Part 10
The blurriness slowly cleared from Avian's flummoxed eyes. The moon wasn't in the sky like it was moments ago, but instead, it was replaced with the gleaming yellow ball, tearing away at the other tiny stars in the black night. The fatigue was starting to fade from his skinny body. Zoar promised him that they wouldn't travel that day until he was completely reenergized again, and Avian, instead on insisting that they keep moving like he would have, agreed to stay in one place for a while. He honestly wanted to spend more time with the Luxray.
Avian was beginning to recognize some of his surroundings from when his parents took him out for walks and berry-picking. He still knew that his home was still far away, yet he was aware that his time with Zoar might come to an end when they reach his cave.
Whatever happened, he knew.
Maybe he could ask Zoar to stay with him, he thought. But the child remembered that Zoar had a pack. It sounded miserable there, yet maybe he would want to return? They were the Pokemon who raised him from an egg. He had someone to go back to, unlike Avian who had no one to look after him anymore like his parents did. The forest was a big place full of predators, like that Tyranitar. Or Zoar's pack.
If they found him again, who knew what would happen to him? Zoar might not even be there to save him again. Avian wondered if it was for the best that Zoar left him at his cave.
But Zoar... How would he react? When he didn't see two parents waiting at the cave's entrance with open arms and tears of joy in their eyes? When he realize that all of the risks he had taken were fruitless? Avian couldn't even imagine; he had never seen Zoar angry before. He was always smiling at him, regardless of whether Avian messed up or completed a task. Even when dealing with predators, he kept his cool and swiftly attacked the enemy no matter what. Was it possible for him to be mad at all, he wondered?
Vivid memories clashed in his mind of the beady red and yellow eyes from that night, and they seemed to morph into Zoar's face for a second. With a shiver, the Riolu held back the scared tears and shook his head. He didn't sleep at all last night, leaving him even weaker than usual. Avian covered his face with his paw, trembling.
Zoar, who had been washing his fur of leftover dirt, caught his eye at the tear-filled Pokemon. His chest flooded with worry; he looked like he was thinking about something terrifying. Hastily, he padded over to his side. "Hey, kit... Is everything okay?" he asked nervously. Avian had to look away, embarrassed of himself.
"N-n..." he mumbled.
"What's wrong? Ave, look at me, what's wrong? Why are you crying?" he questioned, a bit more firmly this time. The child shut his eyes, turning his head to face him.
"I..." I can't say it...! "It's just... Before... With the rocks and everything," he lied. "That was really scary..." The Luxray let out a distressed huff, giving him a knowing look.
"I know you're not telling me everything," Zoar said, keeping his tender expression. "I feel like you've been wanting to tell me something for a while. You know you can tell me anything. I promise I'll listen, and I'll try to help you as best as I can."
Avian stayed silent. Zoar looked desperate, and he noticed that he looked somewhat hurt. Is that because of me? he pondered. Avian sometimes wondered how the Pokemon became so smart; how he could see right through him into his emotions. His father and mother tended to do it too... It was probably a grown-up thing.
But it didn't matter now.
That look he wore... It was so sincere. And so harmless. Maybe, he thought, it was right to think that Zoar could never be angry. Maybe, even if they were not pure, some Pokemon could still be truly good and kind. Everything that this Pokemon had put forth for Avian only showed these traits. When he told him about his goal, he understood. He knew exactly how he felt, and wanted to help, like he claimed.
Maybe now... Zoar could help him once more?
Warm droplets streamed from Avian's eyes.
"I... I'm sorry, Zoar...!" he whimpered. Zoar's eyes widened.
"Huh? 'Sorry'? Why?" he echoed.
"P-pl-please don't be mad at me, okay...?!" Avian managed to choke out. Zoar was still trying to process what the child was saying.
"Ave, how can I be mad at you?" he said. "Just talk to me."
Reassurance filled Avian, like it did before. He grabbed at his paws.
"My parents... They're not home..."
"What do you mean...?"
"B... Before... Before I met you, my... My parents were..." He gulped. "...We were attacked by a pack of Pokemon..." Zoar tensed coldly, completely silent. "I was too scared to do anything... But then my parents came." The devastated Riolu let the scene play back in his mind, hiccuping and gasping. "Th... They... My father was fighting off some of the P-Pokemon, and th-they jumped on him all at once...! My mother... She dived in to save him... Th-there was red... And then... Th-they...!" He couldn't go on. Avian let out the culminating sobs that were trying to conceal themselves under his shell. "They promised they'd be back for me, Zoar...! They promised!"
He could feel it. Zoar was probably starting to regret saving him. He's probably thinking of how he should have killed me...! This would've never happened, and he could be living back at his pack peacefully...!
There was a long pause. An awkward, yet very ominous instant that left a chill of anxiety in the air. It almost lasted forever...
...Until Zoar pulled the pup close to his body with his paw, startling him.
"Oh my Arceus... Ave..." he breathed. "I'm... I'm so sorry..."
...He's not...? Avian thought to himself. Zoar voice and expression was sorrowful along with him, perhaps even more so.
