I wake with the scent of pine and blood and sunshine nearly suffocating me. My body aches like I've been shattered and stitched back together. Every joint throbs. My mouth tastes of earth and copper.

I'm naked. Curled in the dirt. Wrapped around something warm.

Beau.

He's asleep beside me, his chest rising and falling in a slow cadence. The blood at his side is crusted and brown, healing. One of his hands is tangled in my hair.

For a moment, I just lie there and breathe. I must have drifted off some time before the dawn, as I watched the stars fade into the sky. As I listened to the quiet forest around us. Dawn creeps across the horizon, the moon long set. Mist hangs in the pine boughs like threadbare gauze, catching the pale light that spills through the canopy above.

Beau groans softly, lashes fluttering. Then blinks awake.

"Hey," he rasps. His eyes are no longer pale. No longer haunted. A thunderstorm with golden lightening. "You're okay."

"You're not," I whisper. My voice is too hoarse to manage much more, like I've forgotten how to use human vocal cord. "Beau—"

"I've been worse." He winces, but reaches for my face. His fingers trail along my jaw, his expression more awe than pain. "You shifted."

I nod, still stunned by the truth of it. "I think I needed your bond mark," I say slowly, remember how it burned under the light of the full moon. I reach inside to feel for my wolf. She's happily curled up in my chest. I try to reach inside, to see if she can take control again, but she and I have come to the same conclusion. "And the full moon. I don't think I can shift without it."

Beau doesn't seem upset by the fact. He keeps looking at me like I've done something impossible. Like I've offered him the moon itself.

"My wolf knew you would shift," he murmurs. "Every time I worried that you were at risk, he butted against me." Beau laughs weakly. "Not that you needed to shift. You were so clever, Rhea. Masking your scent like that? Creating false trails? If I wasn't following the bond, I would have been running in circles."

He pauses, exhaling. "I could barely feel you. I thought I was going to be too late."

I swallow, my hand curling over his.

"You weren't."

Beau's eyes flash with angry gold. "I should have seen it sooner," he says quietly. "Nora. She was on cooking duty. She dosed the whole pack with wolfsbane, blamed Lila. At first, I didn't suspect Nora, since she was dosed too. Lila was the only one unaffected.

"But when the Denali pack showed up, everything became clear. It was never the Lunar Pack hunting Lila. They came for her. Not to hurt her, but their new alpha, Noah—he's claiming that they're fated. None of us could shift to stop them. We couldn't even defend her."

My stomach twists. "She went with them?"

Beau's jaw clenches. "She didn't have a choice," he murmurs. "Even with the full moon, Lila's wolf has always been shy, weak."

I remember the pained look in her honey-brown eyes when she spoke of fated mates, when she described rejected bonds. "Lila implied that her mate rejected her," I say softly. "Can a rejection be undone?"

Beau shakes his head. "Severing the bond is final, but the Denali alpha was firm in his conviction. I thought it was going to come to a slaughter, but Lila said she'd go peacefully. As long as they promised to leave without bloodshed."

"Did they?" I ask, barely breathing. I think of hot-headed Owen, of the younger wolves eager to prove themselves with or without fangs.

Beau nods. "They did. The Denali alpha, he's not cruel, I don't think. Their scouting missions were never intended to lead to violence, their only goal was Lila. I should have realized it when they tried to separate her from the pack that day. That they were always testing the boundaries closest to the gardens."

His voice tightens. "And then I realized that the black wolf wasn't a part of the Denali pack. That you were still in danger. Nora had asked to borrow my phone... the pieces came together."

"She thinks I make you weak," I say gently. "She wanted to protect you from me."

A growl rumbles from Beau's chest. "She's wrong," he says firmly. "You don't weaken me. I think our bond was the only reason I was able to shift at all."

I blink at him, not convinced.

"Everyone got a dose of wolfsbane," he says, lifting his gaze to mine, fierce despite the clear weariness in his limbs. "But I think I got more. Nora had to made sure I couldn't shift. She had to make sure to nearly poison me with it." He laughs darkly. "She almost did. Because that's what wolfsbane does, Rhea, it kills your wolf. Turns us human if we survive it."

The irony isn't lost on me. Nora and Kade both claiming that it was hidden wolves, me, smothering wolfish instinct.

"But even with my wolf muted, I could still feel the bond. I could hear you, feel you. It kept my wolf from succumbing. With you tethering him, he never gave up. Not once."

My breath catches a little as my wolf purrs with happiness. This is a ridiculous, surreal conversation to have naked in the middle of the forest after having a werewolf battle, but it feels perfect.

"You challenge me, Rhea. I need that. But you also... soothe me. You make me happy." His fingers tighten around mine. "You make me happy."

"You make me happy too," I whisper, my heart warm and full. And still realistic. "But we haven't really solved anything, Beau."

