Chapter 79

Lying in bed, holding my Pumpkin in my arms after finally having made love to her felt like being cast a spell I didn't want to break.

We were quiet the only sound resonating was our breathing and the snow being blown by the wind against the painting shack.

Lexi was lying on top of me, my hand running up and down her back lazily, holding on to her close with the other.

I could fall asleep like this, so easily, but I didn't want to sleep.

If I slept, maybe when I would wake up, all of this would be a dream.

It didn't feel real. It felt a lot more like a dream. So, I wouldn't doze off.

"Who are the two kids you were paintings, before I came here and rudely interrupted you?" Lexi asked softly, breaking the silence.

"You can rudely interrupt me anytime you want, Pumpkin," I replied, eyes closed, content smile on my lips.

"Trying to distract me?"

I chuckled, and gave her a little squeeze, holding on to her more tightly for just a second. "No. I'm honestly not sure. I could be us. It could be our future children."

Lexi snorted, and kissed my chest. "We're talking about children now?"

"You're the one who brought up marrying me first."

"Just because we're having sex now doesn't mean I'm ready for kids, Lexi said, leaning her chin on my chest, looking up at me.

"We never had that conversation though, have we?" I said, looking back at her, running my fingers through her hair.

"We're eighteen, I think it's too young to talk about having children."

"But do you think you want them? Eventually?" I asked, genuinely curious. I saw my future with Lexi. This mattered.

"I don't know."

"You'd be a great mom. You've always been good at taking care of people," I remarked.

I wasn't sure I'd be a good dad though. I wasn't sure if children was something I wanted either.

"But that's the thing. I've been taking care of people a lot. Maybe I want to be selfish now."

This made sense. Lexi was often the care giver. Anytime someone got hurt around her, she always had the reflex to go take care of them. But this didn't mean that because she was motherly in her interactions, she needed to become a mother too.

"So? No kids?"

"Ohmygooood Blake," Lexi said, letting out an exasperated sigh, making me laugh. "Yes, one day I might like to have your babies, but can we oh, I don't know, maybe finish high school first? I don't plan on having a teenage pregnancy."

I grinned at her, and at the prospect of a future with her. And maybe with children too.

"I can't wait to have little Lexi's running around," I said, a little dreamily.

"Many little Lexi's would be a nightmare."

"A dreaaaaam, you mean. A bunch of tiny yous?" I sighed, contently. "Perfection."

"Young me was not cute. My sister made me piss in a glass on a dare. I've kicked my brother in the nuts multiple times. I used to throw rocks at people walking too close to our yard because I was territorial."

"Little menace."

"I beat up a mascot Blake."

"I love my feisty girlfriend."

"You're hopeless."

"You're still naked in my arms. You can do no wrong."

I didn't even need to look at her to know she was rolling her eyes at me right now.

"Speaking of naked in your arm, you don't have a bathroom here, do you?" Lexi asked, her cheeks turning a little pink.

"Unfortunately, no."

"Pretty sure I bled," she said in a small voice.

I worried instantly. "Are you okay? Are you hurt?"

Lexi shook her head. "No, I'm fine. It hurt for maybe a second, but then... it felt too good to notice. But I might have made a mess," she answered, a little sheepishly.

"I don't really care about that." As long as she wasn't hurt, that was all that mattered.

"It's not super sexy."

She really didn't need to worry about any of that. "I'm gonna say it again. Naked. In my arms. Can do no wrong."

"Not super excited to get dressed."

I chuckled. "Again. Naked—"

She pinched my side. "Shut up you little bitch."

I chuckled again. And then asked, "Do you want to go back in the house, take a shower and cuddle in an actual bed?"

"That does sound like a good plan. I don't actually want to get up though."

"Alright, ten more minutes," I whispered against her hair, kissing her head, and closed my eyes, my hold on her never faltering.

A little while later, we reluctantly got dress to head back inside.

I crouched in front of Lexi, grabbed her arms from behind and wrapped them around my neck, forcing her to get on my back.

"What are you doing?" she laughed.

"Giving you a piggyback ride back to my room."

"You know there's like three feet of snow outside, right?"

"What kind of boyfriend would I be if I made you walk in those three feet of snow?"

"You're ridiculous," she said, but I could hear the smile in her voice, and her arms wrapped more tightly around my shoulders, as my hands rested on the legs she had wrapped around my waist.

This was starting to feel dangerously close to earlier and even with a thick barrier of clothes, my skin was prickling.

It was wild. We'd just have sex. I thought that would have calmed some of the fire inside of me, but it felt like it had just made things worse.

I knew exactly how it felt now. And I needed more.

I reigned it in though, and made my way in the snow back to the main house.

There wasn't actually three more feet of snow, but it was enough that I could feel some getting inside my boots from the top.