"I can see why you didn't want to speak to me about it..." he admitted. "It must be so hard for someone as young as you to witness that and... Just run. Live on their own... But you..." He darted his eyes to their corners. Avian leaned against him for comfort, which he received a gentle lick on his forehead for. His tongue felt warm and sandpapery, just like his parents when they washed him. It seemed to soothe him slightly, and his crying lessened. Zoar looked to be in deep thought. "A pack of Pokemon... Near the Barren Earthside...?" he pondered aloud. Avian could only watch the older Pokemon follow his train of thought.
Then, it clicked.
Zoar's once intellectual face immediately turned into a mortified one, filled with horror. His pupils dilated, and sweat formed on his fur as his body tensed in complete dread.
"N-no... It can't... The midnight patrol... They couldn't have stumbled out of the territory on purpose to...!" he whispered. Avian could sense the fear in his tone, and cocked his head frantically.
"What... What are you talking about, Zoar...?" he asked anxiously. Zoar slowly turned his head, not wanting to look at the Riolu's reaction when he spoke.
"...Ave... I... I think I know who attacked your parents that night..." he uttered.
"...It was my pack."
A shock ran through Avian's body, one he could barely handle. It was like the world had stopped turning.
He couldn't move. He couldn't think. He couldn't speak.
No wonder those eyes looked familiar...
They were just like Zoar's.
They were exactly like Zoar's.
"N...No..." Avian gasped. Zoar stared at him, absolutely ashamed.
"I'm... I'm so sorry, Ave...! I'm so sorry they did that to you...!" he panicked. Avian had never seen Zoar like this. He never saw him mad, yet this was another emotion he was incapable of imagining him feeling: Genuine terror. "I didn't think that they would wander so far from the boundaries to hunt! They were supposed to be patrolling! We were in desperate needs for food, but this wasn't necessary at all! They...!"
That was when guilty tears began to slip from his once sharp eyes, and the child's heart snapped in two. The pup flinched slightly.
Why didn't he feel scared?
Why wasn't he running away from the very species of Pokemon that was capable of murdering his parents?
The one so powerful and cruel as to force Pokemon from their homes, fleeing away from the danger that was them?
...But Zoar wasn't like that.
He wasn't like any of them. No, he was the absolute opposite. Zoar took care of him; he made him feel better when he was down. He inspired him and gave him a goal to go after!
And after all this... It was his pack that burdened him with this "blame."
It felt... Almost...
"I should have went with them!" Zoar groaned loudly. "I-I couldn't-! I didn't-! I--"
Avian used his two paws to hold Zoar's much larger head, carefully pulling it toward him to give him a gentle nuzzle. The Luxray was in shock.
"It's okay, Zoar." Avian said quietly. Zoar clenched his teeth in dismay.
"Ave... B-but... After what I...?"
"It's not your fault..." Avian assured, looking straight into his eyes. "Everything you did... Was to help me...! And it's thanks to you that I'm still here now." He smiled sadly, glancing away and removing his paws from his muzzle.
"I was abandoned, my only family taken from me just like that... S-so quickly. I had to live alone for many days, and most of the time, I didn't even know what I was doing... Or where my next meal came from... Or who to trust... What to trust." His face disheartened.
"...I was lost. It was as if I was in a dark place with no light for me to see anything... And it was so scary... I thought I was going to die without my parents...! I thought that... So many times..."
Zoar stood mutely. He seemed to have felt every single little drop of pain that was coursing through the child. The atmosphere was dead cold and sluggishly heavy, sending the weight of the world onto Zoar's back as he spoke.
"...But that's when... You came. And you saved me!" Avian explained, his bright grin coming back to his face. Zoar's eyes widened slightly.
"You saved me... So many times... And you taught me so much about survival. About the forest... About Pokemon... Everything!" The pup grabbed his paws tightly. "From that time... All I knew was 'escape', 'flee', 'go,' 'run'. But... I'm tired of running. Now I want to stay back and fight, I want everyone to know that I'm not the coward they think I am! I want to become strong, and that's because of you! You gave me something to live for again!"
That was when Avian's mood saddened again, almost in disappointment. His voice decreased in volume, and in confidence.
"Zoar... I was so afraid that... If I ever told you the truth, you would leave me. And... I would be alone again with no one to take care of me...!" His lips began to tremble. "S-so, I hid it from you! And now...! We're close to my home... And...! And that means you're gonna leave, right...?"
The Luxray was unable to speak.
"You have your pack to go back to. Even if they treat you like that, they take care for you and make sure you're alive... And that's all that matters to me," Avian continued. "You've already taught me... So, so much. I don't want to be a burden to you any longer than I have to be. I know how to survive now, so... You can leave when we get to my cave, and you can go back to your pride!" The pup was unsure to even put Zoar in his line of vision again after what he said, but bravery made him do so anyway. "Is that... What you want...?"
Silence.
Silence parted the two like a razor blade. None of them could handle what they just heard. Zoar was utterly stunned at the Riolu's words, even Avian was questioning his own sentences, and especially what Zoar thought of them after his speech. He couldn't read his face, it was deprived of any emotion other than shock. The boy began to wonder if he said something, anything wrong; he desperately didn't eat to mess everything up. Not anymore.
