i really don't want to feel
anything anymore

every time i care for someone
they end up hurting me
and i end up wanting to kill myself

it's so unhealthy

how the first thought
that comes to my mind
when things don't turn out
the way i want them to

is

"i want to die"

and most people don't know
that joke i make everyday
i mean it, in all honesty

i don't want to like anyone
i don't want to get attached to you
i don't want to want to die because of something i have no control over

like your feelings
and your actions

if you don't like me back
i can't change that

i'm completely unstable
so get away from me

i don't want you to see
the horrible things
that lie underneath

please