*unedited, not proof read.*

A week had passed all in a blur since Meher knew the truth behind her marriage, since they found out about Hoor.

Arham had been a mess for the first three days, he hadn't left the hospital since they had entered the building, slowly, very slowly he had come to accept Hooriya's condition. Meher would often stay at night with Hooriya and Arham.

She spent her mornings locked in the room at the Butt mansion, sometimes talking to Nadia and Waris, sometimes helping their mother in the kitchen, she found peace among these strangers.

Hooriya's condition had started to deteriorate, it was just yesterday night that her heart had stopped beating, luckily Alia had been in the room with Meher then and had helped resurrect Hoor.

All of them knew the end was close, closer than they had anticipated. Hooriya spend her days in lucidity, the amped up dose of morphine was helping her breath despite the excruciating pain.

The unpredictable weather of Islamabad had a thunderstorm in store for them today, Meher sat curled up on the sofa with a shawl covering her, reading a book she had borrowed from Alia. Hooriya had been sedated for her to escape the pain and get some asleep, Arham had gone to drop Safa home and Yusuf had volunteered to work in the hospital for as long as he was in Islamabad.

The constant loud rhythmic beeping of the heart monitor somehow comforted Meher, assured her that Hooriya was still with her. As her eyes followed the words printed on the paper, she let out a small yawn. She was tried, extremely tired. Meher had lost count of the day or time since she had stepped out of Lahore, her life was a back and forth between the butt mansion and hospital but she wasn't complaining, she wanted to be here, do this for Hoor, she wanted her last days to be happy.

The loud sqeeking sound of the door made Meher look up from her book, Arham had entered the room, freshly showered wearing a white shirt and stone washed jeans.

Arham looked at hoor who was peacefully sleeping on the bed, he walked towards her and adjusted Hooriya's blanket covering her properly, he then bent down and placed a kiss on her forehead.

Meher looked at the scene in front of her and felt her heart pinch a little, she would lie if she would say that she didn't feel the pain watching Arham and Hooriya.

The sofa on the other side dipped, Arham had taken a seat beside Meher. Meher looked up from her book to meet his eyes.

"Hi." He said softly.

Meher looked at him for a second longer before replying.
"Do you need something ?"

"Yes. I need you to come with me."

"Huh ?"

"Come with me." he said getting up from the sofa and walked out of the room. Meher wrapped the shawl around her shoulder and hesitantly followed him.

She made sure to maintain a distance of a few steps between their bodies as she walked, walking down the flight of stairs they reached the ground floor and she followed him as he lead her towards the cafeteria.

Even at 1 in the morning the cafeteria was bustling with nurses and doctors and a few families of the patients. Arham stopped at a small table meant for two and motioned Meher to take a seat with his hand.

"I'll be back." He said and walked towards the counter.

Meher looked around to see so many people, some trying to fight their sleep with the caffeine and some passing time. She didn't know why Arham had brought her here, he hadn't spoken to her since the last 7 days and neither had she, she wasn't angry at him anymore, she wasn't, she had seen how much the man loved Hooriya, she knew he was in pain, she didn't want to add on to his problems, she did love him, she still did. Watching him with Hoor was difficult, it killed her a little everyday, those who said that wounds heal with time clearly needed to step in her shoes.

She wasn't jealous, no she wasn't. She was hurt, she couldn't explain it to her heart that her husband wasn't just her own, it still ached to see him dot over and fawn on another woman.

"Hey."

Arham had joined her again, interrupting her chain of thoughts. He placed a styrofoam cup in front of her and sat down across her with one in his hand.

"I got you some tea." he said. "It's pretty cold tonight and I know how susceptible you are to catching a cold. And Ammi said you haven't had dinner as well so, drink it."

Meher looked at him for a few seconds before wrapping her hands around the warm cup, enjoying the warmth radiating from it.

"I don't know what to say Meher, I wanted to talk to you before, but I couldn't find the words, driving back from home I kept mustering the courage to face you today." He said taking a sip of his coffee.

"Shayad sorry bolne ka bhi hakk Nahi hai mujhe ab, jaanta hu jo maine kiya hai voh muafi ke layak nahi hai par Meher please find it in your heart to forgive me." (I know my sorry won't do any justice, I know I don't deserve your forgiveness but ..)

