~Chapter 22~

"Before I get to Belle, there's some background you should know," I began, my hands shaking slightly but I ignored my nerves, focusing on Axel's encouraging look instead. "Well, as you know, I was dating this guy, River Daniels — Satan in an angel's mask I tell you. What I didn't say is how bad he actually was or what he, me as well I suppose, were involved in.

"River was part of a gang, not the guy in charge but he was pretty high up. We'd been dating for about five months or so when I got involved with all of it and to this day I just wish I hadn't gone to the corner shop that night..."

~*~*~

"Zack! Did you finish ALL the ice cream?!" I shouted to my brother, who was upstairs, from the freezer, trying to locate the creamy deliciousness I'd bought only two days ago.

"Maybe..." he called back and I groaned, slamming the freezer shut.

It looked like I was going to have to buy more. Urgh.

It wasn't long before I was outside, walking to the overpriced corner shop that was about ten minutes from my house on foot. Luckily, it wasn't hard to leave past curfew, seeing as mother wasn't home — nothing new there — dad was busy in his office and Anna, our nanny, was too busy dealing with the triplets to notice me.

I didn't mind walks at night, it felt quite freeing honestly but I was, however, annoyed at the decision I'd made to not wear a coat. I clung to the thin jacket I'd chosen to wear instead, cursing it in my mind. I really was stupid sometimes.

To pass the time and hopefully distract myself from the cold, I pulled my phone from my pocket to see a message from my boyfriend, River. I smiled despite myself as I replied, unable to wipe the stupid grin off my face at his message.

That boy had somehow managed to beguile me and I wasn't complaining. He was the perfect guy in every sense of the word and made me feel like a princess all the time; I couldn't have asked for anything better.

After replying to him, I messaged my best friend, Belle, telling her about Zack and how annoying he was for stealing my ice cream — the nerve.

I decided to slip on my headphones — luckily I hadn't forgotten those — and listen to music for the rest of my unplanned walk, humming silently to the songs ringing in my ears.

It wasn't until I was just a few minutes from my destination that my phone started to buzz and vibrate, the music cutting off; River was calling me. There were butterflies in my stomach as I answered the call; I always felt so giddy around him. "Hey."

"Hey, baby doll. How are you?" River asked, his voice deep and raspy in a way that made the butterflies in my stomach dance.

"I'm good thanks. Just on my way to the corner shop by my house."

"This late at night by yourself?" His worrying made me blush. How did I land such a considerate gentleman?

"River, relax," I chuckled softly. "I'm fine. I've done this so many times."

"I know, baby, I know but I can't help but worry about you."

I giggled into the receiver, tucking a strand of loose hair behind my ear, finally spotting the corner shop in the dim street lighting.

"Shit," he cursed suddenly and it sounded like his car was swerving. He'd only passed his test two weeks ago so he wasn't the best just yet. Unfairly, I was born in July so it would be ages before I'd be able to drive but I'd been having secret lessons with Nathan and Zack so hopefully I'd be able to pass as soon as my birthday came around.

"River, you alright?"

"Yep, all good, baby doll. Just a minor kink in the works."

"What'd you mean?"

He cursed again, this time much louder. "Scratch that, major kink," he spat bitterly.

A knot was forming in my stomach and I unconsciously held the phone tighter. "River, what's wrong?"

Another loud noise crashed through the speaker. "Ummm... baby, did you say you were by the corner shop?"

I nodded even though he couldn't see me. "Yeah," I whispered tentatively.

"I'm coming over, keep an eye out. I'll only be a minute," he said before hanging up abruptly.

That was beyond weird. My stomach knot tightened as I walked, shoving my phone into my pocket. Breathe, Harper, he was fine. He was fine.

No matter how much I told myself that, I couldn't scrap the feeling that something awful was about to happen. Why did I feel like I was going to get involved in some bad shit?

That was a ridiculous thought. River was perfect. There couldn't possibly be anything bad about him. There just couldn't be.

I pushed the thoughts to the back of my mind and carried on walking. I was just reaching for the handle of the corner shop door when I heard a car honk and, true to his word, River was sitting in his car waiting for me. "Over here, pretty thing," he called as I went over to him.

