"i want to kiss you... right here and now."

joohyun stands there, eyes wide, mouth opened.

her hand pinches the fabric of her shirt as her mind keeps replaying the words she just heard.

seulgi wants to kiss her.

she unconsciously bites her lower lip.

seulgi wants to kiss her... too?

she's had that urge since the first time she invited seulgi over. she didn't make a move or showed any motive because... well... it isn't right. and even if seulgi keeps telling her how beautiful she is, joohyun can feel how her soulmate has been trying to be careful around her all this time.

well, not until tonight.

she realizes it just now; that seulgi's resentment towards seungwan isn't just because they were together before, but because seulgi's still jealous of her ex-girlfriend.

she wouldn't blame seulgi for feeling that. she knows exactly how it feels. she's had her share of jealousy towards eunae that she keeps to herself.

admitting it out loud would mean trouble anyway.

but with seulgi standing there, voicing her feelings out, how is joohyun supposed to respond to that? because after those words left seulgi's mouth, joohyun knows they've already crossed that line that they have been tiptoeing around for months now.

"seulgi..." joohyun exhales, not sure what to say.

seulgi takes in a deep breath and looks away. "look. i'm sorry. i shouldn't have said that. i'll... i'll just leave."

"no..." joohyun calls when seulgi turns away. her feet move to follow the woman, her hand grabbing seulgi by her coat. "please stay..."

seulgi turns to her, and joohyun's heartbeat rises.

"i... i missed you," joohyun whispers, looking down. "two weeks, seul. i haven't seen you for two weeks. please don't go."

seulgi steps closer, gently placing a hand on joohyun's waist. "hey. i'm here. i missed you too."

as if out of instinct, joohyun wraps her arms around seulgi's neck and pulls the taller closer.

and boy did it feel right; like they were supposed to be like that in the first place.

"stay..." she cups seulgi's cheek. "stay here tonight."

seulgi nods. she leans in and kisses joohyun's forehead, down to the tip of her nose, and finally pressing their lips together.

joohyun feels like everything in her life suddenly made sense as soon as their lips touched, like every thought and question that wandered through her mind suddenly had answers.

and for someone like her who's always been an achiever, this is the first time she felt contented, secured.

it amazes her how they seem to perfectly fit each other, like pieces of puzzle combined to make one.

as their kisses become harder, seulgi walks her backwards to the counter, lifting her onto the marble surface and proceeding to kiss her jawline down to her neck.

joohyun wraps her legs around her soulmate's hips. "seulgi..." she clutches the other woman's hair, who keeps peppering her neck with kisses.

seulgi hums.

"let's..." her breath hitches when seulgi's hands went under her shirt.

"mmm?"

"bedroom..." joohyun says.

seulgi pulls back to catch some breath, both hands resting on joohyun's side.

"bedroom?" seulgi asks.

joohyun nods. "it's much comfier there than here." she taps the counter.

seulgi chuckles. "right." she steps back, and joohyun misses her warmth immediately.

seulgi takes her coat off and drops it on the floor before pressing herself back against joohyun.

"as you wish."

---

this isn't right.

joohyun tells herself that as her back hits the soft mattress and seulgi's body hovers on top of her.

this isn't just right. seulgi shouldn't be here in her apartment doing... this.

but pondering over what's right or wrong becomes pointless when joohyun looks up at the person above her, asking herself how can seulgi be that perfect.

joohyun's hand reaches for her soulmate's nape to pull her closer for another kiss.

rationality kicks in once again, and joohyun finds herself questioning the paradoxical situation they are in now: how can something feel so wrong yet so good at the same time?

seulgi pulls away from her, her fingers lifting the hem of joohyun's blouse. joohyun raises her arms as seulgi takes it off her. she discards the blouse somewhere on the floor while staring at joohyun's half-nakedness.

"you're so beautiful," she breathes. she kisses joohyun again on the lips, down to her chin, and then her neck as she unhooks the bra.

joohyun closes her eyes as thoughts come passing again.

in her thirty-two years of life, she never imagined herself doing something like this.

doing something people may regard as utterly horrendous.

she's always been obedient, law-abiding, the role model, the smart one. she's sure no one from her closest peers would ever imagine she'd be doing this--spending the night with a married person.

the thoughts got pushed at the back of her head when she bites her lower lip as seulgi gently kisses her now exposed chest.

"ohh..." joohyun presses her lips together, suppressing a moan from coming out.

"don't hold yourself back. relax." seulgi smiles warmly at her. she intertwines their hands and pins them above joohyun's head. "you're so beautiful, do you know that?"

joohyun's face feels warm; she had to break the gaze.

"tell me, do you really want to do this?" seulgi asks.

joohyun knit her brows. how come seulgi's still asking her that when they're on her bed and she's already half-naked?

"don't get me wrong. i want you. i really want you," seulgi says, tracing her fingers on joohyun's collarbone.

"then why... are you still... asking me that?" joohyun's breath hitches at the touch.

"i want to make sure you want this." seulgi plants a kiss in the valley between joohyun's breasts. "i want to hear you want this."

"i-- oh..." joohyun stops when the pair of lips travel down her abdomen.

"tell me, joohyun, while i can still control myself."

joohyun looks down and sees seulgi resting her chin on her stomach. joohyun's too drowned in her emotions she's willing to throw everything away to make sure this happens tonight.

she wants to feel seulgi.

feel seulgi's skin over hers.

feel seulgi inside her.

and who is she to detest what the spirits want?

"i..." joohyun takes a deep breath. "i want this... i want you..."

seulgi smiles and proceeds to leaving gentle kisses on joohyun's skin as she unbuttons the jeans and pulls it down.

"uh..." joohyun lifts her hips as seulgi pulls the last piece of her undergarment down her legs.

joohyun felt the hot breath on her skin when seulgi positions herself in between her legs.

"shit..." joohyun shuts her eyes close as her impatient hand pulls seulgi's head down.

she throws her head back when seulgi finally dives into her. joohyun shuts her eyes and grasps the sheets as a great deal of pleasure takes over her whole body and soul.

her subsequent moans of seulgi's name echo off the walls of her room.

seungwan's theory was right. sex with someone's soulmate is ten times better than others.