After a moment, Zoar took in a deep breath. He used his paw to turn Avian to face him, but the pup couldn't bring himself to look at him. He just stared at the soft earth below him.
"Ave. Look at me," the older Pokemon urged. Avian hesitated, causing Zoar to move his paw to tilt his chin. "Do you know why I saved you back when we first met?" The pup didn't reply. He couldn't muster the strength to say anything at all. "It's because... I felt bad for you, Ave," the Pokemon confessed. "What you said to me that night... It... Really sparked something in me. It made me wonder if you really deserved this, a young Pokemon like you..." His darkened face firmed. "And now, after all this time, I know my answer. Avian, you are a strong Pokemon. You've trained and fought so hard ever since you've wanted to evolve, and I know you're a survivor. I know that if I leave you here, you'd do just fine on your own."
Worry filled Avian to the brim of his being. "If he leaves me here"...? Zoar shut his eyes.
"But... You're still young-- heh, I know you don't like hearing that. And you're still learning about... life. Learning about living is just something that I don't want you to go on without, and you just can't learn about by 'training' day and night to strengthen yourself.
Living life is about 'evolving', but not just physically. Life isn't fair, like you said before. It dishes out many things you might not want to ever happen, or even things you might have never expected..." A pang of sadness filled Avian's chest; he knew what he was hinting at. There was a morbid expression on Zoar's face as he went on. "...And after what you've been through with your... Um... I can't guarantee you'll grow up... Normally."
Zoar hastily added on. "I-I'm not saying that you're flawed or anything, I'm just saying that..." He inhaled to reagin his thoughts. "Children like you... They should be growing up with a mom and a dad, right? Parents have a job to teach their children the ways of their world, that's how Pokemon are molded." Avian avoided his gaze, but listened intently to his wise words. "What I'm saying is that... When you are taught about life, you need other Pokemon to guide you. Pokemon who have conquered more of life than you did. Because... Everyone must power through life, it's part of what being 'alive' is all about. And I kept you alive because I wanted you to see not just the horrible events that it can give you, but the beauties and marvels as well."
The child raised his head up slowly.
"I want you to see... And do great things in life, Ave. I want you to evolve, not just into a Lucario, but into the very best Pokemon you could ever be. That's my dream for you. And I'm willing to do anything to see it through." Zoar crouched down to Avian's height. He tried his best to gather all of his thoughts.
He loved this pup, he felt it.
Every time he would knock down those berries in the forest...
Every time he knocked his powerful figure down when the sparred...
...When he saved him.
Zoar always felt a special feeling form within him: Pride. Pride in another being's accomplishment. Never had he felt it before... Until now. When Avian entered his wold, his life turned upside down. He did things he thought he was never capable of doing within his pack because of their callous restrictions.
And after what they did to him... To Avian.
He knew this was going to be the right choice.
"Ave, we're a team, right?" he asked, gaining the child's full attention with the serious tone of his voice. Avian nodded immediately, not even doubting the idea for a second. They were like two Cherubis, inseparable, codependent. Avian loved him as much he loved him back, and he felt that Zoar was aware of it completely. The Luxray took a deep breath.
"I want to leave my stupid pack... So that I can take care of you."
Avian gasped silently, and Zoar sighed.
"I know this is fast, we've known each other for only a little while. I don't know how you feel, but--"
"Zoar..." he siad.
"Hm...?"
He watched Avian's expressions shift.
"I think it was meant to happen," he murmured.
"What was?"
"My parents..." he answered. "I think it was fate..." Zoar gawked at his words.
"...Why?" was all he could ask. Avian stepped forward, eyes watering
"So that... I could meet such a nice Pokemon like you...!"
He suddenly burst out crying, running into Zoar's chest and hugging his neck tightly.
"I wanna stay with you too, Zoar!"
He buried his face under his fur to hide his joy-filled and relieved tears. Happiness bubbled from within him that he couldn't describe. It was as if he heard the greatest news in the whole wide world, and that it was celebrating just for him with a jubilant explosion.
Zoar paused abruptly for a moment at the child's touch, but soon relaxed, hugging him back with his free paw. He gave him soothing pats on the back as he held him tight.
"I'm... I'm so happy...!" Avian stuttered, sniffing occasionally. "Y-you don't know how happy I...!"
"I'm glad, kit. I am too," he replied gently, closing his eyes. "I'm so grateful to have met you; you changed my life for the best, I feel it."
Avian grinned, thinking for a minute. He wanted to ask, but didn't know how he would react. Though, the reaction Zoar gave to him about his parents... Surely he wouldn't mind.
"Zoar? Can I do one more thing before we go?" he asked timidly.
"Of course, Ave." He smiled. "What is it?" The pup went quiet.
"Can... Can we go visit my cave?" He pursed his lips. "I want to see it again."
Zoar took a moment to stare the pup in his longing eyes, melting his interior. He nodded with no second thought.
"Absolutely," he replied. "Come on, lead the way."
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