If I lay here. If I close my eyes. If I slow down my breathing. Maybe I can block the world out for even a little bit. Too many things go on in the world at once. Too much commotion and violence.

I open my eyes and stare up at my fan.

I like the night better. It's quieter. It gives me time to think. Not much happens at night when the world is asleep.

I sit up in bed.

That's why I don't sleep. Can't. If I do I'll have the same recurring nightmares. It's just easier for me to sit awake at night I guess.

I open up my laptop. 2:34 am shows up on the screen.

Tomorrow's the first day of school. High school. I'm going to be in high school. I have my new backpack already packed up.

I sign into tumblr and scroll aimlessly through while Sherlock plays in another tab.

If my mom comes in my room she'll probably be mad at me for being up this late on a school night. She doesn't understand. She never will understand.

I slide off my bed and sneak out of my room. I tip toe into the kitchen then still a box of cookies and cream poptarts. Those are my favorite. I walk back into my room and continue watching Netflix.

Sometimes being an insomniac sucks. Like, if I have something I want to tell someone I have to wait and try to remember until morning. But, being an insomniac is actually kinda great in some ways. You don't have to talk to people, there's no one there to judge you, and it's silent. Really silent. There's not as many cars driving around at night. There's no one outside. No one to bother me. It's actually quite peaceful.

I put on a sweatshirt and walk outside. The night air isn't too cold yet. It's only the beginning of September. I walk to the trampoline and lay down. There's a few dogs barking in the distance. I don't mind them; they're not bothering me. I stare up at the night sky. The stars shine so bright. There's billions of them. Amazing.

I kinda just lay there until the sun starts to peak up from behind the trees. Then I run back inside. Mom and Dad don't need to know that I was outside.

I slowly close my bedroom door and lay in bed. I close my eyes. I slow my breathing. I lay very still. My door creaks open.

"Emmie," My Dad says. "Time to wake up. It's time for school." My eyes slowly open. "You're an early bird, unlike your brother, that's what I like about you." I give him a small smile. Little does he know.