I was about to walk around to the passenger side when he pulled me in so I was on the driver's seat with him. "River, what are you doing?"

Before I could even blink, the door shut behind me and River was in the passenger seat. "Drive, baby doll."

"What?"

He was joking, right?

Please tell me he was joking.

"No time for questions. You've got to drive, baby, and fast."

I didn't have time to open my mouth before I saw a large black van in the rearview mirror getting dangerously close to us.

"Shit, Harper, now!"

River never shouted at me. Without thinking twice, I stepped on the gas, pelting the car forward and onto the main road.

My hands shook as I gripped to steering wheel too tightly, confused and scared. Why was that van following us? "River, what's going on?" I asked, my voice trembling.

He didn't answer, instead reaching into the back of the car and grabbing something from under the faux leather seat: a gun.

What the actual fuck?

"River," my voice was louder, the panic I was feeling blatantly obvious. "What the fuck?"

"Relax, gorgeous. Just drive and don't worry about me."

Don't worry? How was I supposed to not worry when he was holding a fucking gun? What had I gotten myself involved in?

I didn't say anything, too scared to open my mouth as River loaded the gun with bullets before opening the skylight in the roof. "Baby, listen to me carefully," he started, rubbing my thigh tenderly and despite my fear I didn't pull away. There was a reason for this and River knew what he was doing so I just had to stay calm. I had to stay calm. He was my boyfriend after all.

"I need you to turn right here and then stay on this road. Keep the car steady, okay?"

I nodded, still not able to talk but when he stood up, the top half of his body no longer in the car, I couldn't hold back the whimpers. What was going on?

He ducked back down, looking at me with such sincerity in his deep brown eyes. "Relax, baby," he cooed but I was still shaking. "Do you trust me?"

"Yes," I said, not missing a beat. I loved this boy so I trusted him beyond everything. No matter how scared I was, I knew I was safe with him.

"Good," he smiled, kissing me but our moment was short-lived when I swerved the car after the sound of bullets hitting metal.

"Shit," he cursed, grabbing his gun and going back to standing, aiming the killing machine at the black van behind us.

Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.

I heard the sound of River firing the gun and I tried not to let the image forming in my head terrify me. River wasn't a killer; he wouldn't hurt someone. He just wouldn't.

I glimpsed at the van through my rearview mirror and saw that the windshield had shattered. What was worse was the fact that someone was firing bullets back at us through the fragmented glass.

Crap. Crap. Crap.

I accidentally jostled the car in my momentary panic and heard River collide with the side. "Fuck! Sweetness, you need to be more careful," he chastised.

I had to stay calm.

I just had to stay calm. How hard could that be?

Just then, our back windshield shattered, shards of glass flying everywhere and a shriek escaped my lips as I tried my damn hardest not to shake the car. If I wanted to get out of this alive, I couldn't screw this up.

"That's good, baby," River called to me from his position, his upper body still outside the car. "Just like that, steady does it."

I didn't know how long I stayed like that, gripping the steering wheel for dear life as River fired bullet after bullet at the van — kudos to the driver, they were doing a great job at avoiding his onslaught of attacks.

Tears were streaming down my cheeks but I didn't let my fear stop me and just did exactly what my boyfriend told me. I had to keep us both safe, I had to.

Finally, after what seemed like a lifetime, the black van stopped following us, the entire vehicle destroyed behind us. But I didn't stop driving, not for another half an hour like River had instructed me to do where we would ditch our own damaged car and his friend would come and pick us up.

"River, what the hell was that?" I finally asked after I knew we were both safe.

He looked at me, the guilt on his face making my stomach twist. "I'm sorry, sugar. I'm so sorry I've gotten you involved in all of this but I didn't know who else to turn to."

I grabbed his hand, clutching it tightly to try and bring him comfort. "I'm always here for you, baby," I said softly.

He smiled weakly at me. "I know and I'm so grateful. I don't know what I'd do without you darling but I hate that I've gotten you tied up in 'this'. I never wanted that for you. I don't want to taint my princess," he said, tucking a small tendril of auburn hair behind my ear.