The fire in Beau's eyes does dim, but it shifts. Softens. As if looking at me calms some wild part of him. He reaches for me again, pulling me onto his chest.

"I don't want to go back to how things were before."

I listen to the steady beat of his heart. "What do you mean?"

"I mean the distance." His jaw tightens. "I've been trying to split myself in two ever since I met you: the alpha the pack needs, and the man you might be able to love. And it wasn't until you left that I saw all my mistakes. You didn't need half of me, Rhea. The pack doesn't need half of me."

"You were trying to protect them," I say, lifting my head, sitting up. My hair, tangled and muddy, hangs down my chest.

"I was trying to control everything," he says. "Because I thought that's what made me a good alpha. The pack doesn't need a king on the mountain. They need someone who's willing to change. To grow."

He exhales slowly, pushing himself to his elbow. "And I need I you to do that."

There's a misty pause where the only sounds are the first calls of birdsong.

"I'll give up the alpha role. If that's what it takes," he whispers solemnly. "The pack can decide who they want to lead them. I'll walk away from the mountains, if that's what you want. We can live in your terrible apartment, or go to Chicago or anywhere else you want to go." He smiles a little crookedly. "I don't think anyone will let me into engineering school at this point, though."

I let out a shaky breath. "Beau—"

"I'm not done." His hand finds my knee. "You don't have to choose between your life and mine. I want to build something new with you. Not out of obligation or instinct or a fated bond." His voice drops to something warm and rough. "But because I love you, Rhea. And I'll do whatever it takes to be yours. If that means walking away from the pack, fine. If it means figuring out how to combine our lives, I'll do it. But this—" He presses his forehead to mine, takes my hands into his. "This is what I want. You. Just you. For as long as you'll have me."

Tears sting my eyes. My voice fails me.

Because I want that too.

I want him. All of him. Not just the sexy forest ranger, but the man who found that missing piece of me and dragged her back to the surface. The alpha who cares so much for his family, for his pack. All of him.

My hands tremble as I reach up, curling around the back of his mud-streaked neck. He leans into me with a soft sigh, eyes closing like he's grounding himself in my touch.

"You really want all of it?" I murmur. "My bad moods. The court dates. The city noise. Me delirious and cranky with sleep deprivation with case files scattered across the floor?"

His eyes flick open, bright and molten gold, shining with affection. "I want all of it."

He leans in to kiss me, but I stop him.

"There's just one problem," I say.

"What's that?"

"I'm still a wolf."

His expression softens with surprise, then eases into an easy smile. "Yeah. You are."

I push him gently to his back, crawling over until I'm straddling his hips. His breath catches a little as his hands sink to my waist. I study him—the crust of blood on his him, the exhaustion in his face, the stubborn line of his jaw. There's something in his eyes that I haven't noticed before. Something like a fragile and flickering hope.

"And I'm pretty sure wolves live in the forest," I say. My sleepy wolf is radiating a sense of certainty and warmth and happiness I don't think I could ignore if I tried. "And I want you to stay alpha, if that's what you want. I love the way you lead, Beau. The way you care about your pack. I love your strength, and your gentleness. And I love your secret sense of humor."

Beau's fingers tighten against my skin, like he's afraid to speak. As if it would change my mind.

"I'll figure out how to commute to law school from your cabin," I add. "Someone has to make sure your coffee's being made right." A beat passes. I lean down to kiss his the corner of his mouth. "We'll make it work. Because I love you."

Beau stares at me like I'm the dawn.

Then he exhales, trembling, and closes his eyes as if he's finally let himself believe it.

"I love you too," he whispers. "I think I've been falling for you since the moment I saw you. Since you told me off in front of that town hall."

"I had good material," I murmur.

He laughs. I lean in.

I press my mouth to the soft place between his neck and shoulder and graze it with my teeth. I bite, but not hard. Not enough to draw blood, but just to leave the faintest mark. A promise. I kiss the spot. And echo of what will come the next full moon.

Beau goes very still beneath me. A quiet, reverent groan rumbles from his chest.

When I pull back, his eyes are pure gold. "That's a dangerous tease, counselor."

"Objection," I say. "That was a promise."

There's still so much we haven't figured out. The pack. Law school. Crestline. What happens when the next crises hits and we don't agree. But for now, the bond between us hums warm and steady. My wolf presses gently against my chest. Quiet, content. A part of me now, not a threat or an instinct or a stranger. Just me.

I collapse beside him, tangled in his limbs, and for a long time we just lie there. Naked and bruised. The forest begins to stir with the rising sun. Mist catches bright and golden through the trees. Wildflowers stretch and look to the sun. Like some sort of magical, secret world.

And I—

I'm not supposed to be here.

Curled in the dirt with a naked alpha under me, my body aching from battle and rebirth, the taste of blood and earth on my tongue. I'm not supposed to be in love with a wolf. I'm not supposed to have one of my own.

But here I am.

And I've never felt more like myself.