"Erica," Dad says. "You're awake."

"What happened?" I say. I thought after life, heaven, would look different. I didn't think that Dad would be here.

"You jumped off a roof, you're lucky that Tyler kid was there to call an ambulance." He sighs. "You did break your leg and arm and a few ribs, but they should be better soon.

I didn't die. I didn't die. I didn't die. "I didn't die," I finally say.

"No, you didn't," Dad says.

"I wanted to die," I look around the room. "Where's Tyler?"

Tyler appears out of the corner.

"I'll give you two some time alone," Dad says.

Dad leaves the room.

"What's wrong with you?" I say to Tyler.

"I saved your life, wouldn't you at least thank me for that?" He says.

"No, no I wouldn't. I finally found a way to escape and you ruined that by calling an ambulance you stalker."

"I didn't want to see you die."

"No, I wanted to die, you should've respected my wishes." I sigh. Shake my head. "I don't understand."

"Don't understand what?"

"I don't understand why I'm still here today," I take a deep breath and let all my anger and frustration out. "I don't get it. I wanted to die. I wanted to not be in so much pain anymore. No more humiliation. No more nothing. I guess you wouldn't know what that's like, since you have such a perfect life." 

"Leave me alone now," I say. 

He stares at me for a second, then leaves the room. 

. . . .

Dad gave me my notebook so I could write. It appears that I didn't die. I wanted so badly to leave forever and never come back. I'll get into that later I guess. The nurses and doctors say that I need more sleep, but I can't sleep. I was out for like 3 days or something like that. That new kid who's way out of my league, Tyler saved me. I'm pretty annoyed at him.

. . . .

Zoel and Mom came to visit me today. Zoel doesn't understand really how I got into the hospital. Mom and Dad are fighting again. Mom says that it's all Dads fault for letting me leave at 3:00 in the morning to jump off a roof. I pretended to be sleeping, but I could hear their whole conversation. I swear if they didn't get a divorce Mom would kill Dad in his sleep. 

. . . .

"My leg hurts!" I complain to the nurse. Dad went to do something for work, and Mom took Zoel to get some dinner before going home. 

I can't tell if it's day or night or how long I've been here. It's really confusing. I think I've been here for a year. Probably not, but it feels like a long time. They won't let me read because they're afraid that I'll somehow kill myself from that. Not sure how but you know.

"How long have I been here?" I say.

"2 months." The overly cheerful nurse says.

2 months. 2 months. 2 months. I missed Christmas. I missed the new year.

"My leg hurts!" I lie. My leg is the only broken thing in my body now.

She gives me some pain killers. Turns around after setting the bottle on the table next to my bed. I lean over and grab it pouring a handful into my hand. She turns around right when I'm putting them in my mouth.

"I need backup!" She yells.

A bunch of other people come into my room. I've already swallowed my pills right when the song Sing by My Chemical Romance comes on. Black surrounds my eyes. I can't see anymore. I think I've found a way to escape.