couldn't have been Catra's, and what about being in jail? I clicked my tongue with a shake of my head, my finger finding the next bookmarked page. Interestingly, it was the next page.

Entry #2:

Adora is a very good child, can't say the same for Catra. She tore up the couch, even though she is of the human species, she acts like a feline.

More confusion washed over me, as my eyes wandered over the rough paper. The writing was diligent and seemed like it would be in some type of medieval scroll. But the writing itself..the meaning. It still wouldn't come to me, why...does Catra have some weird book about us?

Another bookmark I flipped to.

Entry #64:

Adora and Catra seemed to have gotten close, I don't enjoy it. I should try and separate them, I don't want Adora to get attached to Catra that much.

My heart began to race as more and more information slurred through my mind. It was giving me a headache from not being able to pinpoint what I was reading. Who was writing this stuff? Was there some stalker I didn't know about?

Fear almost took over my body as I realized there was only 2 more bookmarked papers, just what are those last 2 about? There are so many other pages to explore..but only a few were actually marked.

Entry #92

I found Adora and Catra sleeping together, somewhat closer. It seems they have formed an even stronger connection when I told Adora that Catra is not a good person. Catra's also been called to the principal's office for slapping a girl. Adora took the blame for it when it wasn't her fault.

I held my breath longer than I thought I was, realizing that when I finally exhaled I was gasping for a few breaths. "Who is this..sick fuck" I whispered, flipping through random pages at this point. My hands were erratically trying to find the final page. A lightbulb was starting to ignite in my mind. It can't be.

Entry #1184 (Final Entry)

Adora and Catra are entering different middle schools, I am finally able to leave from them. I have done all my community service, I do have to continue to provide money for them. Mostly for Adora though.

That connected the final dots of who this mystery person is. The book..this journal of my life and Catra's belonged to Shadow Weaver. But..why? Why would Catra have this..valuable information and why wouldn't she share it with me.

I wanted to scream at Catra, but I remembered what position she was in. I couldn't do that to her, I don't have the heart.

Instead, I proceeded with what information was left in the file. My eyebrow raised when I picked up a few unpaid bills that were years overdue that had the name of Shadow Weaver written on them. Those didn't concern me as much, but my hands dug further through the folder to find even more tax records, speeding tickets, and something that really caught my eye. There was a sticky note that was written in...Catra's writing.

It wrote, 'Court cases and Crime records'

My eye's widened a bit if Shadow Weaver's journal was in here. Then..that must mean that everything in here was about her. The first thing I pulled out was a mug shot. A mug shot of the women who took care of Catra and I. She looked terrible, worn out, and completely unrecognizable. I idolized her when I was younger, I saw her..as a mother.

As more curiosity filled my body, I came to the conclusion that there had to be something in here about my parents. I almost..felt happy that Catra found these papers. I pulled out another paper that held a crime record sheet.

Record #445921

Station: Department of Brightmoon

Name: Shadow Weaver

Age: 48

Crime Record:

- Murder (Date of Crime: 8-15-06) - See details from Shaunt Regio.

Attorney: ??

- Stealing (Date of Crime: 5-1-06) - Caught stealing liquor at a nearby gas station.

Attorney: ??

- Drug/Alcohol abuse (Date: ??) - Police came by for a search of her apartment, found several bags of marijuana, and many beer bottles scattered around.

Attorney: ??

- Abused animals (Date: ??) - Caught on from security footage of kicking many animals.

Attorney: ??

Extra notes:

- Always bribed the judge

- Never sent to jail; always paying for bail.

- Had to do community service by taking in two children until they were 18, paying for basic needs, and necessities.

- The attorney was always kept a secret?

- Has ties with Shaunt Regio

My trembling hands struggled to hold the paper that was in my grasp, my eyes darted around the room a bit.

"What..the fuck" I muttered to myself, as I threw it onto the carpet in complete shame. All these crime records..all these cases that I never even knew about Shadow Weaver. The word, 'murder' made me sick to my stomach. But knowing that I had to continue to find something about my parents made me even sicker. It felt weird...I felt nasty that I was looking through something like this.

The last thing that was in the folder, besides other random taxes was.. an old ripped up documentary. Though it looked like Catra had written on it. Not much was written on it, just a circle of a particular huge paragraph. There was another photo of a mugshot which..had Shadow Weaver's face on it. My hands were trembling once again, and my palms felt like an ocean of sweat.

I mustered up the courage and began to read.