I hadn't realized how much it had snowed. I hadn't noticed a lot of things today.

When we got to the house, no one was hanging around, so we reached my room without crossing my parents or Anita.

I carried Lexi all the way up to my room, and sat her down in the bathroom and went to grab us a change of clothes, and then realized I didn't really want either of us to wear clothes, so went back in.

At that point, Lexi was brushing her teeth, so I grinned at her through the mirror and followed her lead.

"Shower or bath?" I asked around my toothbrush.

"Bath would be nice, but I'm pretty sure I'd fall asleep in it," Lexi replied.

"Shower it is."

Lexi slipped into the shower first and I grabbed our clothes and threw everything in the laundry basket.

My Pumpkin popped her head out. "Wait, wait, you can't put my clothes in the hamper. Anita can't wash them!"

I snorted. "Why?"

"She'll see the blood!"

I kept my amused grin as under control as I could. "And?"

"I'll wash it!"

I wasn't exactly sure why this seemed to bother her so much. It wasn't like bleeding in general was a new activity for her. I'd witness the painful process she went through while on a period a few times now.

"I know this might sound wild, but I have this super weird skills, it's called doing my own laundry."

"You do your laundry?"

I shrugged, and joined her in the shower, making her take a step back. "Sometimes yeah. I don't expect Anita to always clean up after me, she already has enough to do."

"You know how to do laundry?" she repeated.

"I thought we'd already established the fact that I'm not as stupid as you first made me out to be," I teased her with a grin brushing her hair back.

"So, you'll do the laundry?"

"If that can put your mind at ease I will. But I highly doubt Anita rummages through my dirty clothes and tries to pinpoint what are all the stains on them. As previously mentioned, she's busy."

"I sound like a freak," she said in a small voice, wrapping her arms around me.

I shook with laughter, still stroking her hair. "No, you're cute, don't worry. I love my overthinking Pumpkin."

"You know? There's something I know is really good at stopping the overthinking," my Pumpkin said with a wicked grin, looking up at me.

I grinned back. "Oh yeah?"

"Yeah."

"Isn't there like a resting period between the first and subsequent times?"

"Don't know, don't care," she pulled me to her, her arms around my neck, and I pressed my lips against her, kissing her.

There wasn't any kind of hurry behind this kiss. It was a slow, unhurried kiss, deep but solid, the kind of kiss that ground you, the kind of kiss that made you feel like you belonged at this exact place at this exact time.

I pressed her back against the shower tiles, our bodies flush.

There hadn't been any space left between us before. It felt right to keep things that way.

I wanted her again. I wanted her right now. I needed her.

But we were both tired, and even if Lexi said she was fine, I didn't want to risk hurting her, so I didn't let things escalade too much.

Instead, I broke our kiss and washed her hair and washed the skin I had covered in kissed barely an hour ago.

After the shower we slipped into bed, no clothes between us, but just warm skin and our beating hearts, wrapped in each other's arms.

It was way too early for me to usually go to bed, but I was sleepy and content.

This felt like a solemn moment, a particularly precious one.

Tomorrow, life would be back to the regular schedule.

But today, everything had changed. 

_______________

Happy Monday my little Pumpkins! <3

I hope last week was a good one for you, and that if it wasn't this chapter was a good escape from a little while. 

You know what's strange about being bilingual? It's that you're basically shit at two languages. Just now, that sentence before, in my head I thought "this chapter was a good échappatoire, wait, what's the word for échappatoire in English again? Lemme look it up. Hey, what is it saying loophole, I'm not using échappatoire in that sense, wait, is échappatoire not about, like getting away from something potentially unpleasant? Have I used that word wrong all my life? Is it a French-French/Quebec-French thing?" and then it just spirals for a little while until I figure out escape is a good enough alternative. And this little dance works both ways. Sometimes I think of a word in English and can't for the life of me remember the French equivalent. Even if French is my first language. Good times.

Anyway! XD This chapter was really important to me because I wanted to show the aftermath of a first time. I've seen the whole spectrum of experiences in books and I wanted to show that it doesn't have to be this painful experience. If you're with the right person, if you're with someone that cares for you and knows what they're doing, it doesn't actually have to hurt all that much. So, no need to be scared. 

And now our little Blake and Lexi are getting into their blissful era. They should make the most of it while it lasts. ;P I've mentioned this on Patreon, but I'll say it here now too. 

Once Blake gets into the accident, it'll be the end of Little Bitch. And the beginning of getting back into Lexi's head. I Sold sequel y'all. All the Adventures are going to merge into a new Lexi story. I'm really excited to get back in her head. Still looking for a title for that sequel though. XD Oh well, no stress, I still have a little while before that happens. But. Get ready! :D

Alright, gonna go now. See you all next week! (or tomorrow if you read Nik's story)

Love you guys! <3