"Eren?" I paused, already regretting letting Levi put me up to this, "are you in there?"

if he isn't there let's just walk away and pretend this never happened

i can tell levi that i tried

that's enough

"I'm going to leave if you don't respond-" I called out loudly, leaning up against the door to his room.

please don't respond

i'm begging you

just let me go...

"What do you want?" Eren shouted back, "I mean- come in."

wow- levi really did talk to you

"I don't think you've ever been that polite in your life," I entered the room, closing the door behind me. "You clearly haven't changed at all- it still smells like shit in here."

does he even shower ?????

"Fuck off."

"You shouldn't say things like that-"

"Or what?"

"Or I'll totally give up on trying to reason with you and the two of us will never talk again."

"So- only he can tell you to fuck off?"

"He can't tell me to do anything- he just ignores what I tell him and does whatever he wants-"

"Whatever."

"He told me to go talk to you so really you should be thankful," I scoffed, "what's wrong with you?"

"What's wrong with you?"

"Oh I don't know- a traumatic fall that led to me switching bodies?"

what do you want from me?

"Listen- I thought you were supposed to be my friend? Why do you have to attack me? Did something happen?" I frowned at him- watching as Eren avoided my gaze.

"He's an asshole."

"I know."

"Don't let someone be a dick to you because you find them attractive?"

"I wasn't planning on it," I hesitated- "did you think I was going to let him push me around? I'm not stupid- and besides that would be totally embarrassing- can you imagine it? Me- following Levi Ackerman? It should be the other way around."

"You seemed awfully friendly," he looked up at me, rolling his eyes, "watch out."

"Did you seriously scream at me and make me feel like shit because you were worried about me? You're insane," I stifled my laughter, staring at Eren and his messy ass room in disbelief. "You're so stupid."

"We talked it out didn't we? Cut me some slack."

"Whatever," it was my turn to roll my eyes at him, "you know it's kinda embarrassing?"

"What is?" He relaxed, laying down in the bed.

"That we got into a huge fight in front of Levi- and that the only reason we made up so quickly is because he talked to me."

"He talked to me too," Eren muttered under his breath, "that ass-"

"I know that one of the issues we were dealing with was being nicer to him but-"

"He sucks."

"HE'S TOTALLY GOING TO HOLD THIS OVER ME."

"Let me at him," Eren grinned.

oh no offense but-

"Eren- look at this body- do you really think you could beat it in a fight?" I got closer to him- flexing. "I didn't want to admit it but Levi is surprisingly strong for someone who spends most of his time locked in a sunless office."

it's a bit frightening

"Is he," Eren trailed off, "you know?"

"Are you asking about his dick?"

"EW NO."

"Oh," I paused, "well I can tell you about it if you'd like, you know I actually have a surprising amount of self control-"

"Please stop speaking."

alright ):

"Does he have abs?"

"Is that seriously what you were asking about? That's so boring," I grumbled, lifting up my shirt to show Eren Levi's abs. "Yeah, he does- you can touch if you want."

honestly levi is attractive- it's a shame his personality is so... demented

"It would be much cooler if he wasn't so- Levi," I sighed, "are you done? Don't you have muscles of your own to feel up?"

"You offered," Eren shrugged. "This is really weird."

"You're telling me."

"So how are you going to get back?"

well-

"That's why Levi and I are here- we're looking for documents."

"Good luck," Eren muttered, "your father must have said something- Mikasa has been having us patrol like crazy."

"Who said I was doing anything illegal?"

"I'm just saying, I can't help you with it, I'm already going to get chewed out for arguing with you."

"Which you totally deserve."

"Can't you talk her out of it?"

"Can't you help me?"

"No."

"Ok then- no I can't."

"You suck."

"Don't tell her."

"I'm not a snitch."

"Are you sure? I can remember more than a few times where our plans were totally ruined because you ran and told my tutor everything."

eren is untrustworthy-

"I'm not a kid anymore Y/N."

"And I'm not a L/N."

"Technically you're in Levi's body so, yeah you aren't."

actually- that brings up an interesting point

"And yet that suit of armor in my father's office didn't seem to notice."

"That thing scares me."

"That's because you got beat up by it."

"Because you're cruel."

"And you're a knight- shouldn't you be able to fight an object?"

"Leave my room."

"No snitching?"

"No snitching."

"Great! I'll try and change Mikasa's mind but- no promises."

i really don't think i can do anything

"Thanks," Eren grumbled, looking up at me as I turned to leave. "Tell him thanks."

oh?

"Really?"

"Yeah."

"You've changed."

"Are you trying to fight again."

"Sorry sorry- just what did he talk to you about?"

"None of your business."

"Jeez ok-"

"Sorry."

"No need," I smiled back at him. "I'll tell him you said thank you- but you should really pick up your room- it stinks."

"GET OUT."

ok-

I retraced my steps, taking my time to return to my room where I assumed Levi was still waiting.

i really don't want to give him more to gloat about than i need to

"Levi-"

"Killing me would be problematic so don't think about it," he quickly cut me off.

"What the hell are you talking about?"

"'I'll kill you if this blows up in my face,'" Levi quoted me from earlier, "you look happy so-"

"Oh- no, it went well Eren says thank you- hold on-" I whirled around to face him, "YOU THOUGHT IT WAS GOING TO GO HORRIBLY AND STILL SENT ME THERE? WHAT KIND OF FRIEND ARE YOU?"

"Friend?" Levi gaped at me.

"Forget it."

"Say it again."

"That you're a total asshole for sending me into a conversation that you thought was going to go like shit and make me feel miserable?"

"You're doing this on purpose."

"I don't like repeating embarrassing things."

"Friends?"

"And what of it?"

"An hour ago you were calling me your enemy."

"Well, so were you."

"Because you are dumbass."

"I'm not going to repeat myself because that's stupid- you can either drop this now and forget it ever happened or say something along the lines of 'yes y/n! i would describe us as friends! at least for now while it's still mutually beneficial for us to get along!'"

"I am not saying that shit."

"So we're dropping this, good."

"We can do it."

"Huh?"

"Friends."

"Wow."

"-for now."

"That's much better."

"That felt so fucking unnatural."

"Let's keep this entire conversation a secret- in fact let's keep our entire friendship a secret-"

"It would kill both of our reputations," Levi nodded, "this dies with us."

"Deal."

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they r the only ppl who would have a public romantic relationship (fake) but not want a single soul to know that they see each other as friends

- ami