"As of August 15, 2006. Shadow Marie Weaver committed a crime, along with a man named 'Shaunt Regio'. They were both sentenced 20 years in person, for the murder of Aaron and Amy Bucceri. The family had 2 kids, a female named 'Adora' and a male named 'Adam'. At the time of Aaron and Amy were killed, Adam was only 6, while Adora was only a couple months old. Shadow Weaver had a history of paying bail, which she decided to use this time as well. She was sentenced to 250,00 bail or 20 years in prison. The judge allowed the compromise but decided it wasn't enough. Mrs. Weaver had to pay 250,00 bail. But as well do another deal, '1 year in jail or foster in Adora and another infant named 'Catra'. There is not much information on Catra, but we know that she was found in a box, looking like a feline cat. She was instantly put into the adoption center. Shadow Weaver had no choice but to choose the option of fostering the kids until they were 18."

[End of session]

Time stopped at that moment, everything felt like it was frozen to me. I couldn't feel anything around me, I couldn't comprehend what I just read. My eyes were glued to the paper, they didn't wander anywhere. They wouldn't even blink as I just reread the passage over and over.

Over and over again.

I could tell I was hyperventilating at that moment, "Catra.."

"Catra" I whimpered.

A sudden warmth wrapped around my body, even if I couldn't feel, see, or hear at that moment. The only thing that broke through that was Catra.

"I'm sorry" Her whimpers filled the room as well.

Our two bodies were clumped together in a heap of emptiness and sadness. My hands fought to hold the back of Catra's shirt.

"My...parents" I gasped, finally taking Catra's shirt and gripping it tighter than I ever thought I could. Through the blurriness of my tears, I saw a few veins popping out of my hand from the tightness of my grip.

"I'm sorry"

~~~~~~~~~~~~

Nothing was the same after that. A hollow hole in my stomach that would never fill. A..feeling of betrayal filled my heart as I stared at Catra who was staring back at me.

I broke the silence that was taking over the room for hours, "How long have you known"

"What?" She mumbled, just as weak as I was.

"You know what I'm talking about"

Catra sighed and ran a hand through her messy hair, "I've..I've only known for a bit"

"Catra..don't lie to me" I pressed, tapping my fingers along the vanilla folder.

"I'm not lying to you," She said with honest sincerity. It was a bit too honest to the point where I felt bad I asked her again.

I gripped the table at that moment, "It doesn't matter, why would you keep this from me?"

A lump in both of our throats formed at that moment, but Catra's was the first to be swallowed. Mine kept as I awaited her answer.

Nothing came out.

I slammed my fist on the table, "Goddamnit Catra, answer me. You had no right to keep it from me"

Tears formed at the rim of her eyes as she fought hard to not let them escape from her eyes. Only a shrug was given as an answer.

Unfortunately, that enlarged the fire that was beginning to go out, but that vague answer on such an important thing to me. It hurt.

"You...I thought we were over these fucking secrets. This is why you've been ignoring my calls huh? You've been sneaking around and doing this shit behind my back. We were supposed to do this together. You said you wouldn't lie to me again!"

Catra bared her fangs, "Well maybe I kept it from you for you're own good!"

"Oh hoo, so hiding it would do me any better" I spat.

She then raised from her seat and stared at me with eyes I haven't seen since the first we reunited on the first day of school.

"You think it's easy for me to just tell you that 'Oh yeah, Adora. I'm sorry but you're parents are dead because of our old caretaker that happens to be our teacher!" She yelled but almost immediately covering up her mouth.

My eyes widened, "W-W...What are you talking about?"

Dead silence.

The dots were officially connected, "Oh great, so another thing you're hiding from me. I'm sure you've known that for a long time huh? Shadow Weaver has been Mrs. Grant this whole time hasn't she?"

Catra couldn't lie anymore, her head gave a stiff nod.

I let out a cough of disgust and swallowed thickly. My stomach made weird noises as I raced into her bathroom and allowed the contents of my stomach to escape into the toilet. The sickness went away after but the empty pit of my stomach caused sharp pains everywhere.

Tears were streaming down my face as I stood up and looked at Catra with utter pain. I coughed a few times before walking up to Catra, making us almost an inch apart.

"I'm your best friend...I'm..your lover. H-How could you lie to me about something like this? And..for how long you have been doing it for.. hurts me..so much, Catra" I confessed, allowing many cracks in my voice to appear.

Catra could no longer look me in the eyes as she stared down at the floor as if she was being scolded.

"I'm sorry" Was the only thing she was able to say.

I opened my mouth to say something..just something to make her give me more reasoning but I closed it. I walked over to my backpack and snatched it up, adjusting it onto my shoulders. I looked over at the files, considering to take it with me but it would only cause me more grief.

I snatched up a small yellow paper note and shoved it into my pocket.

I walked into the hallway that led to Catra's front door, stopping in front of it. My back was the only thing I allowed Catra to see.

"I can't...I don't" I struggled to find the words to say, tears still refusing to stop as I grabbed the knob of the door.

"Think about what you did"

I turned my head just a bit to where Catra could only see my side profile.

"Goodnight...Catra.."