My insides felt gooey with him being so close and it took everything in me not to shiver in pleasure when his hand moved to caress my cheek delicately; I needed to stay focused and find out what the hell was going on. "What exactly is 'this'?" I asked carefully.

He sighed, looking me dead in the eye, his gaze not wavering for a second. "Promise you won't leave me?" He sounded so sad and so vulnerable that my heart almost broke.

"River, nothing could make me leave you. I love you, baby. So much it hurts," I confessed and his eyes gleamed with happiness.

"I love you even more my perfect baby angel. So so so fucking much," he declared before kissing me hard, his fingers wound around my waist and mine tied in his hair.

He loved me. He actually loved me.

It was at that moment that I knew I'd do absolutely anything for this boy. Anything and everything for him to love me always and hold me close for the rest of my days.

I didn't it realise at the time but that was my fatal mistake.

~*~*~

"So from there, things went from bad to worse. River and I worked side by side in the gang together and did some things I'm really not proud of but I was too blinded by love to care or see how wrong it was. I'm not using that as an excuse; I know it was my own fault and I'll never forgive myself for it but I'd like to at least shove a little of the blame on him.

"Whilst all of this was going on, Belle and I grew further and further apart. She obviously didn't agree with what I was doing and said River was a bad influence. Stupidly, I ignored her and listened to River when he told me she was just jealous of how close we were and was trying to break us up.

"We stopped talking and, without her to watch my back, I started to get more and more involved in gang life. It took seeing one of my classmates and close friend at the time, Izzy Walters, sh—" I cut myself off, gulping. "Shot to death in cold blood right in front of me to realise that this wasn't the life I wanted.

"She wasn't the first to die but all the little things had been building up and that same day I'd gotten a text from Belle — the first in months — and I knew that if my best friend hadn't given up on me, despite how much of a bitch I was being, there was still hope.

"So, I plucked up the courage and spoke to River about wanting out. Of course, it wasn't that easy and we had the worst fight of my life. I still remember the horrible things we said to each other and, despite how much I don't like the guy anymore, I still feel awful. It was no way to treat someone..." I drifted off, thinking back to that night and shuddered at the memories.

"Anyways," I said, snapping out of my trance. "We broke up and I went to the guy in charge at the gang and told him I wanted out. He wouldn't let me go but when I told the sob story about how I'd just broken up with River and couldn't be around him anymore, he let me leave temporarily as long as I swore to keep my mouth shut and come back if needed.

"I complied to his terms and went rushing over to Belle's house to apologise for everything, praying that she'd forgive me, but when I got there she wasn't home. In my gut, I knew something was wrong but I tried to ignore it.

"Turns out I was right. A few hours later I got a call..." I stopped again, a lump forming in my throat.

My whole body was shaking as I recalled the past, not prepared for what I was about to say. "Belle and her dad were... dead. They'd died in a motorcycle accident. The courts settled the affair as an unfortunate accident but I'm almost positive that wasn't true. It was a warning from the gang to stay quiet, one which I'd never forget — until now I suppose but I know you won't say anything," I paused, tears, welling in my eyes yet again.

Talking about this was too painful but he had to know the truth. I just couldn't carry this alone any longer.

Stringing together all the courage I owned, I breathed out heavily, meeting Axel's caring eyes for the briefest second before looking away, fiddling with my fingers instead. "So because of my idiocy, I... I... indirectly killed my best friend. If had just listened to her, it could have all been avoided.

"If... if I hadn't met River everything would be different but no matter how much I want to, I can't blame him for everything. He manipulated me our entire relationship into doing his bidding but I still can't say it was all his fault. At the end of the day, I listened to him and it was because of me Belle was killed.

"I killed my best friend," I sobbed, my face in the throw pillow I was holding, tears staining the expensive fabric but I didn't care. "And... and I'll never forgive myself for it."

~*~*~

So that's some answers about Harper's past...

Bit of a longer chapter this time which hopefully you enjoyed. Let me know what you thought of it x

Anyways, until next time my lovely readers, stay safe xx