"Aapne Hooriya baaji se mohabatt ki, aapne unsey nafrat karne ki bhi koshish ki, kya kar paaye ? Agar aapko ab tak meri mohabatt par yakeen nahi tha toh shayad ab ho, Mujhe apse koi gila shikwa nahi hai, na mai aap se nafrat kar paayi, apko mujhse muafi karne ki koi zarurat nahi Arham, beshak mujhe bohot gehri chot pohchi hai, thoda waqt lageyga usse ghav ko bharne me."

(You loved Hooriya, you even try to hate her, but could you? I loved you too Arham and I have no complaints, I cannot hate you. You don't have to apologise to me, I'm hurt and it's going to take a while to heal.)

"I do care for you Meher." Arham said sincerely.

"But you don't love me." Meher said her eyes pooling up with tears. "And again I am not complaining, I know you love Hooriya baaji too much to replace her with someone."

"Meher I'm sor-."

"Talaq chahti hu mai." She said gulping down the lump in her throat.
(I want you to divorce me.)

"Meher what are you saying ?"

"I want you to divorce me Arham." She repeated again. A blanket of silence enveloped the two, Arham looked dazed by Meher's demands and Meher fought hard to keep her tears at bay.

"Why ?"

"Why ? Are you really asking me that ? Keeping aside everything that's ever happened with me, forgetting everything of the past, do you think I should still be with you when I know you will never love me, never. Do you think I deserve this ?"

"Meher I -."

"Arham. No." Meher said placing her hand on his which were kept on the table. "You'll always be my family Arham, but I can't let you be my husband." She said as a tear slipped from her eyes. "I can't let that happen for my sake, I don't deserve this."

"You don't." Arham replied nodded his head, his eyes were wet too. "But can we wait ti..till Hoo..can we wai-."

"Yes." Meher replied understanding what he meant.

"I'm so sorry Meher, I wish I could love you, I am so sorry." Arham got up from his seat and pulled Meher up, holding her close to himself, he buried his head in the crook of her neck and and whispered his apologies.

Meher's heart clenched, maybe this was the last time she would get to hold him, the last time she could feel his warmth, she loved him, he was the first man she loved, she truly loved. Meher bunched his shirt in her hand and held him close to him, she could feel her ribs constrict, squeezing her chest painfully, her lungs burned in protest as she suppressed her cries of agony.

Letting go of your love was the most painful feeling in the world. It was as if a piece of her heart and soul was leaving her with Arham.

•••

"You should have told me." Alia said following Yusuf's line of vision to see Arham and Meher in each other's embrace.

"Told you what ?" Yusuf let out a sad chuckle. "That I was in love with a married woman, that too none other than my best friends wife."

"Second wife." Alia corrected him.

"What difference does that make Alia, she is his, he excepted her in the court of God, it's wrong, but I still can't help loving her."

"You don't choose who to love Yusuf. Wouldn't it be so convenient then if you could."

"Yes." Yusuf replied looking at her giving her a small smile.

"Did you tell her ? Does she know ?"

"She hasn't spoken to me in a week, the week will turn into a lifetime if I let her know." Yusuf said shaking his head.

"And she loves him."

AN: so when I started this book, I wanted Meher to be swept off her her feet by Yusuf, for her to have her happily ever after with the guy who rescues her, why wouldn't I, I too grew up reading fairly tales, but as i grew up with Meher I realised that dismissing Meher's love for Arham would be such an injustice to her.

Arham Hooriya ki mohabatt, mohabatt hai,
Yusuf ki mohabatt bhi mohabatt
Par Meher ki mohabatt galti ?

We don't choose who we love, we love sometimes in spite of our better judgement so why not love unapologetically ?

I am so glad that, I didn't label Meher's love as an infatuation despite wanting to do so earlier.

I love Arham and Meher honestly, they are such complex characters that even I as an author find difficult to understand them.

I hope you guys likes the chapter.
I'm take 3 days off for my mental peace and to study.

Might update if I decide to write
Let's reach a 350 again.
Till then
Stay safe
lots of love
xoxo